Really jealous boyfriend Watch

Jinkies123
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#1
Report Thread starter 10 years ago
#1
I've been going out with my (long distance) boyfriend for about 3 months now, and he's amazing. I've never felt like this about anyone before, so it's all quite new to me

The problem is, he's awfully jealous over my ex, to the point where we're constantly arguing over it. He reckons he is just a rebound and doesn't hesitate to bring him up at any given oppurtunity. While I can understand him being jealous (me and my ex were together for nearly 18 months), he really does have no reason to be and the arguments are really starting to grind me down.

I really don't know what to do I really really don't want to break up with him, as he makes me so happy and he's more or less perfect apart from the arguing. I don't really know what I'm asking for, but any advice would be appreciated xx
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Mush
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#2
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He's insecure.

Do what you can to make him secure.

Do you see your ex a lot, does he live where you live? If so, then I'd definitely try to see him less - unless he's a key character in your life. If your bf knows that you never see your ex, he might be less likely to be irrationally jealous.
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This Is Not A Username
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Or the alternative to all those posts is to really give him an ultimatum, either he trusts you or you leave him, he will soon come round if he really loves you.
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RosiePosiePuddingAndPie
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Just be honest - tell him that you broke up with your ex for a reason, and by going on about your ex all the time, he's making you feel upset (or whatever he's making you feel). Maybe even explain that your ex is no threat to the relationship, but the way your current boyfriend keeps talking about you ex is. Hopefully he'd stop after that?
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death.drop
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#5
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hate to say it but with some guys you have to just have to accept it or move on.

the best you can do is explain that if you and your ex wanted to be together you would be. it didn't work out and you're not going back there. you want to be with him so you are.
but i expect you've already done that.
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22KT22
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#6
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Im assuming you've tried talking to him and explained that you are with him and its him you liked. try doing this again, explain that you like him etc but you cant deal with the arguing and that he's got to trust you. if you dont mind me asking, do you still talk to your ex/are you friends? i know its not really a good reason but it may explain why he feels the way he does.
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Henry G
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#7
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Comment from a guy's perspective ,my ex was excessively jealous, she drove me to distraction, texting at every opportunity, calling my friends, parents if she couldn't get hold of me, because I had mentioned that I had sent a Birthday card to a previous gf. She questioned me ad nauseam about this girl, so in the end she had to go, which was really tough because she was a really nice girl, no amount of reassurance would satisfy her, she's at Uni abroad now, so there was a natural solution.

Only thing that you can do is tell him that you aren't with him on the rebound and reassure him that it's him you want to be with and just hang in there I suppose?
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dita_parlo
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#8
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He needs to understand that you have a past, you can't change that, but you're with him and you're happy. Most people have ex's and this is gonna have to be something that he has to overcome. However, if you are constantly arguing over this issue then I don't know how well matched you are going to be together. I'm assuming you have mentioned this before and spoke to him about it? If so, and he's still being jealous, you do have to question the relationship IMO.
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Occiffer
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#9
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just talk to him about now. ts happening now.

its all about who your with now, not the past. he will trust you if he is right for you.
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