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bullying/ptsd/paranoia

Four years ago I was severely bullied in year seven. I had literal mobs of people chase after me, I was beaten up (even by girls) I was manipulated, I was tricked, I was mocked, I was cyber bullied....I moved to a new school halfway through the year where I was fine up until what is nearly two years ago. All my friends left me becasue one of them made up some sh*t that I had said something rude about them when I hadn't.

Everytiem I go out, I get scared of seeing people my age and running into the people that bullied me. my mum and dad say i am worrying unnencessarily. even today, these bullies still try and follow me via social media. Not the same people, but I've been shouted at or pointed out on the street. I have nightmares about being found by the bullies. I used to try and hide, I still do. I can't go out in the town often because i am in genuien fear for myself. sh*tting myself about sixth form because i can either stay at my current school and still not have any friends (been friendless for nearly two years now) or risk encountering these people again. I'll be walking down the street and i think i see them or other people my age, when they turn out to be completelyd ifferent people. I'm scared of large groups of teenagers. The other day two kids on bikes were near me were pointing at me. I thought it was someone from my old school.

I recieve physoclogical help and have been told I display symptons consistent with those from PTSD. Am i warranted in feeling how i am? Should I bite the bullet and try and move on? Have been told i may be eligible for EMDR (PTSD treatment) on NHS when it is avaliable.

thanks

also been quite suicidial sometimes too
Original post by Anonymous
Four years ago I was severely bullied in year seven. I had literal mobs of people chase after me, I was beaten up (even by girls) I was manipulated, I was tricked, I was mocked, I was cyber bullied....I moved to a new school halfway through the year where I was fine up until what is nearly two years ago. All my friends left me becasue one of them made up some sh*t that I had said something rude about them when I hadn't.

Everytiem I go out, I get scared of seeing people my age and running into the people that bullied me. my mum and dad say i am worrying unnencessarily. even today, these bullies still try and follow me via social media. Not the same people, but I've been shouted at or pointed out on the street. I have nightmares about being found by the bullies. I used to try and hide, I still do. I can't go out in the town often because i am in genuien fear for myself. sh*tting myself about sixth form because i can either stay at my current school and still not have any friends (been friendless for nearly two years now) or risk encountering these people again. I'll be walking down the street and i think i see them or other people my age, when they turn out to be completelyd ifferent people. I'm scared of large groups of teenagers. The other day two kids on bikes were near me were pointing at me. I thought it was someone from my old school.

I recieve physoclogical help and have been told I display symptons consistent with those from PTSD. Am i warranted in feeling how i am? Should I bite the bullet and try and move on? Have been told i may be eligible for EMDR (PTSD treatment) on NHS when it is avaliable.

thanks

also been quite suicidial sometimes too


Moved to mental health

Also, you absolutely are right to feel how you feel. Your experiences sound absolutely awful and I'm so sorry you've gone through this. You of course should try to move on, but don't rush yourself. It'll take a while to recover, so just go at a steady pace and you'll get there.
This sounds absolutely awful.
When I was bullied at school, and mocked, and beaten up outside by neighbours' boys (it got even so bad that my three years younger sister went to beat them up).
I stayed in. And read first every schoolbook I had, and did all tasks in advance, and then read through the school library, the town library for kids, and then started the town library for adults, when nothing was left.

Anyway. I missed out on childhood and friendship and first love.

First chance I left. First to the army, then uni.
Got my confidence in the army, first friends in uni, and first love after uni, halfway around the world .

If you can get help from NHS, go for it.
Reply 3
Original post by gweilo100
This sounds absolutely awful.
When I was bullied at school, and mocked, and beaten up outside by neighbours' boys (it got even so bad that my three years younger sister went to beat them up).
I stayed in. And read first every schoolbook I had, and did all tasks in advance, and then read through the school library, the town library for kids, and then started the town library for adults, when nothing was left.

Anyway. I missed out on childhood and friendship and first love.

First chance I left. First to the army, then uni.
Got my confidence in the army, first friends in uni, and first love after uni, halfway around the world .

If you can get help from NHS, go for it.


Yeah physoclogist is NHS too. Sound very similar, all I do is revise now which isn't bad but i get very lonely and bored. I haven't had a real friend in two years at least
I live now 5 years in UK. Don't have any friends outside the office. Or even from the office.
Started parkrun. Like it very much. The running and the volunteering.

I'll do some more volunteering. Did some tree planting in Coventry. Sadly a week after many of the trees we planted were stolen.
Guess that's the sort of society this Kingdom is.
If you can get help, then get help. Some people may not have the same oppurtunity as you, and you have obviously been through a tremendous amount of stress at such a young age. I really hope you're future is brighter than your past. The first step in doing that is trying to find things that can help and support you! If you ever want to talk, I'll.be here x
Original post by Anonymous
Four years ago I was severely bullied in year seven. I had literal mobs of people chase after me, I was beaten up (even by girls) I was manipulated, I was tricked, I was mocked, I was cyber bullied....I moved to a new school halfway through the year where I was fine up until what is nearly two years ago. All my friends left me becasue one of them made up some sh*t that I had said something rude about them when I hadn't.

Everytiem I go out, I get scared of seeing people my age and running into the people that bullied me. my mum and dad say i am worrying unnencessarily. even today, these bullies still try and follow me via social media. Not the same people, but I've been shouted at or pointed out on the street. I have nightmares about being found by the bullies. I used to try and hide, I still do. I can't go out in the town often because i am in genuien fear for myself. sh*tting myself about sixth form because i can either stay at my current school and still not have any friends (been friendless for nearly two years now) or risk encountering these people again. I'll be walking down the street and i think i see them or other people my age, when they turn out to be completelyd ifferent people. I'm scared of large groups of teenagers. The other day two kids on bikes were near me were pointing at me. I thought it was someone from my old school.

I recieve physoclogical help and have been told I display symptons consistent with those from PTSD. Am i warranted in feeling how i am? Should I bite the bullet and try and move on? Have been told i may be eligible for EMDR (PTSD treatment) on NHS when it is avaliable.

thanks

also been quite suicidial sometimes too


OP i am dealing with the exact same ****

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