What do I do wrong?

Hi,

I'm an 18 year old guy and I've never been in a relationship. I've spoken to lots of girls and feel as if I make connections with them and do the right things but it never amounts to anything.

Two previous girls I've spoken to seriously were interested in me and told me and we talked for about two months but then they just changed their minds? It was really confusing as I hadn't changed and thought I was doing well but without giving me a reason they just lost interest despite me supposedly doing nothing wrong.

I wasn't overly fussed about those but recently I really feel in love with this girl. She was everything and was kind, thoughtful and beautiful and I finally thought I'd found the right person. She liked me at first and said she'd be happy with me and I did everything to make her feel special, looked after and to be understanding but what happened? She lost interest. It hurts even more this time because I really was in love with her and we talked for so long and she feels really bad about it but it's really getting me down.

It feels like when girls get to know me they lose interest even though I think I'm doing all the right things or maybe they can use me as a crutch or think of me as a pushover? I'm really not sure but as it's the third time it's happened it's obviously really hurt me and got me down and made me think there's a reason for it and I don't know why.

Anyone got any advice?

Thanks

Reply 1

Dunnig Kruger

1 never ever make yourself a doormat. Never ever treat the woman you're with as highly superior to you. Treat her as an equal adult human being. Do not do" everything to make her feel special". Give her frequent highly specific and true compliments for sure, but do not stray into persistent flattery.

2 Give her little romantic presents - once you're in a relationship and not before. Women can smell someone trying to buy their love a mile off.

3 there comes a time when you have to stop speaking and start acting. When it's what you DO with the woman that counts for more than what you SAY to her.

4 If you're still at school, it's quite possible that you've done nothing wrong so far. It's just that the women you've been speaking to are not ready / mature enough for a relationship yet. Or they may want to focus on A levels for the next 3 months.

5 Status is highly attractive in a man. Demonstrate that you have more status than the other men around you and you will attract women like a magnet. Status comes in many forms and depends entirely on the context. Being rich, powerful, famous, the life and soul of the party, captain of the school cricket team, most confident guy when speaking with women in your class, pupil most like to go Oxford or Cambridge, the guy with a car etc etc etc

6. Do not criticise them. Ever. Do not try to "improve them". It's quite possible you already follow this rule as it's not something mentioned in your opening post.

What do I do wrong?

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