I don't undersand the situation..!?

Hey guys,
Before I start, i apologise for the length of this post, but i have quite a lot to try and understand and im not really sure what to do..
There is this girl, and i like her so so much. She is 20 and im 18. we have known each other for about 8 years but only in the last 6t months have i really gotten to know her on a personal level rather than knowing of her and giving the polite hi's and byes. She has not got the easiest life,with not a very happy home life with her parents. She is also not very well, and is prone to fits.
There was a time where we met up every day for 3 weeks just to sit and talk bout things. Any way i siggested last week that we should go away for the weekend, and she agreed and said that she had been thinking th same. Although it didnt actually happen, she has come round to mine for the last 2 nights as my parents are away.. was initially just for a chat but while she was here on friday night she had a fit, and i told her i didnt want her driving home as it was late and she wasnt well, so she agreed to stay the night. After 5 mins of us going into the seperate rooms i heard her cry and went to see if she was ok, and found her lying in the doorway of the bedroom having another fit. After it stopped she got back into bed, but asked me to stay with her, which i did...! Couldnt turn her down as she was ill and my feelings for her are so strong. Evrything went well but nothing happened apart from the constant holding each other.. the next night she arrived quite late and i spent the night with her again.. nothing happened again but just constantly held each other. I spent the day with her today, but she was asleep a lot, but it was amazing.. while she was asleep she grabbed my hand and held it a few times and fell asleep on me.. quite a lot.
A few weeks ago when i told her how i felt, she kind of brushed it off as she is my best friend, and despite it hurt i could see her reasons.
Now with the staying over in the same bed, and the agreeing on going away and the holding each other i dotn know whether from her point of view the situation is different. I dont want to mention it though as i dont want her to stop coming or me seeing her or anything being awkward but i dont no wats goin on..
What would you guys do and sory for the long post..!
Thanks in advance..

Reply 1

crawlinginmyskin2006

If she brushed it off when you told her how you felt maybe she feels the same but doesn't feel prepared to let you know just yet. Go away with her and keep seeing her and something could happen, just don't tell her how you feel again, well not right now as she already knows and she might feel like your pushing her.

Reply 2

randdom

I think that you should talk to her about how you feel. Let her know that you are confused and say that you just want to understand how she is feeling. Don't pressurise her to be with you just say that you want to know the situation.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Rather than telling her how i feel, would it be better to ask her how she sees wat we have.
Do you think its likely she feels the same or am i just hoping too much. She ended up staying again last night, and again notjing happened but wat has happened the last few nights. Seems strange but now that she has gone i feel SO unbelievably deflated and on a low.. but not in a bad way, just because she is not here..
WOW she means so so much to me its not true.. cant quite believe it.
She makes me so so happy no matter how im feeling.
Do you think its better for me to just ask where she feels this is going. I just dont want her to feel like im misinterpreting things and have got the completely wrong idea.. this may make things awkward for her or she may not want to keep meeting up and i cant lose her, or what we have got.
Thanks guys.

Reply 4

randdom

You could start out by asking her where she thinks that things are going but that could easily turn into a what do you think question which I think you need to be prepared for. What ever happens talking to her rather than bottling up how you are feeling is definitely the safest bet.

Reply 5

amazon

Yeah I agree- I think it would be better to try and talk things out. Don't sound too desperate ie trying to push her into saying what she feels- if she wants to tell you she will, if not then you should just be there for her until she does. Explain how you feel and that you would like some clarification as to whether she feels the same.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

i will be there for her until she does.. if that is the case. I always want to be there for her however she feels.. even tho my feelings are so strong and if not reciprocated i still want to be, and will be there for her.
Its gonna be difficult not to sound too desperate, not cos i am, but cos of how i feel. This weekend has been quite possibly the best of my life, and i cant see her spending the whole weekend with me if she doesnt have feelings, but it could be that she sees us as just good friends.. wel not 'just'..
I have to say that as long as she is in my life then i couldnt be happier but i cant chang my feelings anyway!!
Oh well
Thanks for your help guys

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

have tried to tell her, but cant really find the words to say how i feel, they cant really explain it. lol. Its pretty difficult to find wat to say without making it difficult and awkward for her if she doesnt feel the same.

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

wel after asking her how she found the weekend, she replied that "yeah it was good." Seems like she is a little distant today as well.. i dont know maybe im just convincing myself that there is something wrong.. i dont know.. she is everyhtin to me. I can sit here saying that i wil be here for her through everything and i will, but everytime she is distant i get upset, and it hits me really hard. If i ask if if she can meet up and she says shes busy it feels like im punched in the gut, and i no shes got her own life and things to do an ppl to see but i cant seem to be without her. Its just so hard..!

Reply 9

amazon

Ah ok you're starting to sound desperate even on here. You're going to scare her away if you don't chill it out a bit. I can say from experience that being confronted by an overly needy guy (maybe needy is the wrong word, but someone who is really hung up on you) puts on a lot of pressure. You need to back off a bit even if it hurts and let her figure out what she wants with you. As long as you have let her know how you feel, give her some space so that she can let you know where she is. It might seem hard but in my opinion it is definitely the way to go.

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

ok, thanks amazon.
I no i probably seem desperate and needy and to be honest i am, but only for her and i dnt no how to go about it. :-S
Guess i wil just have to give her some space and see what happens from there?
Still find it difficult though.
Thanks

Reply 11

amazon

I mean that in the nicest possible way- I'm sure it will work out for you sooner or later! Good luck and hope it all goes well!