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Annoying Asian Parents watch

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    Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, I appreciate the fact that they have given me food and shelter and have been working hard just to make sure I am comfortable. But sometimes they say things I hate and are extremely strict. For example, my mum told me 'if you don't do the chores everyday you will get beaten up by your in laws' and I'm only 16. My dad on the other hand, is also very sexist and stereotypical as he always says things like daughters do the housework which really gets me angry because my brothers have earphones on 24/7, listening to music but still, they're not told to do a single thing. But I have so much pressure coming from my academic life, I have to study for my a levels, revise for my theory, and on top of that I have to do chores, drop my sister of to school, pick her up and take her to mosque,my brothers are never asked to do these things. My mum monitors everything I do. She checks my phone, she compares me with other people, forces me to be someone I'm not, verbally abuses me, doesn't let me go out with friends, doesn't let me listen to music, calls me lazy when I've got so much pressure from studies, back bites about me to her friends and then wonders why I don't like being in front of them. I'm not allowed to listen to music but my brothers can, you could all probably work out why, she even makes sure my t-shirts are not too short, checking the size in detail. Has anyone got parents like this and if you do how do you stop them from getting on your nerves??
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    My parents are also asian however they are not that strict,of course my mom swears at me and compares me to other girls but they are not that extreme, i think maybe its more of cultural thing.
    This is how they were brought up so I don't think they are able to change
    just continue to study and show them the power of a women.
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    I Think its just because they are worried about you and don't want the future they had, to happen to you.(MAYBE YOUR MUM WENT THROUGH A BAD EXPERIENCE WITH HER INLAWS). or its just tradition/culture. cant really change it. maybe you should try and explain to them that inlwas aint like that nowadays. ik that might be hard coming from an Asian household my self tho im lucky my parents don't put too much pressure on me. i'm 16 too. the music part is mainly from islam. not culture. music has an affect on your heart and mind as proved by science and it usually has a negative long term effect ( mainly the music out now) tho u may feel ''hyped'' when listen to it in the moment. but yeah its haram and god knows best. it is quite strange tho however how ur bros are allowed. if its haram its for both. lol. are they older then u? just ask god for help with you family problems x
    • #1
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    (Original post by R.Lunat)
    I Think its just because they are worried about you and don't want the future they had, to happen to you.(MAYBE YOUR MUM WENT THROUGH A BAD EXPERIENCE WITH HER INLAWS). or its just tradition/culture. cant really change it. maybe you should try and explain to them that inlwas aint like that nowadays. ik that might be hard coming from an Asian household my self tho im lucky my parents don't put too much pressure on me. i'm 16 too. the music part is mainly from islam. not culture. music has an affect on your heart and mind as proved by science and it usually has a negative long term effect ( mainly the music out now) tho u may feel ''hyped'' when listen to it in the moment. but yeah its haram and god knows best. it is quite strange tho however how ur bros are allowed. if its haram its for both. lol. are they older then u? just ask god for help with you family problems x
    She does have problems with the in-laws but it's nothing similar to what she's doing to me and yes, I do think it's the culture, I just hate how some Asian parents treat girls like slaves, it's not fair at all. Boys get away with a lot of things and are not asked to do anything. I can't talk to my parents about these issues, they just hate it when I say something against them. My parents are so strict that they force my sister to wear the head scarf and she's only five...
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    i feel you, phone checks are the worst. breach of privacy
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She does have problems with the in-laws but it's nothing similar to what she's doing to me and yes, I do think it's the culture, I just hate how some Asian parents treat girls like slaves, it's not fair at all. Boys get away with a lot of things and are not asked to do anything. I can't talk to my parents about these issues, they just hate it when I say something against them. My parents are so strict that they force my sister to wear the head scarf and she's only five...
    My sister sits about while I (a male) do all the ****
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    I am afraid there is nothing you can do about it, this is a common behavior among Asian parents and trying to negotiate with them won't do any help
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She does have problems with the in-laws but it's nothing similar to what she's doing to me and yes, I do think it's the culture, I just hate how some Asian parents treat girls like slaves, it's not fair at all. Boys get away with a lot of things and are not asked to do anything. I can't talk to my parents about these issues, they just hate it when I say something against them. My parents are so strict that they force my sister to wear the head scarf and she's only five...
    do they legit ''force'' her? like I remember when I was 5 I would wear it outside sometimes(lol but I think it was mainly coz of the cold so I used it as a substitute for a hat) it was never forced. just encouraged so when I was older it wouldn't be hard. I would always take it off anyways but they dint mind. I started to wear it properly around 11 when I hit puberty. do they encourage ur sis or force her? and yeah about the girls being slaves...its just the Asian mentality. It is hard to speak something against them or disagree. just Asian mentality.hopefully we both find husbands who actually help around the house lol XD. I
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    That's asain life, many people are experiencing the the same, if not worse.

    It sad that I have accepted this as reality, but hey ho, once their generation dies out, maybe these cultural ties will fade away. Just realised what I said since my parents are part of that generation, but yeah you know what I mean.
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    music has an affect on your heart and mind as proved by science and it usually has a negative long term effect ( mainly the music out now)

    no it doesn't.
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    How do you get on with your brothers? Can't they support you and reason with your parents especially your mum?
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    Community Assistant
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, I appreciate the fact that they have given me food and shelter and have been working hard just to make sure I am comfortable. But sometimes they say things I hate and are extremely strict. For example, my mum told me 'if you don't do the chores everyday you will get beaten up by your in laws' and I'm only 16. My dad on the other hand, is also very sexist and stereotypical as he always says things like daughters do the housework which really gets me angry because my brothers have earphones on 24/7, listening to music but still, they're not told to do a single thing. But I have so much pressure coming from my academic life, I have to study for my a levels, revise for my theory, and on top of that I have to do chores, drop my sister of to school, pick her up and take her to mosque,my brothers are never asked to do these things. My mum monitors everything I do. She checks my phone, she compares me with other people, forces me to be someone I'm not, verbally abuses me, doesn't let me go out with friends, doesn't let me listen to music, calls me lazy when I've got so much pressure from studies, back bites about me to her friends and then wonders why I don't like being in front of them. I'm not allowed to listen to music but my brothers can, you could all probably work out why, she even makes sure my t-shirts are not too short, checking the size in detail. Has anyone got parents like this and if you do how do you stop them from getting on your nerves??
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, I appreciate the fact that they have given me food and shelter and have been working hard just to make sure I am comfortable. But sometimes they say things I hate and are extremely strict. For example, my mum told me 'if you don't do the chores everyday you will get beaten up by your in laws' and I'm only 16. My dad on the other hand, is also very sexist and stereotypical as he always says things like daughters do the housework which really gets me angry because my brothers have earphones on 24/7, listening to music but still, they're not told to do a single thing. But I have so much pressure coming from my academic life, I have to study for my a levels, revise for my theory, and on top of that I have to do chores, drop my sister of to school, pick her up and take her to mosque,my brothers are never asked to do these things. My mum monitors everything I do. She checks my phone, she compares me with other people, forces me to be someone I'm not, verbally abuses me, doesn't let me go out with friends, doesn't let me listen to music, calls me lazy when I've got so much pressure from studies, back bites about me to her friends and then wonders why I don't like being in front of them. I'm not allowed to listen to music but my brothers can, you could all probably work out why, she even makes sure my t-shirts are not too short, checking the size in detail. Has anyone got parents like this and if you do how do you stop them from getting on your nerves??
    She can judge you, compare you with your peers, back bite about you all she likes - but you don't have to listen to her. Just remember that you're not living your life according to her liking. Don't listen to anyone's judgement of you unless they are perfect themselves.

    16 is quite young though, she may be less controlling once you're in college, or I hope she will be.
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    What is it with all these forcing to wear headscarves..
    A 5 year old will usually wear anything without fuss. Smh... I sense a troll.
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    (Original post by LEFRS)
    music has an affect on your heart and mind as proved by science and it usually has a negative long term effect ( mainly the music out now)

    no it doesn't.
    OK that's fine. You ARE accustomed to your own belief
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by R.Lunat)
    do they legit ''force'' her? like I remember when I was 5 I would wear it outside sometimes(lol but I think it was mainly coz of the cold so I used it as a substitute for a hat) it was never forced. just encouraged so when I was older it wouldn't be hard. I would always take it off anyways but they dint mind. I started to wear it properly around 11 when I hit puberty. do they encourage ur sis or force her? and yeah about the girls being slaves...its just the Asian mentality. It is hard to speak something against them or disagree. just Asian mentality.hopefully we both find husbands who actually help around the house lol XD. I
    My mum kinda predicts my sisters personality and thinks shes going to turn out really bad, the type that wont listen so shes trying to make her get used to wearing the hijab. I started wearing the hijab ate the age of 13, she never forced me because she thinks I'm the 'obedient' type...
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, I appreciate the fact that they have given me food and shelter and have been working hard just to make sure I am comfortable. But sometimes they say things I hate and are extremely strict. For example, my mum told me 'if you don't do the chores everyday you will get beaten up by your in laws' and I'm only 16. My dad on the other hand, is also very sexist and stereotypical as he always says things like daughters do the housework which really gets me angry because my brothers have earphones on 24/7, listening to music but still, they're not told to do a single thing. But I have so much pressure coming from my academic life, I have to study for my a levels, revise for my theory, and on top of that I have to do chores, drop my sister of to school, pick her up and take her to mosque,my brothers are never asked to do these things. My mum monitors everything I do. She checks my phone, she compares me with other people, forces me to be someone I'm not, verbally abuses me, doesn't let me go out with friends, doesn't let me listen to music, calls me lazy when I've got so much pressure from studies, back bites about me to her friends and then wonders why I don't like being in front of them. I'm not allowed to listen to music but my brothers can, you could all probably work out why, she even makes sure my t-shirts are not too short, checking the size in detail. Has anyone got parents like this and if you do how do you stop them from getting on your nerves??
    Omg I'm going through the same struggle. I don't know tbh, I get out the house, or just do what I want.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My mum kinda predicts my sisters personality and thinks shes going to turn out really bad, the type that wont listen so shes trying to make her get used to wearing the hijab. I started wearing the hijab ate the age of 13, she never forced me because she thinks I'm the 'obedient' type...

    omg that's just plain stupid (no offence) lol they need to let her enjoy her childhood. that being said...In their head they just think that they are doing whats best for their child I guess. i'm pretty sure their intentions aren't ''I WANT TO RUIN MY CHILDS LIFE AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE'' (EVEN THO THATS HOW IT MAY FEEL) just know that they are doing it with the best of intentions and use that as a motivation to keep on going. sending prayers your way x
    • #1
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    (Original post by Bookaddict02)
    omg that's just plain stupid (no offence) lol they need to let her enjoy her childhood. that being said...In their head they just think that they are doing whats best for their child I guess. i'm pretty sure their intentions aren't ''I WANT TO RUIN MY CHILDS LIFE AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE'' (EVEN THO THATS HOW IT MAY FEEL) just know that they are doing it with the best of intentions and use that as a motivation to keep on going. sending prayers your way x
    I know it’s stupid, it’s just not right, I guess my mums scared that my sisters going to be spoiled when she’s older.
 
 
 
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