URGENT: Why is he avoiding me!?!?

Watch
Anonymous
#1
Report 3 years ago
#1
So a few months ago, a new girl joined my group of friends and she was incredibly sweet and caring- like a mother figure.

But everything went wrong when she met one of the guys we knew (who i used to talk to regularly on snapchat).

She became obsessed with him and started speaking to him regularly but then one day she came up to us crying saying "he doesn't want me because he heard a disgusting rumour about me"



A lot of other things were said too and we were all trying to comfort her (bear in mind she HAD ONLY KNOWN HIM FOR 2 WEEKS!)

We all found it a bit odd but didn't really think much of it.



Anyway, so she was showing us their messages and the conversation was quite dry, and we all commented saying that's not how he talks to us.

So she wanted to see our conversations- now i had saved our conversation on snapchat (shut up don't judge me it's hilarious) so she asked for my phone and i let her see a bit of it BUT SHE ENDED UP SCROLLING ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP AND READ THE ENTIRE THING.

My other friends were lucky she took so long that they deleted their conversations



(Btw, this guy is very friendly and makes flirty jokes with everyone so this made the girl jealous because he never spoke to her like that)

Anyway so THE POINT IS she saw my messages and i didn't have the guts to just take my phone off her because the girl was in tears and i felt bad for her.





FORWARD TO 3 WEEKS LATER



The guy and I had not spoken for a while. So I decided to send him a snap, and he sent back a short reply (which is very unlike him- he always banters around)

Whenever I saw him in person he wouldn't even look at me or say 'Hi' or ANYTHING which is also uncharacteristic (but he did with all the rest of my friends) so it's as if i don't exist. One time I did approach him while he was with some of my other friends and it was the most awkward interaction ever it still makes me cringe.



So today i said f*** it and approached him and we had a normal but short conversation. Then when I got home I replied to his story on snapchat and he replied "Lool"................................

......

.....

...

....

..

.

.

.

??????????????????????????????/

BTW: This guy is 23 and I'm 20 years old. We are in uni and he's honestly one of the people I never thought would mean so much to me (as a friend lol) but I really miss our conversations and I don't understand why he is acting so distant.

He's a mature guy and avoids confrontation and arguments so I don't really know if i should ask him to his face what's wrong because he will definitely deny it.

also, don't tell me i'm acting desperate- bc i've been waiting a hella long time between interactions LOOOOOOOOOOOOL ik this is sad but i really miss my friend.



>>>>>>>>>>>AND I THINK THAT THE GIRL WHO WAS OBSESSED WITH HIM TOLD HIM THAT SHE SAW MY CONVERSATION WITH HIM.



I really wanna know but i don't know if i should ask him or just leave it cuz after June I will probably never see him again.

But I still wish we could remain friends at least via snapchat and whatsapp (we have a group chat- which he 'coincidentally' never talks in anymore)
0
reply
Hopefully1
Badges: 12
Rep:
?
#2
Report 3 years ago
#2
Well, it seems obviously that she told him exactly what happened. As a drama queen (that what she seems like) she probably told him things she'd read etc. and questioned him on how he felt about her. Guessing she wanted more than just a friendship with him. He was probably shocked that you shared those messages with her feeling that those we kind of personal, even as friends, between the two of you. He clearly was never too interested in the new girl and your sharing the messages with her and his desire to distance himself from her all ended up being too much drama. He probably felt awkward about the whole situation too. So since he has now had a short conversation with you that at least felt normal you can work on extending the conversation next time. I'd distance myself from the new girl if possible..... unless you can really see her as a long term friend. As far as never seeing him again after June that is a possibility as he must be graduating but you can still remain snap-friends so try to gently resurrect the friendship. Keep in mind he's feeling sensitive right now but will most likely come back around if the new girl isn't there. I think this friendship is salvageable. IF he continues to act distant then..... depending on how good of friends you were with him in the first place..... you may just have to bring the whole thing up and have a calm conversation and explain to him directly what happened. Best of luck!
1
reply
Anonymous #1
#3
Report 3 years ago
#3
such is the life of a chad
0
reply
Anonymous #2
#4
Report 3 years ago
#4
(Original post by Hopefully1)
Well, it seems obviously that she told him exactly what happened. As a drama queen (that what she seems like) she probably told him things she'd read etc. and questioned him on how he felt about her. Guessing she wanted more than just a friendship with him. He was probably shocked that you shared those messages with her feeling that those we kind of personal, even as friends, between the two of you. He clearly was never too interested in the new girl and your sharing the messages with her and his desire to distance himself from her all ended up being too much drama. He probably felt awkward about the whole situation too. So since he has now had a short conversation with you that at least felt normal you can work on extending the conversation next time. I'd distance myself from the new girl if possible..... unless you can really see her as a long term friend. As far as never seeing him again after June that is a possibility as he must be graduating but you can still remain snap-friends so try to gently resurrect the friendship. Keep in mind he's feeling sensitive right now but will most likely come back around if the new girl isn't there. I think this friendship is salvageable. IF he continues to act distant then..... depending on how good of friends you were with him in the first place..... you may just have to bring the whole thing up and have a calm conversation and explain to him directly what happened. Best of luck!
Thankyou so much this was really helpful!!
And yeah a whole lot of crazy stuff went down where the girl became so obsessive she did a bunch of dangerous things and is now in therapy and everyone including the guy has cut her off.
I will try to build the friendship up again and i'm determined i really don't wanna lose him.
Thanks again 😊😊
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Are you tempted to change your firm university choice on A-level results day?

Yes, I'll try and go to a uni higher up the league tables (26)
28.26%
Yes, there is a uni that I prefer and I'll fit in better (9)
9.78%
No I am happy with my choice (51)
55.43%
I'm using Clearing when I have my exam results (6)
6.52%

Watched Threads

View All