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My boyfriend thinks he is polyamorous but has never tried it...

Okay so,
My partner is polyamorous I think, or he thinks so

I've always felt he was much more open to other people even being in a relationship. I know it's not all black and white and I would usually consider myself quite open. However, this has come as a shock for me and I'm not quite sure how to go about it.

It's quite emotional, so when he said he is interested in poly, all kinds of questions entered my head. We've had a few emotional conversations about it which has left us both fustrated. Recently, I've suggested he rejoin Tinder, maybe talk to some people and get a feel for it.
Obviously I'd rather it just be me and him, and I have no interest in others. One conversation would lead to him pleading with me that he wants me and couldn't do the poly life, which I could believe but I can't now trust that he can just 'switch off' them feelings. I want him to be who he wants to be at the end of the day, there's nothing worse than pretending to be something you're not. Thus, I suggested the Tinder thing...

I do feel like this has complicated a lot of things for me, and I've been trying to read so much on mono/poly relationships. Is it possible for someone to feel they are poly, then decide that its not them? I am scared that he will get a feel for it and realise that's his lifestyle. I don't know how I will feel at that point, but I want him to explore what he wants to do.
Anyone else out there had a similar experience?
Anyone who is poly out there who have had a mono relationship?
There's part of me that feels I've lost some of him, like I need to go out and do something for myself and distract me.
Do I let him explore this way of life or is this a recipe for disaster?

My minds a lil pickled right now, so not sure if all this makes sense
Reply 1
Avatar for JaseyB
JaseyB
15
I think you are on the right tracks in letting him be him. However it's totally upto you wether or not you stand by him or go your own way only you know if you can be comfortable with this way. Sorry not too much help.

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