Brother and Sister

Me and my older brother were close. Then we got into an argument over him treating me as if anything got to do with me is not important and hes more important because hes older...like i was already in a strop when he asked me to do something and i said no because i was recoding something on my piano. He then ruined my piece and told me to do what he wanted me to do (He was in a jokey mood) and i went crazy and was like no wait 20 min while i finish this off. He got angry and was like no do it now. i refused so he walked.

We havn't talked in agesss (3months) and i'm wondering what to do... i mean it wasn't my fault but is it worth ruining our friendship over? also personality wise we are both very stubbon and dont apologize unless were wrong. Hes an old fashion - im more important than you becuase i'm older sort of person.

i'm stuck...i've been thinking im right he was being stupid leave it and you'll start talking again but no we dont talk at all and my mum thinks if I dont do something were gonna ruin our relationship. only thing is its not my fault so why should i apologize? i have tried to talk to him but nothing happens. i make him tea etc... but nothing.

any advice please?

Reply 1

abc101

17

I think you should make it up with him - even though it wasn't your fault, in the long run if you're the bigger person and make the effort, it will probably work out better. Ask your mum to ask him round or something, or text him and say you miss him and want to get your relationship back on track. If he won't accept that, then he's got a problem and you'll just have to leave him til he stops acting like a fool. Make the first effort, and tell him you want to let bygones be bygones, and life's too short to fall out with the people you love. Good luck with it, hope it works out okay.

Reply 2

variusers

wow he seems like an idiot.. but he is your brother so bite your tongue and say a fake sorry

Reply 3

Beadrope

abc101

I think you should make it up with him - even though it wasn't your fault, in the long run if you're the bigger person and make the effort, it will probably work out better. Ask your mum to ask him round or something, or text him and say you miss him and want to get your relationship back on track. If he won't accept that, then he's got a problem and you'll just have to leave him til he stops acting like a fool. Make the first effort, and tell him you want to let bygones be bygones, and life's too short to fall out with the people you love. Good luck with it, hope it works out okay.

Well, you could do that - if you fancy spending the rest of your life as your brother's doormat. Coming to him with a simpering apology (especially if it wasn't really your fault) will only encourage him that he can walk all over you.

Besides, as a guy, he's probably forgotten about it already anyway. You're overanalysing transitory reticence.

Reply 4

spacecowgirl89

1

Me and my brother argue over silly things sometimes (he's older than me) but we never go any length of time without speaking. Make up, it's not worth ruining your friendship for regardless of who started it.

Reply 5

Emerald

1

Correct me if I'm wrong but you say it was his fault then say that you were already in a strop and he jokingly ruined your piece and you went off at him? If you got more annoyed then the situation warranted because you were already pissed off then apologise.

Reply 6

Beadrope

Emerald

Correct me if I'm wrong but you say it was his fault then say that you were already in a strop and he jokingly ruined your piece and you went off at him? If you got more annoyed then the situation warranted because you were already pissed off then apologise.

And while you're at it, stencil the word 'WELCOME' on your back and just lie down in front of the door.
If you let him get his way just because he sulked for a while, he'll just do the same thing again, and again, and again.

Reply 7

abc101

17

Beadrope

Well, you could do that - if you fancy spending the rest of your life as your brother's doormat. Coming to him with a simpering apology (especially if it wasn't really your fault) will only encourage him that he can walk all over you.

Besides, as a guy, he's probably forgotten about it already anyway. You're overanalysing transitory reticence.

You have to put your relationship with your loved ones above your pride sometimes. If she cares about her brother and loves him, which I'm sure she does, I think she'd rather have a relationship with him than not, even if it's not as good as one would hope. I didn't say she should apologise - I said she should be the bigger person, and go to him first and say she wants to improve their relationship.

Reply 8

Emerald

1

Beadrope

And while you're at it, stencil the word 'WELCOME' on your back and just lie down in front of the door.
If you let him get his way just because he sulked for a while, he'll just do the same thing again, and again, and again.

The OP asked why they should apologise if its not their fault, I was asking if she was sure it wasn't her fault as she had stated she was already in a strop when her brother approached her.

Reply 9

Beadrope

Emerald

The OP asked why they should apologise if its not their fault, I was asking if she was sure it wasn't her fault as she had stated she was already in a strop when her brother approached her.

One would think an explicit statement in the opening post that it wasn't her fault would have answered that question for you. Apparently not.

PROTIP:

glasses
noun
optical instrument consisting of a frame that holds a pair of lenses for correcting defective vision [syn: spectacles]

Reply 10

Anonymous #2

me and my sister had a massive row at christmas time and we've only started speaking to each other during easter and it was because of our mum lol

she basically forced us to be together for the day at the ideal home show of all places! get your mum to help you out, i never actually said sorry to my sister (i did nothing wrong), but everythings back to normal now which is good since a few months ago she was threatening to murder me lol

Reply 11

Emerald

1

Beadrope

One would think an explicit statement in the opening post that it wasn't her fault would have answered that question for you. Apparently not.

PROTIP:

She might have said that it wasn't her fault but she also said that she 'was already in a strop when he asked [her] to do something' and that he 'was in a jokey mood'. She also said that she 'went crazy.' Now as far as I'm concerned that makes this particular argument the OP's fault disregarding any previous disagreements she may have had with her brother.

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