My boyfriend is occasionally doing cocaine and I don't know what to do

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 4 years ago
#1
So my boyfriend (of 4 years) went to a rave for new years eve and had took coke (bare in mind he never took drugs and was extremely against it).. I never knew but had my suspicions, 2 months down the line I went through his phone (which is unacceptable and wrong I know) to find him messaging someone for coke.. I immediately confronted him, we had a few days break talk things through I said that drugs is a BIG NO and he has broken trust. He was going to away for that weekend then(This is feburary).
This week I found messages of him texting his "friends" for some coke which I confronted him again and he told me all the times he took it including the time he went away... I honestly don't know what to do because he totally went against my feelings and done it knowing it would hurt our relationship.. I really need advice please!!
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showaeski
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#2
Report 4 years ago
#2
It's not unusual or wrong for him to want to experiment. I'm also not surprised he wasn't keen on telling you if you're this possessive and controlling. Stop looking at his messages, it's you that is hurting the relationship. He doesn't have to tell you every detail of his life.
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aaabattery
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#3
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#3
Geez.. give the guy a break. What are you, his mother?
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DrawTheLine
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#4
Report 4 years ago
#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
So my boyfriend (of 4 years) went to a rave for new years eve and had took coke (bare in mind he never took drugs and was extremely against it).. I never knew but had my suspicions, 2 months down the line I went through his phone (which is unacceptable and wrong I know) to find him messaging someone for coke.. I immediately confronted him, we had a few days break talk things through I said that drugs is a BIG NO and he has broken trust. He was going to away for that weekend then(This is feburary).
This week I found messages of him texting his "friends" for some coke which I confronted him again and he told me all the times he took it including the time he went away... I honestly don't know what to do because he totally went against my feelings and done it knowing it would hurt our relationship.. I really need advice please!!
I personally would break up with him. Drugs, especially ones like cocaine, is a big deal breaker for me.
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username3832246
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#5
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#5
Sounds like he's becoming an addict. You should at least threaten to end it if he doesn't stop - at least then you'll also save his health as well as your relationship.
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SCIENCE :D
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#6
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#6
leave him be.

By the way did you not break his trust the moment you went through his phone?
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Anonymous #1
#7
Report Thread starter 4 years ago
#7
The thing is I've never been like this until I found out, I'm normally a easy going person, It's just drugs were always a no for both of us. QUOTE=showaeski;76820576]It's not unusual or wrong for him to want to experiment. I'm also not surprised he wasn't keen on telling you if you're this possessive and controlling. Stop looking at his messages, it's you that is hurting the relationship. He doesn't have to tell you every detail of his life.[/QUOTE]
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Anonymous #1
#8
Report Thread starter 4 years ago
#8
To make things clear I am not possessive or controlling he is free to do what he wants, our relationship was very healthy until drugs became a problem , drugs have always been a no to the both of us. When I found out I give him the opportunity to be single and do that stuff if it pleases him- he's been my bestfriend before my bf and i would try to respect and understand his decision because we do love each other.
I done what i done cause I was feeling insecure about not knowing the truth I know i was doing wrong there is no excuses..we have both distrusted each other and are both willing to work things out. QUOTE=Anonymous;76818182]So my boyfriend (of 4 years) went to a rave for new years eve and had took coke (bare in mind he never took drugs and was extremely against it).. I never knew but had my suspicions, 2 months down the line I went through his phone (which is unacceptable and wrong I know) to find him messaging someone for coke.. I immediately confronted him, we had a few days break talk things through I said that drugs is a BIG NO and he has broken trust. He was going to away for that weekend then(This is feburary).
This week I found messages of him texting his "friends" for some coke which I confronted him again and he told me all the times he took it including the time he went away... I honestly don't know what to do because he totally went against my feelings and done it knowing it would hurt our relationship.. I really need advice please!![/QUOTE]
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shoethetabs
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#9
Report 4 years ago
#9
The guys telling you to leave him be are being unfair. Yes, it was wrong of you to go behind his back and check his messages, but now that you have found that he is engaging in illegality despite your express request that he doesn't, you should tell him that you'll leave him if he doesn't stop completely, and leave him if he refuses. Yes, you should leave him be for most of his personal habits, but class A drugs are hardly a small quirk.
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