School counsellor Watch

Anonymous #1
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please keep anon or delete.

Just wondering, if i did go see the counseller person at my college, would they be able to tell anyone anything? As in teachers/tutor/parents, because i really wouldnt want anything to be said.
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ManOnTheMoon
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#2
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no it's all confidential - or should be
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[email protected]
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#3
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Only if they think you are a danger to yourself e.g. suicidal or (I think, don't quote me on it though) self-harm.
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No.666
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All depends on what you tell them. If you are carrying out an illegal act or are a danger to yourself they probably will tell someone else.
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ßlαcksωαn
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#5
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No, just dont tell them your suicide plans, I made that mistake :eek:
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death.drop
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It's up to their discretion but basically they need to have reason to believe you're in danger and telling someone else could mean you would be in less danger, or reason to believe you are putting someone else in danger.

For example, if you told them you'd been thinking about suicide they may not tell anyone but if you tell them you are seriously considering and planning suicide they probably would.
self harm isn't usually a reason to break confidentiality so you probably don't need to worry about that one.
if you were being sexually abused by a family member they would undoubtedly go to the police, but if you had been raped by a stranger they would advise you to go to the police but not do it for you.
they do not usually report illegal activity such as drug taking or underage drinking but they would report you if you were trafficking or had killed someone.

if you're talking usual teen issues like lying about having done coursework, having sex or issues with your parents then they have no reason to tell anyone anything.

hope that's made things a little clearer.
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Rhiannon-Mae
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(Original post by Anonymous)
please keep anon or delete.

Just wondering, if i did go see the counseller person at my college, would they be able to tell anyone anything? As in teachers/tutor/parents, because i really wouldnt want anything to be said.
if you are in any danger, eg. you are self harming, you want to kill yourself, you are being abused etc. they have a LEGAL OBLIGATION to pass this information on.
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Kabloomybuzz
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Not unles you or someone else is an danger or to do with terrorism. they shouldn't tell anyone about self har and will only tell anyone aobut suicide if you tell them you're actually going to doit
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Rhiannon-Mae
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#9
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(Original post by Kabloomybuzz)
Not unles you or someone else is an danger or to do with terrorism. they shouldn't tell anyone about self har and will only tell anyone aobut suicide if you tell them you're actually going to doit
legally they have to because "the person is in danger of harming themselves or others"

did a basic counselling course - we have to

also had counselling at school for a time, and they told HOY and parents about SH.
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Rhiannon-Mae)
legally they have to because "the person is in danger of harming themselves or others"

did a basic counselling course - we have to

also had counselling at school for a time, and they told HOY and parents about SH.
well in that case a lot of counsellers break the rules because i've told several counsellers i self harm and none of them told anyone.
I also spoke to one about how i'd been thinking about suicide a lot but that i wasn't going to do it and she didn't tell anyone because she didn't believe i'd do it.

I think experienced counsellers have more choice in what they do, whereas beginners are basically told to be on the safe side.
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Anonymous #3
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In theory, everything you say is confidential. In reality, as the previous posters have all suggested, it isn't.

Made the mistake of thinking that what I told a counsellor was confidential - turns out it wasn't, and she got social services and the police involved. If you're a danger to yourself, or to someone else, or are in danger (be it from self-harm, sexual abuse or suicide) most will tell the authorities - which they should. Some won't though.

If it's something you don't want someone in specific knowing, it might be worth asking your counsellor what it'll take for him/her to go to a higher authority?
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Rhiannon-Mae
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they should tell you when you first see them that:
"everything you say will stay between us, unless you tell me that you or someone else is in danger, in which case i will have to take it further, but i will discuss it with you before i do"

it's the first thing you should be told by them.
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Somewhat Damaged
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#13
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Yeah, if your a danger to yourself or others. That does include suicide, self harm.

erm, hallucinations which make you want to act out and hurt people. that kinda stuff.

terrorist attacks, telling them your going to go and beat someone up, etc.etc.

otherwise, yeah everything is supposed to be confidential.
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emilina
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#14
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i went to my school counsellor most of last year and she told me upfront she cant tell anyone anything apart from if she thinks im seriously troubled and need serious help of if she thinks im a danger to myself.
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Saffie
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#15
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I think it's up to the counsellor to use their own judgement over what constitutes 'being a danger to yourself'. Some services have policies to help make that decision. It's quite difficult to be on the end of it and asking "so how much can I say without you running to tell someone?" pretty much implies that someone should just be told.
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spicyred
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#16
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I'm have been chosen to be one of my school's counselor and my training starts on Tuesday. so far they told us that everything you say we have to keep confidential however if your at risk of hurting yourself, hurting others or being hurt by others than we have to tell senior members.
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Kabloomybuzz
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#17
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(Original post by Rhiannon-Mae)
they should tell you when you first see them that:
"everything you say will stay between us, unless you tell me that you or someone else is in danger, in which case i will have to take it further, but i will discuss it with you before i do"

it's the first thing you should be told by them.

It was, They followed to say "I wont tell anyone if you self harm unless its to the extent that you could accidentally or not take your life (aka down the road not across the street) if you feel suicidal I wont tell anyone unless you tell me youre going to do it"

I think it also depends on yourage. over 18 they have to respect your right to take your own life. Under 16 they will probably have to disclose more
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Anonymous #1
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Thanks guys.

i probably won't think about going now, just to be on the safe side.
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Kabloomybuzz
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#19
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I'm sorry its put you off. you should try it. You can ask what sort of things specifically they will and wont tell from the first session and go from there. COunselling can be really helpful
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Cirsium
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#20
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I reckon there must be different rules for different counsellors. When I did Drugs counselling type stuff I had to make the point that I was independent of the school and that our policy of confidentiality only didn't cover you or someone else being at risk of serious harm (the example was if you're using heroine I have to keep schtum but if you say you're going to OD then I can tell my boss - but still not the school or your rents) or if you were going to commit an act of terrorism
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