is it normal to feel disgusted after losing your virginity?
I recently lost my virginity to a close friend. So close in fact he wouldn't kiss or touch me. There was no foreplay. There was nothing hot about it in my opinion. I wasn't even turned on due to the lack of you know kissing and touching lol. The actual sex part was probably the worst. I was in pain the entire time (because you know your vagina doesn't stretch if you're not turned on lol) and I was biting my tongue with how badly it was hurting me. And the worst part? He busted. YEAH HE BUSTED. I didn't feel any sort of pleasure AT ALL and he BUSTED. So flash forward to now, every time I think of the experience I get a really disgusted feeling in my stomach. I'm glad to not be a virgin anymore but the fact that he wouldn't touch or kiss me while knowing he was taking my virginity makes me sick to my stomach and even slightly nauseous. Will this ever go away ? Is this a normal feeling?
Wow what a *****y way to lose your virginity. When I read the title I thought "what the hell is wrong with this person?", but now I see. There was no love, no connection, no intimacy, it was just him sticking his **** in you till he came. You had a bad experience, but don't let it hold you back from encounters with people with at least a bit of decency.
Sorry to hear that.
Lots of people are disappointed by their first time. For most it does go away and does not impact them in the long run.
I'd recommend people to have sex when they want sexual release or when they want to share intimacy with a romantic partner.
From the sounds of things neither of these was true for you. So I wouldn't have recommended it. Having sex because you 'want to lose your virginity' is a good sign that you shouldn't have sex.
No kissing or touching and doing it just to do it is a recipe for disappointment and a yuck feeling.
While technically you are not a virgin, I'd say for my definition of having a 'real' sexual experience; you still are. I say that because I believe it to be true but also in the hopes that you'll feel better about things and, in the future, pick your time, intention and partner better.
Don't overthink or worry about this. Better times are ahead.
Lots of people are disappointed by their first time. For most it does go away and does not impact them in the long run.
I'd recommend people to have sex when they want sexual release or when they want to share intimacy with a romantic partner.
From the sounds of things neither of these was true for you. So I wouldn't have recommended it. Having sex because you 'want to lose your virginity' is a good sign that you shouldn't have sex.
No kissing or touching and doing it just to do it is a recipe for disappointment and a yuck feeling.
While technically you are not a virgin, I'd say for my definition of having a 'real' sexual experience; you still are. I say that because I believe it to be true but also in the hopes that you'll feel better about things and, in the future, pick your time, intention and partner better.
Don't overthink or worry about this. Better times are ahead.
(edited 5 years ago)
Original post by Anonymous
I recently lost my virginity to a close friend. So close in fact he wouldn't kiss or touch me. There was no foreplay. There was nothing hot about it in my opinion. I wasn't even turned on due to the lack of you know kissing and touching lol. The actual sex part was probably the worst. I was in pain the entire time (because you know your vagina doesn't stretch if you're not turned on lol) and I was biting my tongue with how badly it was hurting me. And the worst part? He busted. YEAH HE BUSTED. I didn't feel any sort of pleasure AT ALL and he BUSTED. So flash forward to now, every time I think of the experience I get a really disgusted feeling in my stomach. I'm glad to not be a virgin anymore but the fact that he wouldn't touch or kiss me while knowing he was taking my virginity makes me sick to my stomach and even slightly nauseous. Will this ever go away ? Is this a normal feeling?
If you lost your virignity like that, then it would be normal to feel that way.
You decided to have sex for the sake of it, and not because it felt natural (based off your "glad to not be a virgin anymore" comment)- unfortunately regret is a common consequence when something like this happens.
I agree with others. Learn from your mistake but don't let it hold you back. Value yourself and your body. Don't let boys use it for personal relief, but also don't let one bad experience close you up (pardon the phrasing). Most people find their first time awkward or downright not pleasant. That's because they are not only inexperienced, but also try to rush into it out of curiosity.
Find a person that has a connection with you to learn about sex together, OR find an emotionally-mature person that had more experience and can show you what it should be like. Most importantly though; do it when it feels right. Not when others tell you the time is right.
Good luck, and keep your chin up. First times are rarely magical.
Find a person that has a connection with you to learn about sex together, OR find an emotionally-mature person that had more experience and can show you what it should be like. Most importantly though; do it when it feels right. Not when others tell you the time is right.
Good luck, and keep your chin up. First times are rarely magical.
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