Need help breaking out of the friend zone Watch

J_MR
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#1
Report Thread starter 9 months ago
#1
..
Last edited by J_MR; 3 months ago
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Spamelie
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#2
Report 9 months ago
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Oh dear, that's not a fun one!
Ummmm...well, start by letting her know you're available. Plant the seed.

You have two options really:
Try to prevent them getting together and hope she goes for you instead. (shady stuff)
Stay out of it and let the chips fall where they may.

Although, the first idea is simple but probably quite morally wrong.
First off, find out if this friend is also into her and go from there really. you know how crushes are; if she's serious, she won't give up on the friend without a fight. I would tread carefully, but start dropping hints that you like her into conversation...it can't hurt, right?
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Tootles
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#3
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(Original post by J_MR)
So there's this girl and she really fancies a close friend of mine, the problem is I really fancy her, and IDK What to do because she tells me all this stuff as if I'm her best friend... She even said, "Oh I wish I could find a guy like you"... Is it a wild goose chase to pursue this? What do I do?!
Yes. If she was interested in you at all, she'd be saying "oh you'd be a great partner".
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J_MR
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#4
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Tbh the only reason I'm considering it is that he's being a bit of a **** to her like leading her on and stuff. Idk it's just I really like her and I'd hate to lose her completely...

(Original post by Spamelie)
Oh dear, that's not a fun one!
Ummmm...well, start by letting her know you're available. Plant the seed.

You have two options really:
Try to prevent them getting together and hope she goes for you instead. (shady stuff)
Stay out of it and let the chips fall where they may.

Although, the first idea is simple but probably quite morally wrong.
First off, find out if this friend is also into her and go from there really. you know how crushes are; if she's serious, she won't give up on the friend without a fight. I would tread carefully, but start dropping hints that you like her into conversation...it can't hurt, right?
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Spamelie
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#5
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(Original post by J_MR)
Tbh the only reason I'm considering it is that he's being a bit of a **** to her like leading her on and stuff. Idk it's just I really like her and I'd hate to lose her completely...

True, true.
And if you're happy just being her friend, then why not leave it that way? But if she wants your advice, tell her honestly what you think about this guy and the way he behaves. Even if you didn't like her, I'd probably suggest that.
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AJ1NS
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#6
Report 9 months ago
#6
tbh there's no friendzone , with that out of the way..
it's best to just let her do what she wants, interfering with this is bad not only for your friendship but possible romantic relationship :'/
i'd just try asking her to hang out with you more and talking about more deep topics like ideal partners maybe ? just try to get close to her
and flirt a little, it'll be fine.
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Anonymous #1
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Report 9 months ago
#7
Girls put you in the friend zone when you're not confident or masculine enough for them (harsh but true). You're probably too nice to her and she sees you as a gay best friend type. Pull back a little, let her see you as a confident man who has plenty of options. She just needs to see you in a different light. Be a bit cheekier, a bit more laddy, a bit of a tw a t. Flirt occasionally but quite nonchalantly. Don't be too soppy and nice. There's a reason why she's more attracted to this bad boy behaviour from your friend. Obviously you don't need to be a d*ck but stop being her lapdog. Maybe mention a girl you think is fit. She might get a bit jealous.
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bones-mccoy
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#8
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If she clearly only likes you as a friend, leave it at that. Find someone who does feel the same way. You don't want to mess up a perfectly good friendship.
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fallen_acorns
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#9
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move on. It will just waist your time.

I have seen people - including myself - break out of the 'friendzone' - it is entirely possible. But the relationship that comes from it is doomed in the long term.

Why? Because they are built on a foundation of: 'friends + a bit more excitement' - after the excitement fades, which it always will.. what are you left with? friends. And one side, who ever realises it first, will have to do the whole explanation 'I think we were actually just better as friends all along'

your much better off just finding a realtionship that starts with a spark - that starts with the romance.. yes the close bond will form later, but it will not be the same bond as a 'best friend', it will be just as close, but the fact that the foundations are built on romance and love, rather then friendship - will show in the long term. When you go through difficult times and struggles and you fall back in your minds to how your romance formed, you will be reminded of love, not of a best friend.

I have had both - my first long-term relationship, was with my best friend and it lasted 3 years. Now I am married to my wife - we were never friends, we met, knew each other for a couple of weeks.. fell in love, dated, became a couple, got engaged, got married etc. We have never been friends or best friends - and when you have done both, you can tell the difference, its huge and its important.
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Analyst89
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#10
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#10
I was friend zoned by a girl long time ago but won her back:

-find out what sort of guys she likes attractive
-be friends, friendly to her friends
-go to the gym, dress well etc
-don't keep looking at her, just socialist and have fun
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