Should i ask a girl out who is about to go to university? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 7 months ago
#1
A few months ago, I met this girl who I instantly grew a liking to. After noticing a few signs she may be interested in me I asked her out. She seemed really happy, agreed to meet up for a coffee and gave me her number before I even asked. However, when I text her to arrange a time she declined, because of exams, so didn’t feel it was a good time to be dating somebody. So, as I kept her number, a few months later after exams had finished I started talking to her over text. During our texts I found out she was a few years younger than me (She is 18, I’m 21) and is about to go to Uni. I on the other hand have just graduated from Uni. Anyway, I asked her out again to see whether she would like to get to know each other. Even though she admitted she liked me, she didn’t want to date solely because of her moving away to Uni, as she didn’t feel a LDR would work out, which I understood.

At the time, I was going to leave it and move on from her. However, as I follow her on social media she revealed the Uni she is going to, which has given me hope something can happen. Although, I have just graduate from Uni, I’m continuing on to complete a masters and the Uni I’m going to is only 30 minutes away from where she will be going. So, as I have nothing to lose and our universities being close to each other is it worth asking her out again or should I just move on.
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Shish_bish
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#2
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Well, I see some hope here. If the unis are that close, y not give it a try. And later on in the relationship if she’s someone u trust u won’t even have to worry about her messing around.
I get her position as I’ve avoided relationships with good people and not because I didn’t like them but first because I didn’t want a relationship to affect which university I wanna go to and also u always have this thing of what if I meet sm1 better there.
I would say give her all the hints and maybe tell her, see her reaction, if she says No, move on. The universe is saving u from a long distance relationship. And she just 18 she might not be mature enough or ready to fully commit when she moves to uni
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DrSocSciences
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Let her be 18 and enjoy the thrill of starting at uni and embarking on the next stage of her life. Tell her that you like her but want to give her some space as she settles into being a student. Contact her around December. If she's still interested in you, she'll let you know.
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Dunnig Kruger
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Wouldn't her choice of uni depend on her A level results, which she won't have had yet? She wouldn't be the first student that didn't go to their intended university.

It may be that she has in mind a live-together type relationship once she's settled as a student. That's something you may not be able to offer her, even if you are 30 minutes away.

It may be that she wants to be free to meet and try a few potential boyfriends.

It may be that she's decided she's not interested in you and is just coming up with excuses to let you down lightly.

By all means, once she has full confirmation of where she will be studying, try to hook up with her - but don't get your expectations too high. Continue looking for other potential partners for yourself.
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Ecds
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One thing I would say is that if that she doesn't think a long distance relationship wouldn't work then it wouldn't work. I know people who were at Durham university and broke up with their partners in Newcastle.

Long distance ultimately comes down to how much you're willing to work at it and unless it's reciprocal it's going to be very difficult most likely. Long distance does work but that tends to be for people who've been dating for a long time. Consider that she will have fresher's and meet hundreds of new people and might meet someone herself there. There's already potential tension in this situation.

My boyfriend and I had been dating for about a year when he went to university and I stayed home on a gap year. We broke up due to the strains but ultimately got back together after the first term. I'm now heading to university in Oxford and he will be in Durham. My course lasts 6 years and the distance won't be easy for sure. Be ready to feel a lot of strain if you do try for a LDR - they're not a walk in the park but if you love the person enough then they're worth it.
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bengaltiger1
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If you will be ok that she will be shagging random ****boys on freshers week... then go for it. And she will.
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