Parents and Islam Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 11 months ago
#1
Okay, I've posted threads before, I'm 17 year old muslim, and I've been constatnly threatened to be kicked out house when im 18. Now, the reason is outrageous. I talk back. And when I talk back they find it insulting that i tell them they are wrong. They cry etc about it. My parents are strict, I have never had a phone before, wifi had restiction (no games no facebook twitter, no youtube), and this is all becuase I mess up on one grade. I can't believe it myself. I did my AS and have A's so far. I just wanted to know

does this happen to you, or is my family overly strict
and what are my duties as a 17 year teenager male to my parents.

I do not swear at them, fight with them etc. I shout sometimes like every teenager does.

Also what my parents duties to me in Islam. I mean, they feed m and give me shelter (and brag about it), but I don't get those extra/ other stuff, like phones games facebook twitter etc). I am told when I am or am not allowed to go to friends house( haven't been for a year now).
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Anonymous #2
#2
Report 11 months ago
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
Okay, I've posted threads before, I'm 17 year old muslim, and I've been constatnly threatened to be kicked out house when im 18. Now, the reason is outrageous. I talk back. And when I talk back they find it insulting that i tell them they are wrong. They cry etc about it. My parents are strict, I have never had a phone before, wifi had restiction (no games no facebook twitter, no youtube), and this is all becuase I mess up on one grade. I can't believe it myself. I did my AS and have A's so far. I just wanted to know

does this happen to you, or is my family overly strict
and what are my duties as a 17 year teenager male to my parents.

I do not swear at them, fight with them etc. I shout sometimes like every teenager does.

Also what my parents duties to me in Islam. I mean, they feed m and give me shelter (and brag about it), but I don't get those extra/ other stuff, like phones games facebook twitter etc). I am told when I am or am not allowed to go to friends house( haven't been for a year now).
Are you sure your not in a prison?
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GreenSpoon125
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#3
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That's not alright, and certainly not normal in my area.
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Anonymous #1
#4
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#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
Are you sure your not in a prison?
Everyone gives me the same response. I get fed and shelter. TI live in a pretty big house, and my dad has nice cars. But all of the above occurs. Is this fair compared to the average teenager, (they seem to think that it's m ade up by the cars that i never go in and the size of the house that id give two **** about).
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Mesopotamian.
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#5
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How is this relevant to Islam?
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Samama.S
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#6
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Okay, I've posted threads before, I'm 17 year old muslim, and I've been constatnly threatened to be kicked out house when im 18. Now, the reason is outrageous. I talk back. And when I talk back they find it insulting that i tell them they are wrong. They cry etc about it. My parents are strict, I have never had a phone before, wifi had restiction (no games no facebook twitter, no youtube), and this is all becuase I mess up on one grade. I can't believe it myself. I did my AS and have A's so far. I just wanted to know

does this happen to you, or is my family overly strict
and what are my duties as a 17 year teenager male to my parents.

I do not swear at them, fight with them etc. I shout sometimes like every teenager does.

Also what my parents duties to me in Islam. I mean, they feed m and give me shelter (and brag about it), but I don't get those extra/ other stuff, like phones games facebook twitter etc). I am told when I am or am not allowed to go to friends house( haven't been for a year now).
I'm a 17 year old muslim and i don't have that issue with my parents they do get extremely disappointed when i get bad grades but are always optimistic, but congrats on the A's. i also get lectures on how lucky i am but then again i do have a phone and get to see friends. your parent child relation ship is not great. when it comes to friends have you tried inviting them to your house? also know that what your dealing with isnt normal.
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Anonymous #3
#7
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This might benefit you in the future. Just please them for now, then when you are ready, you can start your own life. Let this be a lesson. You will treat your kids inshallah. Have patience with your parents and Allah will have patience with you!
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Samama.S
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#8
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This might benefit you in the future. Just please them for now, then when you are ready, you can start your own life. Let this be a lesson. You will treat your kids inshallah. Have patience with your parents and Allah will have patience with you!
thats very good advice, no where did Allah say life was going to be fair.
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Anonymous #1
#9
Report Thread starter 11 months ago
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(Original post by Mesopotamian.)
How is this relevant to Islam?
I was asking, in islam, what are my duties at a 17 year old male.
and what are my parents duties
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Anonymous #1
#10
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#10
(Original post by Samama.S)
I'm a 17 year old muslim and i don't have that issue with my parents they do get extremely disappointed when i get bad grades but are always optimistic, but congrats on the A's. i also get lectures on how lucky i am but then again i do have a phone and get to see friends. your parent child relation ship is not great. when it comes to friends have you tried inviting them to your house? also know that what your dealing with isnt normal.
yh, not alowed to bring friends to house. Parents wont let me.
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Anonymous #1
#11
Report Thread starter 11 months ago
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This might benefit you in the future. Just please them for now, then when you are ready, you can start your own life. Let this be a lesson. You will treat your kids inshallah. Have patience with your parents and Allah will have patience with you!
Thank you.
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Anonymous #4
#12
Report 11 months ago
#12
(Original post by Anonymous)
Okay, I've posted threads before, I'm 17 year old muslim, and I've been constatnly threatened to be kicked out house when im 18. Now, the reason is outrageous. I talk back. And when I talk back they find it insulting that i tell them they are wrong. They cry etc about it. My parents are strict, I have never had a phone before, wifi had restiction (no games no facebook twitter, no youtube), and this is all becuase I mess up on one grade. I can't believe it myself. I did my AS and have A's so far. I just wanted to know

does this happen to you, or is my family overly strict
and what are my duties as a 17 year teenager male to my parents.

I do not swear at them, fight with them etc. I shout sometimes like every teenager does.

Also what my parents duties to me in Islam. I mean, they feed m and give me shelter (and brag about it), but I don't get those extra/ other stuff, like phones games facebook twitter etc). I am told when I am or am not allowed to go to friends house( haven't been for a year now).
Tell them to read the Quran. No one is perfect (apart from allah) so messing up one grade is not that bad. Ask them to be more kind to you :

"Verily Allah loves kindness in all things.” al-Bukhaari, 6024.

The great thing about islam is you can find a quote to justify anything, so get researching etc.. scholars/ quotes, and show them why their postiion is unjustified
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Mesopotamian.
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#13
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I was asking, in islam, what are my duties at a 17 year old male.
and what are my parents duties
Well in any religion, there should be mutual respect between parents and children. I suppose children should follow the rules that parents set, however, this doesn't mean that the parents can use this to become dictators. It seems that either your parents are way too strict or you're possibly not telling us the whole story. It's seems bizarre for a parent to threaten to kick their child out solely for arguing back.
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Anonymous #1
#14
Report Thread starter 11 months ago
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(Original post by Mesopotamian.)
Well in any religion, there should be mutual respect between parents and children. I suppose children should follow the rules that parents set, however, this doesn't mean that the parents can use this to become dictators. It seems that either your parents are way too strict or you're possibly not telling us the whole story. It's seems bizarre for a parent to threaten to kick their child out solely for arguing back.
I am mirupre pakistani. Parents come from strict background. My dad is money obeseed nd that's it. He switches off from family if you know what i mean. ALways on the phone. I'm just giving you some background.
I sometimes questoin, they CAN tho dictate my life. I own nothing. If i ask for something, they say no, i ask why, becuase they said and becuase it is theirs. They are those type of parents yuo CANNOT reaason with.
It's all their stuff that im asking for.
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Maryam.hannah
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#15
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I come from an extremely strict Muslim family. My parents check my phone, I’m 17 but I can’t google certain words. I tried to google “adult stem cells” the other day on my phone and it was blocked ): I am not allowed to talk to boys, let alone date.

I understand your struggles, trust me, I do. Depending on where you live, there are legal implications that can be taken into place. Social services can get involved if they feel that strict Islamic upbringing is being forced onto a child. Schools are now being taught to ask female students why they wear a hijab. If they respond “my parents told me to” then it must be reported, atleast in the UK. I know obviously a hijab isn’t forced onto you, but my point is legally your parents can’t force religion and culture onto you.

Islamically, there’s nothing that says you can’t go out with your friends. In actual fact, good companions and friends are encouraged, as long as they’re not female obviously.

I would try to reason with them. Give them Quran verses that prove your points, back them up with evidence so you’re not just arguing back, you’re actually educating them and providing facts.

Maybe moving out at 18 isn’t a bad thing. You can decide your own life. Have you tried getting a second phone and using this to use social media and stuff?? There are a lot of good Islamic lectures and sheikhs to follow on Twitter. Try and make them see the positives
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yusufmaududi
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#16
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#16
I don't doubt at all that your parents are not strict but you could also be acting in a not so cooperative manner as well which could be making the situation a bit worse .

I hope I don't sound like a spoil sport
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