Year 12s: what will be the first way you research your future options? >>

She is not ready to date. Not ready or not interested

I met this girl who I would regularly see on a train I use to catch when commuting to sixth form. After noticing a few signs, she might be interested in me (such as staring, standing very close, and smiling at me) I decided to talk to her and ask her out. She gave me her number without hesitation and agreed to meet up for a drink. However, a day later she texts me saying due to exams and a recent break up she didn’t feel it was a great time to be dating someone but would be willing to try after exams had finished.

So, after exams finished she added me on social media and we started talking to each other over text. After a few messages I asked her out again, but this received no response. A week went by, so I sent her a text saying it’s fine if she’s not interested and it was great meeting her, just let me know if you are. A few days later she replied apologising saying she has been very busy and said that I seem to be a lovely guy, but she is just not ready to be dating anyone right now. So I’m wondering is she genuinely not ready or is she just gently letting me down. If she is not interested why could she have just said so, as I don’t really know her that well for her to feel bad about it, but I also gave her the opportunity to say it, when I text her that it was fine if she wasn’t.

Ultimately, is it worth asking her again in a few of months to make sure, if in fact she is genuinely not ready or should I just assume she is not interested and just forget about her.

Reply 1

In One Ear

Original post by Anonymous

This is a very odd mixture of hot and cold, I have no idea why she'd use exam season as an excuse to not date you at the time (which sorta could be a fair excuse) but then say maybe you could try after, then actually go as far as to add you herself once exams were over, indicating it was a legit excuse, but then blow you off again, because it does sound like she is blowing you off gently.

Maybe she can't quite decide if she likes you enough to pursue this, or maybe there is someone else who is coming in and out of her life causing her to blow hot and cold. Right now it sounds like shes not really interesting though.