Racist Arab parents ? Algerian/Turkish/Syrian Watch

Anonymous #1
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My parents are Arab , Muslim . My mum is Algerian/Turkish and my dad is Syrian . I’m 18 and I’ve known my crush for a long time . We really like eachother and he’s so sweet and mature . The problem is he’s black , he is Portuguese/Jamaican. My father is now coming to terms that I am old enough to date as before it was very strict but I was still talking to this boy ( friendly way ) , my dad told me I can date who I want as long as he’s a Muslim and Arab . He said if I bring someone home that is not Muslim Arab he will disown me and I can never ask him for help. My dad was very serious and has always been so I’m very sure he will not tolerate me bringing this boy home . Also , the boy had been kicked out of school because of a fight ( which he is not to blame) therefore has no qualifications and just works in a local shop. His parents are quite wealthy but he is not . On the other hand I’m highly educated, and my father is very had working just like his family but my crush himself is nothing like me . My dad wants me to go for someone that can look after me and be able to provide for the family , basically a higher job instead of just working in a local shop ( even though I’ll work myself ) . I really don’t know what to do ?

There is also this other guy that I used to like during my childhood and he fits the criteria perfectly. He is very smart and highly educated ( even more than me ) and is Arab Muslim . He also has so much to offer and my dad will LOVE HIM . But the only problem is I’m not in contact with this boy anymore as I used to be madly in love with him and I had to concentrate on school so I deleted him off everything. We told eachother we’d find eachother later and have a halal relationship ( marriage ) .

I’m stuck inbeteeen these 2 guts and I really do like the 2 nd one more but I’m speaking to the 1st one currently and do not know what the 2nd one is up to .
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cemsu
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i would say that go after the one you love but if it will cost you family find someone that you will love and also your parents will like. You may have some cultural differences in the future that may result in a bad relationship. However it may not mean that you should start talking to the another guy. Wait for someone that fits your criteria. You have plenty of time to find the right guy.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My parents are Arab , Muslim . My mum is Algerian/Turkish and my dad is Syrian . I’m 18 and I’ve known my crush for a long time . We really like eachother and he’s so sweet and mature . The problem is he’s black , he is Portuguese/Jamaican. My father is now coming to terms that I am old enough to date as before it was very strict but I was still talking to this boy ( friendly way ) , my dad told me I can date who I want as long as he’s a Muslim and Arab . He said if I bring someone home that is not Muslim Arab he will disown me and I can never ask him for help. My dad was very serious and has always been so I’m very sure he will not tolerate me bringing this boy home . Also , the boy had been kicked out of school because of a fight ( which he is not to blame) therefore has no qualifications and just works in a local shop. His parents are quite wealthy but he is not . On the other hand I’m highly educated, and my father is very had working just like his family but my crush himself is nothing like me . My dad wants me to go for someone that can look after me and be able to provide for the family , basically a higher job instead of just working in a local shop ( even though I’ll work myself ) . I really don’t know what to do ?

There is also this other guy that I used to like during my childhood and he fits the criteria perfectly. He is very smart and highly educated ( even more than me ) and is Arab Muslim . He also has so much to offer and my dad will LOVE HIM . But the only problem is I’m not in contact with this boy anymore as I used to be madly in love with him and I had to concentrate on school so I deleted him off everything. We told eachother we’d find eachother later and have a halal relationship ( marriage ) .

I’m stuck inbeteeen these 2 guts and I really do like the 2 nd one more but I’m speaking to the 1st one currently and do not know what the 2nd one is up to .
My parents are Moroccan. There would never let me date anyone expect an Arab. Personally I like this idea. I think you should stick to our own race.
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Anonymous #2
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Just get an Arab guy. You will find someone who is Arab and like. You never just love one person really. There are so many options.
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KenGosgrove
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My parents are Arab , Muslim . My mum is Algerian/Turkish and my dad is Syrian . I’m 18 and I’ve known my crush for a long time . We really like eachother and he’s so sweet and mature . The problem is he’s black , he is Portuguese/Jamaican. My father is now coming to terms that I am old enough to date as before it was very strict but I was still talking to this boy ( friendly way ) , my dad told me I can date who I want as long as he’s a Muslim and Arab . He said if I bring someone home that is not Muslim Arab he will disown me and I can never ask him for help. My dad was very serious and has always been so I’m very sure he will not tolerate me bringing this boy home . Also , the boy had been kicked out of school because of a fight ( which he is not to blame) therefore has no qualifications and just works in a local shop. His parents are quite wealthy but he is not . On the other hand I’m highly educated, and my father is very had working just like his family but my crush himself is nothing like me . My dad wants me to go for someone that can look after me and be able to provide for the family , basically a higher job instead of just working in a local shop ( even though I’ll work myself ) . I really don’t know what to do ?

There is also this other guy that I used to like during my childhood and he fits the criteria perfectly. He is very smart and highly educated ( even more than me ) and is Arab Muslim . He also has so much to offer and my dad will LOVE HIM . But the only problem is I’m not in contact with this boy anymore as I used to be madly in love with him and I had to concentrate on school so I deleted him off everything. We told eachother we’d find eachother later and have a halal relationship ( marriage ) .

I’m stuck inbeteeen these 2 guts and I really do like the 2 nd one more but I’m speaking to the 1st one currently and do not know what the 2nd one is up to .
I'm a black guy and you should leave him.

Firstly, getting kicked out is already a massive red flag but when you combine that with: the stereotypes that swirl around any black guy and the racist views of Arabs : it's game over.

Secondly, why should anyone feel ashamed about what they are (their ethnicity). Ideally, he should leave you that is.... if he had any self-respect. Me ,personally , would never allow myself to be tolerated instead of celebrated.

Truth be told, black guys are completely incompatible with your culture and your family. And, what i'm about to say will trigger people but so be it:

Black guys should be used and are used for sexual, short-term flings and not anything long term. If you can compartmentalise, proceed. If not, leave, not just this black guy but all black guys because the rules won't change.
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FrankGary
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You don't need a guy yet. Wait until you are financially stable and then get another financially stable guy(that way your parents won't say much). Also, given that your parents are arab/muslim I don't think a black guy is what they were hoping for. From my experience, blacks and arabs don't mix well.
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FrankGary
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(Original post by KenGosgrove)
I'm a black guy and you should leave him.

Firstly, getting kicked out is already a massive red flag but when you combine that with: the stereotypes that swirl around any black guy and the racist views of Arabs : it's game over.

Secondly, why should anyone feel ashamed about what they are (their ethnicity). Ideally, he should leave you that is.... if he had any self-respect. Me ,personally , would never allow myself to be tolerated instead of celebrated.

Truth be told, black guys are completely incompatible with your culture and your family. And, what i'm about to say will trigger people but so be it:

Black guys should be used and are used for sexual, short-term flings and not anything long term. If you can compartmentalise, proceed. If not, leave, not just this black guy but all black guys because the rules won't change.
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KenGosgrove
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(Original post by FrankGary)
why doubt?
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by KenGosgrove)

Ideally, he should leave you that is.... if he had any self-respect.

Black guys should be used and are used for sexual, short-term flings and not anything long term. If you can compartmentalise, proceed. If not, leave, not just this black guy but all black guys because the rules won't change.
Wow...do YOU have any self respect? I would guess not since you're nothing but a mere sex toy!
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KenGosgrove
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(Original post by FrankGary)
You don't need a guy yet. Wait until you are financially stable and then get another financially stable guy(that way your parents won't say much). Also, given that your parents are arab/muslim I don't think a black guy is what they were hoping for. From my experience, blacks and arabs don't mix well.
Lets be real here. For the most part, black men do not mix well, long term, with any race of woman- even other black women.

I do not know why that is but it is.

Once again I am black, half east african, half french west indies.
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KenGosgrove
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Wow...do YOU have any self respect? I would guess not since you're nothing but a mere sex toy!
Once again with the person attacks.

Listen.

In an ideal world, I would love to marry a woman I cared for regardless of race or religion.

However, this is real life. People get killed for choosing the wrong partner.

Listen, I can handle the parameters and rule of engagement. That is why I play that game. If the rules anger you, or you cant get play, don't enter the casino.

Marriage is where family comes into play in a big way. Casual sex can quite easily remain between two consenting adults. The day culture or religion can produce a force field preventing physical intimacy you be sure to let me know.

P.S. I am more than toy. I'm a qualified doctor, guitarist and speak three languages. However, to certain cultures I'm still the missing link between gorilla and modern day human. This is the reality that any black male with an IQ >100 has to deal with.
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~scorpio~
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My parents are Arab , Muslim . My mum is Algerian/Turkish and my dad is Syrian . I’m 18 and I’ve known my crush for a long time . We really like eachother and he’s so sweet and mature . The problem is he’s black , he is Portuguese/Jamaican. My father is now coming to terms that I am old enough to date as before it was very strict but I was still talking to this boy ( friendly way ) , my dad told me I can date who I want as long as he’s a Muslim and Arab . He said if I bring someone home that is not Muslim Arab he will disown me and I can never ask him for help. My dad was very serious and has always been so I’m very sure he will not tolerate me bringing this boy home . Also , the boy had been kicked out of school because of a fight ( which he is not to blame) therefore has no qualifications and just works in a local shop. His parents are quite wealthy but he is not . On the other hand I’m highly educated, and my father is very had working just like his family but my crush himself is nothing like me . My dad wants me to go for someone that can look after me and be able to provide for the family , basically a higher job instead of just working in a local shop ( even though I’ll work myself ) . I really don’t know what to do ?

There is also this other guy that I used to like during my childhood and he fits the criteria perfectly. He is very smart and highly educated ( even more than me ) and is Arab Muslim . He also has so much to offer and my dad will LOVE HIM . But the only problem is I’m not in contact with this boy anymore as I used to be madly in love with him and I had to concentrate on school so I deleted him off everything. We told eachother we’d find eachother later and have a halal relationship ( marriage ) .

I’m stuck inbeteeen these 2 guts and I really do like the 2 nd one more but I’m speaking to the 1st one currently and do not know what the 2nd one is up to .
My advice, cut off contact with the first guy until he sorts his life out. Think about your future girl. Would you want to be with someone who can't afford your bread and butter. He has a long way to go, firstly tell him you care about him and don't want to distract him so that he can get himself a decent education and then secure a job. If he likes you he will be motivated to work his socks off. It's easier said than done but you will feel great once you cut off contact. Out of sight is out of mind.

Focus on yourself firstly, then when you are ready to get to know a guy, don't be afraid to initiate the contact first. Especially if he ticks all the boxes. Good luck
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xH.Mx
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My parents are Arab , Muslim . My mum is Algerian/Turkish and my dad is Syrian . I’m 18 and I’ve known my crush for a long time . We really like eachother and he’s so sweet and mature . The problem is he’s black , he is Portuguese/Jamaican. My father is now coming to terms that I am old enough to date as before it was very strict but I was still talking to this boy ( friendly way ) , my dad told me I can date who I want as long as he’s a Muslim and Arab . He said if I bring someone home that is not Muslim Arab he will disown me and I can never ask him for help. My dad was very serious and has always been so I’m very sure he will not tolerate me bringing this boy home . Also , the boy had been kicked out of school because of a fight ( which he is not to blame) therefore has no qualifications and just works in a local shop. His parents are quite wealthy but he is not . On the other hand I’m highly educated, and my father is very had working just like his family but my crush himself is nothing like me . My dad wants me to go for someone that can look after me and be able to provide for the family , basically a higher job instead of just working in a local shop ( even though I’ll work myself ) . I really don’t know what to do ?

There is also this other guy that I used to like during my childhood and he fits the criteria perfectly. He is very smart and highly educated ( even more than me ) and is Arab Muslim . He also has so much to offer and my dad will LOVE HIM . But the only problem is I’m not in contact with this boy anymore as I used to be madly in love with him and I had to concentrate on school so I deleted him off everything. We told eachother we’d find eachother later and have a halal relationship ( marriage ) .

I’m stuck inbeteeen these 2 guts and I really do like the 2 nd one more but I’m speaking to the 1st one currently and do not know what the 2nd one is up to .
All I can say if follow your heart if you love the Jamaican guy don’t let yourself get married to a boy you don’t love for your fathers sake this is your life .if I was in your situation I would take the chance ,if I get disowned for love then so be it . But others can say family comes first ,still this is your desicion and your dad sounds like he cares for you and just wants what’s best .
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ikra.m
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As others have said, if you have even a slighetst interest on someone your parents would apporve of, go for him instead. Dont make your life difficult for no reason lol
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k.n.h.
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(Original post by KenGosgrove)
Black guys should be used and are used for sexual, short-term flings and not anything long term. If you can compartmentalise, proceed. If not, leave, not just this black guy but all black guys because the rules won't change.
??
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KenGosgrove
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(Original post by k.n.h.)
??
I mean ...lets be real...

I never, ever see black men in relationships with arabs or south asians in daylight but I know a few who have had sex with them. So that's the role for the black male in this society with those type of women.

Sex and not marriage.

Its a case of, you cant have your cake and eat it too.

You can screw black guys but can't have a relationship with one. Mixing the two can lead to danger and social ostracism.
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JhonTron
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The Jamaican guy sounds like nothing but trouble, leave him
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k.n.h.
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(Original post by KenGosgrove)
I mean ...lets be real...

I never, ever see black men in relationships with arabs or south asians in daylight but I know a few who have had sex with them. So that's the role for the black male in this society with those type of women.

Sex and not marriage.

Its a case of, you cant have your cake and eat it too.

You can screw black guys but can't have a relationship with one. Mixing the two can lead to danger and social ostracism.
I'm pretty sure you said black guys should be used and are used for sexual, short-term flings, I interpreted that that statement applied to all races, not just differing races to blacks.
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