Finished.

I have just broken up with my boyfriend of two years. He is the only person I've ever known who has actually cared for me. Any other friends of mine are not loyal to me, never ask me out/have no interest in my life and I cant trust them because of their two faced ways.

I really dont know what to do, I feel like there is no point to life now. I'm a bit of an idiot for thinking this but I've already suffered from depression for a while now and have nobody to talk to.

Reply 1

saturn

Why did you break up with him?

Reply 2

generalebriety

16

Well, talk to us.

What's up?

Reply 3

random_bloke

1

maybe she's gone to bed, it was an hour ago.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

OP

Sorry yeah, I went to bed but have woken up now and cant get back to sleep. I dont even know why we broke up, it was all over the phone which was a ridiculous way to end a two year relationship. Cheers. We have been arguing recently but mainly because he is stressed with work at uni. Any little thing starts him off, or he'll start making fun of things I say which has made me question whether he even cares about me anymore. But I can deal with that, I mean thats what relationships are about, supporting each other through bad times as well as the good? The phonecall was just him mumbling and 'not knowing what to say' until i suggest we break up and he surprisingly quickly replies with, 'yeah, maybe its for the best but we can still be friends' and all that rubbish. Its the lack of courage of him to actually say thats what he wanted that has annoyed me. And over the phone. So thats it, two years of my life wasted. I really do love him to bits, I cant imagine not speaking to him everyday. Also, it's probably selfish but I literallly have nobody now...And I wont find anyone else.

Reply 5

sokissme

Anonymous

And I wont find anyone else.

firstly, you will. i know it's gonna sound stupid but there are other guys out there. if this guy wasn't treating you nicely and was wanting to break up with you over the phone then that's really bad, especially after so long together. maybe you should meet up face-to-face and discuss whether you actually want to break up or not. he's probably very stressed with uni, and isn't thinking completely straight. and you are right, relationships are for the good times and the bad. so speak to him. but don't get back together with him just cos you don't think you'll find someone else. you will. and you are worth more than a guy making you believe otherwise.
sorry i can't really help much. but lots and lots of hugs and chin up.
keep smiling and don't worry, there are always other people to talk to. even if they are here on tsr :p:

Reply 6

Thud

17

2 years? That must be a bugger.

There's like 3billion guys in the world. You don't think you'll find another? :hugs:

Reply 7

MaryKay

8

That's harsh, to break up over the phone after 2 years.

Couldn't you meet on neutral ground to talk, face to face?
Maybe suggest that you have a break until the end of term, sometimes people say things because they need a break, not a *break-up*.
Hope that you can resolve things.

Reply 8

Redefined

13

Anonymous

So thats it, two years of my life wasted.

It's not been wasted. Nothing in life stays the same forever. Just be thankful of the time you had (cheesy I know) and use it as a learning experience.

Your still young and have so much ahead of you, don't get bogged down in this situation. Not too long ago I was in a situation where I was with my partner for about 4yrs and to top it off, we had a child together.

During this time I foolishly lost contact with all of my previous friends as we were quite the 'stay in' couple. Anyway, that went pear shaped and I had nobody to turn to, well apart from one of my best friends but anyway.

The point is, you get through things so chin up :smile:

Reply 9

tiny_dancer

To be honest, it sounds like he had a bit of a knee-jerk reaction to you suggesting you break up and he went along with it to keep his pride. This time apart will give you both a chance to realise what you feel about each other and I think there's a strong chance you could get back together. You need to talk about it properly, face-to-face and be completely honest with each other. It will feel like the end of the world right now but I promise you things will get better! :smile:

Reply 10

Pocket Calculator

14

Anonymous

So thats it, two years of my life wasted. I really do love him to bits, I cant imagine not speaking to him everyday. Also, it's probably selfish but I literallly have nobody now...And I wont find anyone else.

i know quite a few people in your situation (myself included.) there's no easy way out, but please try to chin up and try to move on.

Reply 11

Create

2

Anonymous

So thats it, two years of my life wasted. I really do love him to bits, I cant imagine not speaking to him everyday. Also, it's probably selfish but I literallly have nobody now...And I wont find anyone else.

Hey there,

Please don't look at it like you've wasted two years of your life: you haven't. All of the interactions that we have, particularly with those that are the closest to us, shape us as a person. You will have learnt from him, and him from you, and ultimately you will have shared experiences with him that are unique to the both of you, and it's these times that impact on us. In time, you will be able to look back at these times and smile, even though you may not think it now. Be grateful that you had the opportunity to have those experiences.

It's going to be tough for you right now - wrenching someone out of your life after two years, is going to be incredibly hard. But, you will come out of the other side, and you will have learnt from it and developed as a person.

Sometimes it's hard to make new friends. Close friends that you connect with are even harder to find, but they are there, and they enrich our lives. But to experience this, you need to be open to it and give yourself the opportunities to find friends. So, try and get involved with a sports club or dancing club, or an orchestra, or something that you enjoy. Try and choose something that has regular socials, and make the most of them. Step out of your comfort zone: the greater the risk, the greater the reward.

Hugs and best of luck
Cx

Reply 12

*Tears and Butterflies*

2

tiny_dancer

To be honest, it sounds like he had a bit of a knee-jerk reaction to you suggesting you break up and he went along with it to keep his pride. This time apart will give you both a chance to realise what you feel about each other and I think there's a strong chance you could get back together. You need to talk about it properly, face-to-face and be completely honest with each other. It will feel like the end of the world right now but I promise you things will get better! :smile:

I agree with tiny_dancer. i think you need to talk so you both know what eachother really want. I completely understand why he might have agreed to splitting up at the spur of the moment even if he didn't want to either. So yeah, I think you need to explain that you didn't mean it really...

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

OP

Thank you all for your support, very much appreciate it, I thought I might get a load of abuse!

He's a typical guy- doesnt talk or communicate about stuff- and getting any sort of constructive conversation out of him is like getting blood out of a stone. I dont know how to get him to open up. Also even though I love him, I really feel like I never want to see him again at the moment for some reason.

Reply 14

*Tears and Butterflies*

2

Anonymous

Thank you all for your support, very much appreciate it, I thought I might get a load of abuse!

He's a typical guy- doesnt talk or communicate about stuff- and getting any sort of constructive conversation out of him is like getting blood out of a stone. I dont know how to get him to open up. Also even though I love him, I really feel like I never want to see him again at the moment for some reason.

Maybe you feel this way becasue you never expected him to agree to breaking up with you and that hurts, so now your mad with him. It could even be that you both love eachother, but he is mad at you for even suggesting you should split up and you are mad at him for agreeing. Just make sure you don't let the relationship end just like that without finding out what you both want, two years is a long time and you could work this out.

Have you always been happy with your relationship? If yes is the answer, maybe it is worth salvaging. Two years is a long time.

Hope your not feeling too bad.

:hugs:

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

OP

He has completely ignored me all day today. What an idiot. I feel so useless. I dont think I even care anymore though. Being single forever probably isnt a bad idea!

Reply 16

Colt Seavers

I'm available if you get lonely.

Reply 17

weet_ABI_x

11

You will feel awful for weeks and weeks and there's probably nothing you can do to change that, but one day you'll feel better :smile:

Reply 18

Anonymous #1

OP

And the only problem with the relationship is recently he has been putting no effort in. we used to go out a lot and see bands and things but he seems to have no interest in anything anymore. no enthusiasm.

Reply 19

Colt Seavers

Anonymous

And the only problem with the relationship is recently he has been putting no effort in. we used to go out a lot and see bands and things but he seems to have no interest in anything anymore. no enthusiasm.

You want effort and enthuiasm I'm your man!

Finished.

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