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just realised Ive wasted my life :(

Turned 21 a few days ago, i feel ive completely wasted the developing years of my life doing nothing at all, socially and acadamically. All Ive done since I was 10 is just sit in my house and play games and watch pointless videos just to kill time. At the time I was around 14/15 I knew I needed to start being productive and actually do something with life e.g get into fitness, have a job etc. but always ended up telling myself that I have a lot of time ahead of me, boy I was wrong.

Socially never really had the friends I wanted to have, barely ever step foot outside the house. Didnt go to any events such as prom whereas everyone I have encountered has gone. Makes me feel very low on the things Ive missed out on and didnt get to experience and that the time for that will never come back.

Anyone reading this who are in school, you better take action if you havent already cause you dont wanna be like me and regret not doing anything about yourself.

someone please send me back 5 years!!

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Thank you for the heads up.
I'm 16 and possibly going down the same path...
Don't worry, most people at 21 haven't really accomplished anything. You're far too young to start having those sorts of worries.
It is never too late to start anything. At 21 I had no idea what I was doing, or where I was going and no real desire to do anything about it. I watched friends go off to Uni and forget about me. I stuck myself into a rut I didn't think I would get out of. Spent my days binge watching House MD on TV and eating chips.

To cut a long story short I watched too much TV as a kid but it inspired me to pursue a career I didn't even know existed. 8 years, 1 degree and 3 promotions later I'm in a career I love making a difference to people every day.

It's never too late. It gets better.
Reply 4
You still have a lot of time though. Some statistics would indicate you coudl approximately have another 60 years of life left. All you have lost are your preteen and teen years. Your life is in no way "wasted".

You cant change the past, you can't show the effects of good habits you never had, you can't go to events you missed but what you can do is start good habits today, you can start going to more events that may interest you, you can start making friends, find people to do things with and see that things like "prom" dont mean anything, you can start looking for a job today. So much you can do today or in the week to start being who you want and doing the things you want to do.

I was like you once, but I realised that there is no point thinking about everything i haven't done or didn't do right. The only way forward is to think about what you want and to get out of your shell and do those things.
(edited 5 years ago)
Reply 5
Original post by Erebus_C
You still have a lot of time though. Some statistics would indicate you coudl approximately have another 60 years of life left. All you have lost are your preteen and teen years. Your life is in no way "wasted".

You cant change the past, you can't show the effects of good habits you never had, you can't go to events you missed but what you can do is start good habits today, you can start going to more events that may interest you, you can start making friends, find people to do things with and see that things like "prom" dont mean anything, you can start looking for a job today. So much you can do today or in the week to start being who you want and doing the things you want to do.

I was like you once, but I realised that there is no point thinking about everything i haven't done or didn't do right. The only way forward is to think about what you want and to get out of your shell and do those things.


What age were you like me?
Im 22 went from doing the exact same from 13 coming back to a drink father then I joined the airforce at 19 had to come out due to mental illness and now I’m still doing the same thing back to square one because it’s the only thing that makes me feel conftable I’m suffering real hard and believe me when I say this your life is way ahead of you and you are lucky you don’t have mental illness like I do just keep your head up high and don’t live with regret learn to love your self and things will be just that little bit graceful for you.
Reply 7
Original post by Anonymous
What age were you like me?


I am only a couple of months older than you, but I was you pretty much till I turned 19. The only difference is that I already had a couple of friends, though because of how I would act they wouldn't want me around much.I also had a job, however I only had that for little over a year and a half and it was a dead end job which paid my pretty awfully. I didn't go to my prom, played video games pretty much obsessively, rarely talked to anyone but my few friends (even that was a rarity), didn't go out really at all, did horrifically in comprehensive school, and, didn't work out at all or do anything productive.
(edited 5 years ago)
Reply 8
Original post by Anonymous
Turned 21 a few days ago, i feel ive completely wasted the developing years of my life doing nothing at all, socially and acadamically. All Ive done since I was 10 is just sit in my house and play games and watch pointless videos just to kill time. At the time I was around 14/15 I knew I needed to start being productive and actually do something with life e.g get into fitness, have a job etc. but always ended up telling myself that I have a lot of time ahead of me, boy I was wrong.

Socially never really had the friends I wanted to have, barely ever step foot outside the house. Didnt go to any events such as prom whereas everyone I have encountered has gone. Makes me feel very low on the things Ive missed out on and didnt get to experience and that the time for that will never come back.

Anyone reading this who are in school, you better take action if you havent already cause you dont wanna be like me and regret not doing anything about yourself.

someone please send me back 5 years!!


at the age of 21, I also had the same thinking, but see: all life in front of you. while you can change something - change for the better you have a lot of time
Original post by Anonymous
Turned 21 a few days ago, i feel ive completely wasted the developing years of my life doing nothing at all, socially and acadamically. All Ive done since I was 10 is just sit in my house and play games and watch pointless videos just to kill time. At the time I was around 14/15 I knew I needed to start being productive and actually do something with life e.g get into fitness, have a job etc. but always ended up telling myself that I have a lot of time ahead of me, boy I was wrong.

Socially never really had the friends I wanted to have, barely ever step foot outside the house. Didnt go to any events such as prom whereas everyone I have encountered has gone. Makes me feel very low on the things Ive missed out on and didnt get to experience and that the time for that will never come back.

Anyone reading this who are in school, you better take action if you havent already cause you dont wanna be like me and regret not doing anything about yourself.

someone please send me back 5 years!!

No point in looking backwards. It uses up energy you could be using to make a future for yourself.
Now you must sit down, take stock, make a plan and look to the future whatever you want that to be. I’m 70 and will graduate in a couple of weeks. The past is past and the circumstances of your past may in some way affect you in negative ways, but it’s because of this that you must not allow your past to become your future. Very few of us have had a perfect life but you don’t let it define who you are now.
Original post by Seamus123
No point in looking backwards. It uses up energy you could be using to make a future for yourself.
Now you must sit down, take stock, make a plan and look to the future whatever you want that to be. I’m 70 and will graduate in a couple of weeks. The past is past and the circumstances of your past may in some way affect you in negative ways, but it’s because of this that you must not allow your past to become your future. Very few of us have had a perfect life but you don’t let it define who you are now.

Are you acctually 70? If you are, you are an inspiration.
Original post by Anonymous
Are you acctually 70? If you are, you are an inspiration.

Yes, absolutely. I have 7 grown-up children, 17 grandchildren and 2 greatgrandchildren. My formal education in care was non-existent and family events and my childhood background was such that my generation, working class and in care did not have the opportunities afforded to this generation. I grabbed it with both hands and so must you.
Original post by Anonymous
Turned 21 a few days ago, i feel ive completely wasted the developing years of my life doing nothing at all, socially and acadamically. All Ive done since I was 10 is just sit in my house and play games and watch pointless videos just to kill time. At the time I was around 14/15 I knew I needed to start being productive and actually do something with life e.g get into fitness, have a job etc. but always ended up telling myself that I have a lot of time ahead of me, boy I was wrong.

Socially never really had the friends I wanted to have, barely ever step foot outside the house. Didnt go to any events such as prom whereas everyone I have encountered has gone. Makes me feel very low on the things Ive missed out on and didnt get to experience and that the time for that will never come back.

Anyone reading this who are in school, you better take action if you havent already cause you dont wanna be like me and regret not doing anything about yourself.

someone please send me back 5 years!!


Honestly you have plenty of time to do things and get yourself out there.

Why not try something new or maybe join a sports club, charity or something, perhaps join your local Scout or Guide(if you're female) group and volunteer! I've been a scout leader for nearly 3 years and it's been one of the best things I have ever done it's rewarding and I get to do so many cool things like go do water sports and camping etc. Thats just an example but there are plenty other things like NCS etc. Take some time to look into extra curricular stuff, it'll help you meet new people and it'll help to put stuff onto your CV too for future job opportunities!
You're still young at 21 and a lot of people at that age haven't accomplished much.

You could do an access to he course, a degree with the Open University Online or an apprenticeship.

You could volunteer, Join a club, book reading club, sports club to make friends.

You haven't missed out on much since you're only young, I didn't go prom or do anything at 21 either.

You can experience all the things you want to experience.
Can't change the past. What's done is done. Look forward and do ****. You're 21 so have still got plenty of time to live, you just need to get going.
Original post by PeterAdel
Thank you for the heads up.
I'm 16 and possibly going down the same path...

Make sure to have the best 2 years at college or whatever, 0 regrets and youll be set for the future
Original post by Anonymous
Turned 21 a few days ago, i feel ive completely wasted the developing years of my life doing nothing at all, socially and acadamically. All Ive done since I was 10 is just sit in my house and play games and watch pointless videos just to kill time. At the time I was around 14/15 I knew I needed to start being productive and actually do something with life e.g get into fitness, have a job etc. but always ended up telling myself that I have a lot of time ahead of me, boy I was wrong.

Socially never really had the friends I wanted to have, barely ever step foot outside the house. Didnt go to any events such as prom whereas everyone I have encountered has gone. Makes me feel very low on the things Ive missed out on and didnt get to experience and that the time for that will never come back.

Anyone reading this who are in school, you better take action if you havent already cause you dont wanna be like me and regret not doing anything about yourself.

someone please send me back 5 years!!


Tbh all a tad dramatic and you can easily change things round if you apply yourself.
Due to advancements in modern medicine you have potentially approximately 80years left
I feel the same way about my life, and sometimes i let it get the best of me. The worst thing you can do is continue to miss out on things, because honestly at 21 you still have your whole life ahead of you. Some people realise this at 30 or 40, so you’re really in the perfect postition to turn your life around and still enjoy your youth. What you’re doing is pushing yourself into a kind of “social anxiety” where you don’t want to be around people or do things under the guise of feeling sorry for yourself, trust me dude the only thing you can do is go outside and turn it around. Nobody’s gonna do it for you, and the longer you wait the more you’re gonna miss out on, you only get one life don’t let yours be a waste of time.
Reply 19
Use that feeling to make a change now, instead of moping around feeling sorry for yourself and wishing the past 5 years back. You aren't going to get those years back. If you feel like you have wasted those 5 years then make sure you don't waste the next 5. Get a plan of what you want from life. Think about what sort of job you'd like. Move to a new area for a while, take a leap of faith.

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