Girlfriend staying at other guy's house.

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 12 years ago
#1
What it says on the tin really.

She says he's just a friend. I know she wouldn't go behind my back or anything but still think its weird :confused:

What are your opinions on this?
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Yoda
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#2
Report 12 years ago
#2
Do you trust her? Don't feel you must lie, it is better to admit that you don't than to fake that you do.
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Cherry Kisses
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#3
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#3
Do you trust her?
Do you know the guy?
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Fusion
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#4
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#4
Oldest trick in the book
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Ghost
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#5
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#5
I wouldn't feel right with it at all. But it would depend on the circumstances. Is it just him and her? If there are others there (preferably girls), then I'd feel a bit better with it.
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fleur de lis
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#6
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#6
If she's told you she's staying with him then perhaps it's cos she has nothing to hide? If you trust her then there shouldn't be an issue with it really, imo. I wouldn't mind my bf staying at someone else's house because I trust him.
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pendragon
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#7
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#7
Depending on the circumstances it can definitely be weird.

My ex visited me, and her bf was a short drive away in the same town (almost) and she proposed staying over at mine - which I thought was a bit odd - and her bf clearly did too (without meeting me at least, but I didnt particularly want to meet him for obvious reasons and she made it seem like he expected me to go and visit - read pay homage to - him at a time that best suited him rather than both meeting somewhere neutral) as they had an mobile argument in her car. Then she went and stayed with him. I dont blame the guy, I couldnt figure out what she was up to - talking to friends it was either: wanting to see us both together so she could kind of compare us in some way, or she was playing mind games with me or him, or both of us.

Now that was wierd, really put me off the idea of being friends.

Anyway, back to OP - if there is any history of attraction or dating then I think its too much, but otherwise its unreasonable to put up much of a fuss. Even though it is different for guys because we know that there are plenty of male friends of hers who probably think about your girlfriend naked all the time.
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Robob
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#8
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#8
What's wrong with it?

If he's just a mate it's fine.
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jenna_is_ace
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#9
Report 12 years ago
#9
If you trust her and she hasn't a history of being a cheat or whatever I reckon its fine.

When I go to visit my best friends (they live 3 hours away from where I now live & are both boys) I stay at one's house and sleep in his room (in a pull out bed of course) I'd never dream of doing anything dodgy because I see him as a brother and my bf was fine with it.
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geo139
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#10
Report 12 years ago
#10
I'd trust my girlfriend, though might not like the situation if i didnt really know the person, but i do trust her completly.

Depends on your personal situation, its when she doesnt tell you about these visits that you should be worried though!

You could try telling her that you dont like the situation much, but you do trust her so its ok?
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Yusuf.T
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#11
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#11
its all about whether you trust her to be with other dudes alone.
Best thing to do is to just let her know your somewhat uncomfortable about it, its the best thing to do, because if you dont tell her then your paranoia will just build and put further strain on your relationship. Let her know you trust her, but you just dont trust the dude shes staying with.
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kashmir.noir
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#12
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#12
I don't know how to say it, but if you ever doubt anything, with a passion, and have this intuition that keeps beeping, telling you somethings up.

She may not be physically cheating, mentally -perhaps. I've been the girl in the situation, try looking deeper into.

Otherwise it could just be nothing, if she has no history of cheating etc.
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tourist
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#13
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#13
My bf had a "friend" over to stay, a couple of months later I get a heap of messages from her about how she spent the night making out with him. No truth in it but it's a horrible situation to be in I would emphatically say it's a no go if he's staying in her room.
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dh00001
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#14
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#14
i would say if shes told you about it you have less to worry about then if she had done it in secret. it all boils down to how much you trust her..
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Lady Leviathan
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#15
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#15
I would say it depends on the circumstances. Your relationship, her relationship with the person who's house she's staying at, how well you know the people, why she's staying (did you get into an argument and does she want some time alone?). Generally assuming the worst though won't help either of you. You should just talk to her about it and be honest. Tell her that you don't feel right about it and that it bothers you.
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Archibald246
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#16
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#16
At least she's not lying about it....
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limechateaux
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#17
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#17
I wouldn't trust it completely. I'm saying this from experience... Sounds a bit fishy.. especially if it's alone, with no other friends.
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GodspeedGehenna
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#18
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#18
My ex-gf used to sleep over at a guys house with multiple other guys for "band" practice. Turns out all they did was get drunk and watch porn.

I later found out that she had infact made out with two of them.

But I'm sure your girlfriend is faithful...
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Schroedinger's Pandora
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#19
Report 12 years ago
#19
Sorry OP, no offence, but it bugs me how people get into relationships and think they can control another person's life. A relationship is supposed to "add" to your life, not prohibit you from doing what you want.. If you dont trust her, don't be with her. I have loads of guy friends and if my boyfriend tried to stop me doing what i normally do - go to theirs, watch films, have a few drinks, crash over if i'm too drunk/tired to walk home - then he'd see the door.. And fast!

Leave her alone. Jealously isn't attractive.
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Adhsur
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#20
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#20
(Original post by Silkiest)
Jealously isn't attractive.
Neither is really dodgy behaviour.

OP I suggest you tell your gf how uncomfortable you are with the situation, it is only natural to be. Why does she want to stay over, can't she just meet him in the day? Make sure you have all your questions answered, she needs to reassure you here.
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