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Was I abused or overreacting??

When I was 15 I got into my first ever relationship. In the beginning, he was very pushy with sexual things and I did not feel comfortable with it at all, he would make me touch him even when I told him I didn’t want to and we were in public. We were sitting on a field one day (in public again) and he started to touch me, and I told him to stop but he just carried on, even when I tried pushing his arms away with all my might he didn’t stop so I just gave up and let him do it even though it hurt too. Another time I was at his house and he wanted me to give him oral sex. I told him I didn’t want to (I had never had any sexual experience) yet he just sat on my shoulders, pinning me on the bed, and tried to force it in my mouth, until I had to grab a penknife from his draw and threaten him in order for him to back off. Even though these things happened years ago I feel like they still affect me subconsciously and make me extremely wary of men and especially sexual contact. I’m just wondering is this actual sexual assault as he never forced sex on me just other things? And was it my fault for not saying No enough or not seeming serious?
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rnl
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That’s definitely sexual abuse. You did not give consent so he was definitely in the wrong
Yes, you told him no you didn't want and he kept going to force you.
Original post by canadadreams98
When I was 15 I got into my first ever relationship. In the beginning, he was very pushy with sexual things and I did not feel comfortable with it at all, he would make me touch him even when I told him I didn’t want to and we were in public. We were sitting on a field one day (in public again) and he started to touch me, and I told him to stop but he just carried on, even when I tried pushing his arms away with all my might he didn’t stop so I just gave up and let him do it even though it hurt too. Another time I was at his house and he wanted me to give him oral sex. I told him I didn’t want to (I had never had any sexual experience) yet he just sat on my shoulders, pinning me on the bed, and tried to force it in my mouth, until I had to grab a penknife from his draw and threaten him in order for him to back off. Even though these things happened years ago I feel like they still affect me subconsciously and make me extremely wary of men and especially sexual contact. I’m just wondering is this actual sexual assault as he never forced sex on me just other things? And was it my fault for not saying No enough or not seeming serious?



Yes they were assaults.

I suggest you talk to victim support or your GP to get some counselling. You can then decide whether theres any worth in telling the police. It is unclear how long ago this was.

https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/more-us/contact-us
Id call it Sexual Abuse since u said no and still used force
I am so so sorry you had to go through that, at such a young age as well. Yes that was definitely abuse.

Have you considered seeing a therapist? It could really help with any unresolved issues? (There's absolutely no shame in it. Psst.. I see one too.)

Please take care of yourself.:console:

P.S. You can DM me if you'd like some more personal support.
(edited 5 years ago)

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