Confused....Ex Gf's....

I've been with my boyfriend for about a month and a half, and have liked him all the way through secondary school....i'm now at uni so a long time. Anyway, my problem is that, i'm almost certain he is still in love with his ex. I won't go into detail, but basically she was his first gf and she finished the relationship. I know they still talk, and he speaks about her. He says he's not into her anymore and that he just says things to wind me up, but i don't believe it. why say things about an ex, unless u were still thinking about them? not sure what i'm really asking here, just would appreciate some other perspectives? :frown:

Reply 1

gLace

I think you pretty much always have a soft spot for your 1st gf/bf. I'm not justifying what he's doing though, thats mean.

Reply 2

emilina

17

have you told him that you dont like it when he talks about her and you dont see it as him winding you up? coz i think thats a little insensitive to wind you up by talking about his ex. although he wouldnt be with you if he still loved her would he?

Reply 3

whitechocolatetrifle

OP

well, yea, he kind of realised that I was annoyed, and appologised, said he didn't want to hurt me, and that he wanted to be with me not her. I'm just having a hard time believing all of that.

Reply 4

emilina

17

why are you having such a hard time believing it? if he hasnt done anything else to make you doubt it, then dont worry. it sounds a bit like he was just being a bit insensitive. has he mentioned her since apologising?

Reply 5

Beadrope

whitechocolatetrifle

I've been with my boyfriend for about a month and a half, and have liked him all the way through secondary school....i'm now at uni so a long time. Anyway, my problem is that, i'm almost certain he is still in love with his ex. I won't go into detail, but basically she was his first gf and she finished the relationship. I know they still talk, and he speaks about her. He says he's not into her anymore and that he just says things to wind me up, but i don't believe it. why say things about an ex, unless u were still thinking about them? not sure what i'm really asking here, just would appreciate some other perspectives? :frown:

So... you're not satisfied with controlling who he talks to and what he says, but you're also resentful at him over thoughtcrime?

Did you by any chance work for the Soviet Secret Police in a former life?

Reply 6

whitechocolatetrifle

OP

emilina

why are you having such a hard time believing it? if he hasnt done anything else to make you doubt it, then dont worry. it sounds a bit like he was just being a bit insensitive. has he mentioned her since apologising?