Self-confidence issues

I dont like anything about me, my hair, my clothes, even my bedroom!! I get really down sometimes because i feel like everyone else has a boyfriend and i dont. I dont know why this bothers me as i dont have time for a boyfriend at the moment with exams coming up, and i have to do well in them.

I constantly want to change my appearance, make new friends and then hope i'll be happy. Thing is i havent got a job, cant get a job so i have no money to buy things, and im not sure how to get new friends. Dotn get me wrong, i have plenty of friends, but im not close to them and when im down i dont feel as if i could ring any of them and just let my emotions out.

I meet guys, and i like some of them, but i get my hopes up that something'll happen and it never does, whether its because they have a girlfriend or it just doesnt happen.

For example, I like a guy at the moment, it seemed as if he liked me, i later found that he had a girlfriend, i met her and shes pretty etc and its got me really depressed as i know i could never measure up to her, but i really really like this guy.

Please give me some advice, i hate feeling depressed like this and always having this constant niggling in the back of my mind that im not good enough, no matter how hard i try.

xx

Reply 1

starsilver

Hmmm i tink the problem here is that you think by changing things about yourself everything will magically become ok... but this obv won't happen. It's fun to change things like your room and hair colour and buy new clothes etc. But essentially it won't change the person you are... Have you tried as hard as you possibly can to get a job? When i was looking i had to try sooooooo many places and hardly any of them called back, and lots of them rejected me straight away. The key is to keep going until you find something. I used to have low self confidence, and i still get those low feelings from time to time so i know how you feel. A good thing to do would be to try new things, join a club, start a new sport or something. It can be really good for your confidence and it's a great place to meet new people :smile:

Also, you sound like you may be stressed from your exams coming up, so that may be something that is making you feel down.
About the boyfriend thing that you mentioned. I know you say you compare yourself to other people. You are probably really pretty too. How is your confidence when it comes to talking to people you like? Maybe they didn't know that you liked them? Next time, try flirting a bit more and dropping hints..
I hope this helps a bit
:smile:

Reply 2

Cj-Tj

15

One day I will write the defenitive guide to self confidence and self esteem. Infact, ive already started, but til I finish, here we go once again;

Get a job - you say you cant, but is that in your head or real?

Go to the gym/play a sport - it works wonders.

Dress smartly - everyone feels better when they know they look fantastic.

If there are things you dont like about you (hair colour etc) change them.

Join a club/society if you dont play a team sport.

Do something creative - music, art, writing, whatever.

No point holding in your emotions all the time, guys like a girl who is happy enough to express their feelings.

SMILE!!! Please....... even if its just a fake smile, it will make you feel better and will soon turn into a real smile.

FLIRT!!! Enjoy yourself, guys love to flirt, it makes both parties feel better.

erm... thats all I have off the top of my head, but its a pretty decent list to get started with.

Reply 3

PawPrints91

OP

starsilver

Hmmm i tink the problem here is that you think by changing things about yourself everything will magically become ok... but this obv won't happen. It's fun to change things like your room and hair colour and buy new clothes etc. But essentially it won't change the person you are... Have you tried as hard as you possibly can to get a job? When i was looking i had to try sooooooo many places and hardly any of them called back, and lots of them rejected me straight away. The key is to keep going until you find something. I used to have low self confidence, and i still get those low feelings from time to time so i know how you feel. A good thing to do would be to try new things, join a club, start a new sport or something. It can be really good for your confidence and it's a great place to meet new people :smile:

Also, you sound like you may be stressed from your exams coming up, so that may be something that is making you feel down.
About the boyfriend thing that you mentioned. I know you say you compare yourself to other people. You are probably really pretty too. How is your confidence when it comes to talking to people you like? Maybe they didn't know that you liked them? Next time, try flirting a bit more and dropping hints..
I hope this helps a bit
:smile:

Thanks

Im really good at talking with them, and yeah i flirt back. thing is they always take it as if im being friendly flirty!!! grr

Reply 4

PawPrints91

OP

Cj-Tj

One day I will write the defenitive guide to self confidence and self esteem. Infact, ive already started, but til I finish, here we go once again;

Get a job - you say you cant, but is that in your head or real?

Go to the gym/play a sport - it works wonders.

Dress smartly - everyone feels better when they know they look fantastic.

If there are things you dont like about you (hair colour etc) change them.

Join a club/society if you dont play a team sport.

Do something creative - music, art, writing, whatever.

No point holding in your emotions all the time, guys like a girl who is happy enough to express their feelings.

SMILE!!! Please....... even if its just a fake smile, it will make you feel better and will soon turn into a real smile.

FLIRT!!! Enjoy yourself, guys love to flirt, it makes both parties feel better.

erm... thats all I have off the top of my head, but its a pretty decent list to get started with.

Yeah theyre good. Th whole job thing is because my exams are coming up so i dont have time, and as i want to apply for a course at uni in october that requires a lot of w./experience i have to spend all summer doing that--- therefore dont have time for a job. xx

Self-confidence issues

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