'Nice guy' helping

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 2 years ago
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When a girl 'vents' or feels comfortable enough to talke about an issue she is having with you, is it best to try offer solutions and ways to make things better? Or are they usually just looking for someone to be there for them? Obviously I don't want to disregard shared problems but equally not wanting to fall into the 'nice guy' descriptor.
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Yakib
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#2
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Both the former and the latter.
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NonIndigenous
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#3
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Something like this:

https://youtu.be/RzB9L0SZjbI?t=1m33s
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Hiraeth.
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(Original post by NonIndigenous)
Something like this:

https://youtu.be/RzB9L0SZjbI?t=1m33s
Exactly this^
The girl made a mistake here. Girls don't vent to boys.
Don't give them solutions, just give them attention.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Yakib)
Both the former and the latter.
(Original post by NonIndigenous)
Something like this:

https://youtu.be/RzB9L0SZjbI?t=1m33s
(Original post by Hiraeth.)
Exactly this^
The girl made a mistake here. Girls don't vent to boys.
Don't give them solutions, just give them attention.
Easier to just give them a hug if it's in person, no problem but if it's a call or message then I am not really sure what to say that is of comfort tbh
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Yakib)
Both the former and the latter.
At present I usually do both, a lot of the time though it'll be something where there's no clear solution and that is the problem though so me saying things will not be helpful.
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username3741972
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You do both
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Jheinexx)
You do both
And when the very reason there is a problem is that there is no clear solution? Is it not better to just try to comfort sometimes than offer solutions that have obviously been tried or just wouldn't work because the problem is a sensitive one?
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iElvendork
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Unless they say the phrase "what should I do?" just listen to them rant
Honestly, as a girl who likes to just rant, offering advice when they don't want it will just make them more angry, and angry at you
Most of the time girls don't want people to necessarily 'fix things' they just want to rant for a bit
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by iElvendork)
Unless they say the phrase "what should I do?" just listen to them rant
Honestly, as a girl who likes to just rant, offering advice when they don't want it will just make them more angry, and angry at you
Most of the time girls don't want people to necessarily 'fix things' they just want to rant for a bit
Yeah that's fair and what my reservations were for offering what to do. 'Can't imagine what you're going through..', 'That must be really tough, I think you've been really strong so far to be dealing with it for so long', 'Not fair that you have to go through this, if you ever need to talk more I am always here for you'.

Stuff like that fine?

Many thanks btw x
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