I fell out with w a friend, but I miss her and also I have no other friends

IDK if people ask these kind of questions on student room but the yahoo answer word limit was to small. Read all this if you're bothered I just needed to get it off my chest:

I was like 2 peas in a pod with this girl. Lets call her Anne. But things went down hill when I felt a cold shoulder vibe from her. And then she acted very moody and unresponsive when our group hung out. But she is a very polite person so when you spoke to her it was like every thing was jolly. After about a month the friendship circle got busy.
But when we became free I tried to arrange different activities with her.

What she would do is tell me she wanted to go, but then cancel bc she was busy, and then a day later drop a huge hint that she wasn't busy and just didnt want to go.

E.g our group had planned to do a certain activity together in the future/ I asked Anne to go to the movies with me, she said she would, and then she said she was working, and then she tells me actually she and another girl did the planned group activity togethor. But drops it as if it's perfectly casual that they didnt tell us. (It would be different if the group hadn't planned to do it.)
This other girl was also a huge gossip, which made me anxious that due to the signals they probably got together to talk about me.


/ Or Id ask anne to go somewhere, she'd say shes too busy, and then she'd message me a few hours later saying she actually did feel like going now but not to do the activity, just bc she needed to go on a stroll or sth.

i learned from one of Anne's ex friends that this is what Anne did to her when she no longer wanted to be friends. I was hurt and also felt like she was wasting my time if she didnt want to be friends.

After this I couldn't treat Anne the same, when Anne realised I was being different she said to another girl "Oh Well I'll just make new friends then'' that was enough for me to feel no longer interested in our friendship either.

Later however she tried to talk it out, only she rejected even being capable of spreading negative energy that could affect someone else wrongly. And so we stopped being friends.

After that I went through a lot of difficulties like not passing first year of uni, not getting a job so financial hardship, a lot of job rejections. Through all of this I sort of became isolated from the group of friends, except for one who I thought was most genuine. but then I became super lonely, especially bc i didnt tell anyone that I failed first year.
I dont know if I will ever be able to make a good group of friends again.

Sometimes I wonder if I should message Anne and try to patch things up. I've only heard she hasn't been so happy since our parting either (but she still remains with the rest of the group so isn't as lonely as me, or in educational/financial trouble)

I feel like If I patched things up the whole group will reconnect again. I won't be so worried about being lonely for the rest of my life. But then I remember how Anne basically told my friend that she had lied about all our shared interests for no apparent reason.

I've just wanted to vent all this for over a year but have never been able to tell anyone I know.

IDK if people ask these kind of questions on student room but the yahoo answer word limit was to small. Read all this if you're bothered I just needed to get it off my chest:

I was like 2 peas in a pod with this girl. Lets call her Anne. But things went down hill when I felt a cold shoulder vibe from her. And then she acted very moody and unresponsive when our group hung out. But she is a very polite person so when you spoke to her it was like every thing was jolly. After about a month the friendship circle got busy.
But when we became free I tried to arrange different activities with her.

What she would do is tell me she wanted to go, but then cancel bc she was busy, and then a day later drop a huge hint that she wasn't busy and just didnt want to go.

E.g our group had planned to do a certain activity together in the future/ I asked Anne to go to the movies with me, she said she would, and then she said she was working, and then she tells me actually she and another girl did the planned group activity togethor. But drops it as if it's perfectly casual that they didnt tell us. (It would be different if the group hadn't planned to do it.)
This other girl was also a huge gossip, which made me anxious that due to the signals they probably got together to talk about me.


/ Or Id ask anne to go somewhere, she'd say shes too busy, and then she'd message me a few hours later saying she actually did feel like going now but not to do the activity, just bc she needed to go on a stroll or sth.

i learned from one of Anne's ex friends that this is what Anne did to her when she no longer wanted to be friends. I was hurt and also felt like she was wasting my time if she didnt want to be friends.

After this I couldn't treat Anne the same, when Anne realised I was being different she said to another girl "Oh Well I'll just make new friends then'' that was enough for me to feel no longer interested in our friendship either.

Later however she tried to talk it out, only she rejected even being capable of spreading negative energy that could affect someone else wrongly. And so we stopped being friends.

After that I went through a lot of difficulties like not passing first year of uni, not getting a job so financial hardship, a lot of job rejections. Through all of this I sort of became isolated from the group of friends, except for one who I thought was most genuine. but then I became super lonely, especially bc i didnt tell anyone that I failed first year.
I dont know if I will ever be able to make a good group of friends again.

Sometimes I wonder if I should message Anne and try to patch things up. I've only heard she hasn't been so happy since our parting either (but she still remains with the rest of the group so isn't as lonely as me, or in educational/financial trouble)

I feel like If I patched things up the whole group will reconnect again. I won't be so worried about being lonely for the rest of my life. But then I remember how Anne basically told my friend that she had lied about all our shared interests for no apparent reason.

I've just wanted to vent all this for over a year but have never been able to tell anyone I know.

I read it all once.

Imo you can try it, but it wont be the same. It feels like your friendship ran its course and she wont be friends unless she wants it to. If this is a uni friendship then a lot of friendships at the beginning are just acquaintances.

What worries me more is that you seem more concerned about friends than failing uni.

If the uni isnt right for you, then find another course and uni [assuming you can et a reasonable one] . That would wipe out first year grades and give you a chance/ not a guarantee of making new friends and a fresh start.

If the other person is to be believed then Anne has her methods and if you are on the wrong side, then you wont be treated fairly.

This happened to me when I was going to uni and the rest of my group wasn't. Personally I would say you will be better without them. If they are going to treat you like that now it won't change. But don't worry about not finding another set of friends. Because there will always be another group you will fit into!Xx

IDK if people ask these kind of questions on student room but the yahoo answer word limit was to small. Read all this if you're bothered I just needed to get it off my chest:

I was like 2 peas in a pod with this girl. Lets call her Anne. But things went down hill when I felt a cold shoulder vibe from her. And then she acted very moody and unresponsive when our group hung out. But she is a very polite person so when you spoke to her it was like every thing was jolly. After about a month the friendship circle got busy.
But when we became free I tried to arrange different activities with her.

What she would do is tell me she wanted to go, but then cancel bc she was busy, and then a day later drop a huge hint that she wasn't busy and just didnt want to go.

E.g our group had planned to do a certain activity together in the future/ I asked Anne to go to the movies with me, she said she would, and then she said she was working, and then she tells me actually she and another girl did the planned group activity togethor. But drops it as if it's perfectly casual that they didnt tell us. (It would be different if the group hadn't planned to do it.)
This other girl was also a huge gossip, which made me anxious that due to the signals they probably got together to talk about me.


/ Or Id ask anne to go somewhere, she'd say shes too busy, and then she'd message me a few hours later saying she actually did feel like going now but not to do the activity, just bc she needed to go on a stroll or sth.

i learned from one of Anne's ex friends that this is what Anne did to her when she no longer wanted to be friends. I was hurt and also felt like she was wasting my time if she didnt want to be friends.

After this I couldn't treat Anne the same, when Anne realised I was being different she said to another girl "Oh Well I'll just make new friends then'' that was enough for me to feel no longer interested in our friendship either.

Later however she tried to talk it out, only she rejected even being capable of spreading negative energy that could affect someone else wrongly. And so we stopped being friends.

After that I went through a lot of difficulties like not passing first year of uni, not getting a job so financial hardship, a lot of job rejections. Through all of this I sort of became isolated from the group of friends, except for one who I thought was most genuine. but then I became super lonely, especially bc i didnt tell anyone that I failed first year.
I dont know if I will ever be able to make a good group of friends again.

Sometimes I wonder if I should message Anne and try to patch things up. I've only heard she hasn't been so happy since our parting either (but she still remains with the rest of the group so isn't as lonely as me, or in educational/financial trouble)

I feel like If I patched things up the whole group will reconnect again. I won't be so worried about being lonely for the rest of my life. But then I remember how Anne basically told my friend that she had lied about all our shared interests for no apparent reason.

I've just wanted to vent all this for over a year but have never been able to tell anyone I know.