Being felt up in clubs

I'd never do it personally, very degrading to women, it even irritates me when it's done to me - but I do think you are inviting it if you dress sexily.

Listen to Next Contestent by Nickleback for most guys views on the subject lol.

But usually, dress really sexy and guys will assume your looking to pick up that night -

Reply 61

Hisoo

13

Ive noticed that it tends to be much older guys who do the groping. Its not even cheeky, its just scary and embaressing then.

Reply 62

leemkule

14

Whilst I totally agree that girls shouldn't be groped by guys, it's not as if the opposite doesn't happen.

I've been felt up quite a few times by girls that I didn't know in clubs and it's just deemed to be 'ok' because they're girls.

Reply 63

Levity

1

It's worse when you know them and they're not randomers. A guy at my work's christmas party kept trying to feel my ass. I was like, come on, I'm going to see you at work tomorrow you freak.

Reply 64

squeak

21

perpetual

I'd never do it personally, very degrading to women, it even irritates me when it's done to me - but I do think you are inviting it if you dress sexily.

Listen to Next Contestent by Nickleback for most guys views on the subject lol.

But usually, dress really sexy and guys will assume your looking to pick up that night -

Just because a door has a handle doesn't mean you're allowed in..

Girls can dress sexily to make themselves feel good. And even if a guy does assume a girl wants to pick up that night (and she does), doesn't mean she doesn't want to be treated with some respect.

Reply 65

emdo

12

squeak

Just because a door has a handle doesn't mean you're allowed in..

Girls can dress sexily to make themselves feel good. And even if a guy does assume a girl wants to pick up that night (and she does), doesn't mean she doesn't want to be treated with some respect.

What a quote! :biggrin:

Being felt up...I dunno, maybe if it was a guy i like and we were dancing but generally when they start getting too grabby and/or start sticking their hands in places not wanted then I'm like "No, stop it or just go away"...they do...for about two minutes.

Some girls do ask for it...by dressing sluttily. Sexy...I dunno, sexy can be classy. I wouldn't grope someone who looked classy :p:

What really annoys me is when guys do it when they want to pass you on the dance floor. I don't mind when they like place their hand on your shoulder or on your back - it's usually to signal they want to go past and they are trying not to be rude/vicious about it. Some full on grope your ass and go through...honestly! PISS OFF :mad:

Reply 66

ccharlyy

9

When I was at the bar at uni a few weeks ago, one of these guys felt my bum (it was one of about 5, dunno which) and i turned around and asked 'who the ***** did that' and they all just looked away. They then did it again, and i turned around and asked them to stop doing it (although there might have been a few swear words involved) and then turned back round to wait at the bar.
They did it again. By this point i'd got it down to 2 guys that it must have been.... so i turned around and kicked one and punched the other (Guess I really dont like it when guys do that to me as i just feel degraded like they think im some kind of meat) They kicked up a fuss but at least didnt do it again. Maybe because I shouted to the bar man that if he didnt serve me right there and then he was gonna have a murder on his hands as i was gonna kill the *****s behind me. Seemed to get his attention.

I wasn't even dressed up... I had jeans and a long sleeved tshirt on. Ok, so I have a v. curvy figure (Slim waist.... but wayyy curvy everywhere else, which i hate) but that doesnt mean I'm the 'kind of girl' who likes that kind of attention.

SO no, Girls arent asking for it.
Oh, and I don't know any girl that is gonna turn around to a guy who felt her up and say 'wow....you felt me up - lets go have sex!!', its more likely that she will instantly NOT want to do anything of the sort. you're much more likely to get a nicer response if you say 'hi, how are you' or something like that.

Reply 67

PoisonDonna

14

emdo

What really annoys me is when guys do it when they want to pass you on the dance floor. I don't mind when they like place their hand on your shoulder or on your back - it's usually to signal they want to go past and they are trying not to be rude/vicious about it. Some full on grope your ass and go through...honestly! PISS OFF :mad:

Yes!! That's so bloody annoying it's untrue.

Most of the guys who grope girls on the dancefloor dont seem too selective about it, someone who's tried it and you've booted away can generally be seen trying it again somewhere else a bit later.

Reply 68

stevo23e

i wouldnt and dont do it,its rude and unneccessary as far as i'm aware the random groping approach NEVER works.

there are some places in the city where its more likely to happen,and i feel really sorry for the girls who have to put up with it,its like female liberation past entire clubs by.

Reply 69

ccharlyy

9

stevo23e

i wouldnt and dont do it,its rude and unneccessary as far as i'm aware the random groping approach NEVER works.

Its true... I'm yet to meet anyone who has got a girl that way, or any girl that has got with a guy when hes done that.

Reply 70

Dionysus

15

I don't think anyone's really suggesting it's ok to do uninvited, but if a girl is the one who initiates it, I see no problem.

Reply 71

Anonymous #4

14

It's not just clubs either!

We went to London for New Years for the first time! And it was coold so i was wearing about 10 mil layers, jeans, boots etc. and the men were still doing it and the worse thing was - you couldn't even get away because of the crowds. It was awful. Never again.

Reply 72

angelpie

5

Dionysus

I don't think anyone's really suggesting it's ok to do uninvited, but if a girl is the one who initiates it, I see no problem.

But then how would a girl initiate it? If its by touching the guy then thats equally wrong.

Btw would looks matter? Even if the guy/girl in question is uber sleazy? Personally i think sleaze is sleaze-it makes the person ugly :biggrin:

Reply 73

Dionysus

15

angelpie

But then how would a girl initiate it? If its by touching the guy then thats equally wrong.

Btw would looks matter? Even if the guy/girl in question is uber sleazy? Personally i think sleaze is sleaze-it makes the person ugly :biggrin:

Believe me, I'm very happy for girls to come up and touch me, as long as they back off if I'm clearly not interested. I wouldn't expect it to work the other way around though.

Reply 74

quintsy

17

I think often it's in the nature of the person who does it, as opposed to being to do with the recipient's clothing. I suppose if you're wearing a very low cut top or short skirt, then people might get the wrong impression, but it's happened to me a few times- once when I was just trying to comfort my friend, so er, not at my most "provocative". :p:

Reply 75

jenren22

1

revolutionchild

Sorry if there's been threads on this before

Do you think, if a girl goes out clubbing, perhaps wearing a short skirt or lowish top, she is asking to be felt up? Maybe not even if wearing provocative clothes - just normal? I only ask because where I'm at uni, it seems that in all of our clubs the guys seem to think they can just walk up to a girl and grope her, and she won't mind.

I don't really drink, especially not in clubs (just don't like being out and drunk) but I do love to dance, so do go out quite a bit. Usually the group of friends I go with often pull random people (which I don't have a problem with) but it does mean I either dance by myself or have to find someone to dance with - but this really shouldn't the impression that I'm out on the pull! And yes - sometimes I do wear short skirts / sexy clothes out - because I like to, and it makes it more like night out!

I'm not really looking for a solution to this, as drunk boys will be drunk boys - but just the question - by going out to a club and dancing, do you think a girl can complain if she ends up getting groped?

Hey, i am exactly the same as you. And i often wonder that as well. I do try to dress sexy, but that's usually when im with my bf, so im not as likely to get felt up unless they want words from my bf. But when im with my mates i tend to just go for comfy stuff, not showing much flesh. It's funny though, the last time i went out i went with my bf and someone still slapped my arse, even though we were holding hands!!

And all my mates are mainly lads so most strangers think i have to be with at least one of them (even though im clearly not). So im kind of at an advantage in that way. I also tend to avoid sat and fri nights as you get most of the pervs out then. Especially where i go anyway.

Reply 76

Sandhu

2

Slap the pervs. :hmmm:

Reply 77

puppy

revolutionchild

Sorry if there's been threads on this before

Do you think, if a girl goes out clubbing, perhaps wearing a short skirt or lowish top, she is asking to be felt up? by going out to a club and dancing, do you think a girl can complain if she ends up getting groped?

Yes you can complain, I've had people thrown out of clubs for touching me in the past. I just tell the bouncers that they grabbed me and then they get chucked out. Seems fair to me. Alternatively if someone touches me they get a smack in the face, they touch me, I touch them. There is no way you should put up with that, random strangers should not be touching you without your consent, I don't care what you're wearing or what situation it's in.

Reply 78

naivesincerity

2

perpetual

I'd never do it personally, very degrading to women, it even irritates me when it's done to me - but I do think you are inviting it if you dress sexily.

Listen to Next Contestent by Nickleback for most guys views on the subject lol.

But usually, dress really sexy and guys will assume your looking to pick up that night -