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I HATE University Life!
Everyone of my friends and family say that University is the "time of their lives"...but I really don't feel this, do others? 
I started the year pretty confidently, met a whole heap of people and went out (why do Universities only really do Clubbing nights!?)...made a lot of friends, but really, I've met no-one that I could see as a true friend, or someone I can just chill with and do things with often.
I'm not unpopular (not trying to be bigheaded!), but these friendships pretty much have no substance to them at all...I literally now just go to Lectures, eat and Hide away in the library trying to do work...and all I want to do is just leave, I hate being a loner...I've lost all my confidence this year, and I'm generally a pretty funny guy, but I think I've lost that too...
I started the year pretty confidently, met a whole heap of people and went out (why do Universities only really do Clubbing nights!?)...made a lot of friends, but really, I've met no-one that I could see as a true friend, or someone I can just chill with and do things with often.
I'm not unpopular (not trying to be bigheaded!), but these friendships pretty much have no substance to them at all...I literally now just go to Lectures, eat and Hide away in the library trying to do work...and all I want to do is just leave, I hate being a loner...I've lost all my confidence this year, and I'm generally a pretty funny guy, but I think I've lost that too...
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Maybe you just need to find something to make everything click into place again? Have you tried any socs or clubs? I prefer those as they don't do clubbing all the time.
aw that sucks!
Don't worry, I was kinda like that as well, I only really had my next door flatmate last year, and even then I didn't really know her that well!
On my course I just hung out with some group members, but they weren't really my crowd at all, so it was hard to even be myself around them.
This year I decided to just smile and say hello to any of my course people, it's really worked now, everyone knows I exist and I've met some really awesome people that I hang out with outside the course.
My flatmate turned out to be my real closest friend and we are rooming together this year as well.
Listen to what Hannah said - coz I joined up with some societies by myself this year and have made some amazing friends! The trick is to just be natural, talk to people and have some consistency in meeting them so that you develop a strong friendship
Don't worry, I was kinda like that as well, I only really had my next door flatmate last year, and even then I didn't really know her that well!
On my course I just hung out with some group members, but they weren't really my crowd at all, so it was hard to even be myself around them.
This year I decided to just smile and say hello to any of my course people, it's really worked now, everyone knows I exist and I've met some really awesome people that I hang out with outside the course.
My flatmate turned out to be my real closest friend and we are rooming together this year as well.
Listen to what Hannah said - coz I joined up with some societies by myself this year and have made some amazing friends! The trick is to just be natural, talk to people and have some consistency in meeting them so that you develop a strong friendship
you're not alone. I find that a lot of people at university are too shallow and my friends are mainly non uni folk. I much prefer treating uni as work than having a load of shallow connections. I just can't stand the whole lazy, think you're something special, lots of pocket money from mummy/daddy, over dressed *******s
Its all a bit of luck..
My first year; first semester i met lots of new people and was chatty but nothing more..
Second semester, everyone had formed little groups and it was kinda crap, so i buried myself in my work.
Start of the 2nd year, tried hard, joined lots of societies and stuff, was kinda like before, knew lots of people but wasnt that close still.. so that kinda sucked..
But then, at some point i became really good friends with some people off my course and now we spend waaay too much time together, but its the best!
Dont give up, its so worth it once you find them
My first year; first semester i met lots of new people and was chatty but nothing more..
Second semester, everyone had formed little groups and it was kinda crap, so i buried myself in my work.
Start of the 2nd year, tried hard, joined lots of societies and stuff, was kinda like before, knew lots of people but wasnt that close still.. so that kinda sucked..
But then, at some point i became really good friends with some people off my course and now we spend waaay too much time together, but its the best!
Dont give up, its so worth it once you find them
yeah i feel exactly the same, not that its any help...except maybe the feeling not unpopular bit (although i wouldn't say i'm hated either)...my whole changed self perception I feel has made me into someone people probably wouldn't want to hang out with (whereas before with my friends I was a fun loving guy)...also i'm different as in I can't really work either cos im always thinking about this....o well! theres loads of hating uni threads here so you might find some useful advice there. Can't really advise as I'm in the same position but I feel for you. I think the main aim that you should prioritize is to feel better in your self first. Obviously that would help if you had friends, which would boost your confidence, but trying to take an attitude of taking things as they come and that you like the way you are and if other people don't like it that's their problem as long as your true to yourself. Also, I find as im thinking about it constantly with people it affects the way I act so also try stop thinking/worrying about it. Obviously Im still in the same situation so really how hard it is.
Its not you hate Uni life, you hate YOUR uni life.
Im the same, sitting in when flatmates go clubbing sometimes daily and have parties and though I want to have a good time they are drunk by 7pm or so each night then go out and drink more.
I want flatmates and friends who we can sit in living room watching tv/dvd play Xbox etc and go clubbing maybe once a week.
Its just annoying that im lonely as theres personality conflicts
Im the same, sitting in when flatmates go clubbing sometimes daily and have parties and though I want to have a good time they are drunk by 7pm or so each night then go out and drink more.
I want flatmates and friends who we can sit in living room watching tv/dvd play Xbox etc and go clubbing maybe once a week.
Its just annoying that im lonely as theres personality conflicts
Wow thanks for all the quick responses...I'm at QMUL.
I've joined a few societies, but none of them seem to EVER have any events, I go cricket too..but its pretty much the same with people there
Its not like I don't say hi to EVERYONE on my course, and my building etc, I just dunno why I don't really build any sort of relationship with anyone,
I guess there's something wrong...I'd pretty much say I only really have one close friend that I can talk to loads
I've joined a few societies, but none of them seem to EVER have any events, I go cricket too..but its pretty much the same with people there
Its not like I don't say hi to EVERYONE on my course, and my building etc, I just dunno why I don't really build any sort of relationship with anyone,
I guess there's something wrong...I'd pretty much say I only really have one close friend that I can talk to loads
I've heard so many stories of people at QMUL being really dissatisfied with Uni life there. I wonder why?
EarlHickey
Its not you hate Uni life, you hate YOUR uni life.
Im the same, sitting in when flatmates go clubbing sometimes daily and have parties and though I want to have a good time they are drunk by 7pm or so each night then go out and drink more.
I want flatmates and friends who we can sit in living room watching tv/dvd play Xbox etc and go clubbing maybe once a week.
Its just annoying that im lonely as theres personality conflicts
Im the same, sitting in when flatmates go clubbing sometimes daily and have parties and though I want to have a good time they are drunk by 7pm or so each night then go out and drink more.
I want flatmates and friends who we can sit in living room watching tv/dvd play Xbox etc and go clubbing maybe once a week.
Its just annoying that im lonely as theres personality conflicts
Pretty much the same feeling really! Well theres a few in my flat that don't go out much, but are personalities really are totally different, and to be honest, they're pretty bitchy towards others..which is something I CANNOT deal with! lol.
Really annoys me, I'd just love to have a group of 4 or 5 friends that are "life" friends...instead of having like 80 odd at University that aren't close or anything
Thanks to everyone, your warm responses are great
there are people/threads on here about QMUL and a lot of people seem to have the same problem, it might be london unis and the way there are? for me personally when i was visiting unis i found the ones up north to be so much more friendly than london ones, and growing up in london i do think theres a big difference in attitude to the rest of the uk.
all i can say is i hope your situation improves, its good that you talk to people its just close friendships you lack? maybe out of the people you talk to figure out the ones you get on with most and try spending more time with them?
all i can say is i hope your situation improves, its good that you talk to people its just close friendships you lack? maybe out of the people you talk to figure out the ones you get on with most and try spending more time with them?
Anonymous
Wow thanks for all the quick responses...I'm at QMUL.
I've joined a few societies, but none of them seem to EVER have any events, I go cricket too..but its pretty much the same with people there
Its not like I don't say hi to EVERYONE on my course, and my building etc, I just dunno why I don't really build any sort of relationship with anyone,
I guess there's something wrong...I'd pretty much say I only really have one close friend that I can talk to loads
I've joined a few societies, but none of them seem to EVER have any events, I go cricket too..but its pretty much the same with people there
Its not like I don't say hi to EVERYONE on my course, and my building etc, I just dunno why I don't really build any sort of relationship with anyone,
I guess there's something wrong...I'd pretty much say I only really have one close friend that I can talk to loads
I think that it's just QMUL; I can't stand it either.
Raz
if you have a close friend already it cant be that bad. I mean surely theres nothing wrong with having a few people you are really close to?
I think everyone kinda drifts about looking for their friend circle in first year.
Hmm.. well you sound a bit like me coz I don't really go clubbing, and as an alternative I go shopping, go to the cinema, ice skating, dinners etc
I guess you have to just put it out there really like: so what are you doing this weekend? And if they say nothing much, or really anything! - just say: oh I'm just going for a movie care to join?
It's just simple things like that that start off a friendship really.
Hmm.. well you sound a bit like me coz I don't really go clubbing, and as an alternative I go shopping, go to the cinema, ice skating, dinners etc
I guess you have to just put it out there really like: so what are you doing this weekend? And if they say nothing much, or really anything! - just say: oh I'm just going for a movie care to join?
It's just simple things like that that start off a friendship really.
brightxburns
I've heard so many stories of people at QMUL being really dissatisfied with Uni life there. I wonder why?
I quite like it as a whole here, I just hate how I've built no real friendships at all.. I suppose I've been clumped with a whole heap of people, and a whole building of people that I have nothing in common with
and they're all pretty introvert.I can have days/nights that I do enjoy myself with people from my course etc...it's always few and far between though...and pretty much everything seems to centre around clubbing
What have you heard?
nikki14
snap!
Precisely.... and I don't think its just London Uni's... you don't hear anywhere near as many people moaning about UCL/KCL/Imperial/LSE/SOAS/etc
I think it is just QMUL
brightxburns
I've heard so many stories of people at QMUL being really dissatisfied with Uni life there. I wonder why?
Because it's ghastly...
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