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Dad won't let me move into accommodation

So im going into my second year of uni and last year i had triuble revising at home due to noisey neighbours and my dad lost his job so kept walking around the house. And he also kept putting me down and saying basically that im too dumb for education. I don’t even have my own room at home

So this year i want to move into accomadation. At first he said no coz i have do see the rooms first so i missed the deadline for the first accomadation offered. But we went on an accomadation tour and after he said its up to me what i want to do and he will speak to the accomadation office fir a room, which he never did. Now ive been offered accomadation again he is saying no that he won’t let me stay by myself but I’ve not given him a reason not to trust me. I don’t drink or go out with my friends at all. Help
Original post by Pisces42
So im going into my second year of uni and last year i had triuble revising at home due to noisey neighbours and my dad lost his job so kept walking around the house. And he also kept putting me down and saying basically that im too dumb for education. I don’t even have my own room at home

So this year i want to move into accomadation. At first he said no coz i have do see the rooms first so i missed the deadline for the first accomadation offered. But we went on an accomadation tour and after he said its up to me what i want to do and he will speak to the accomadation office fir a room, which he never did. Now ive been offered accomadation again he is saying no that he won’t let me stay by myself but I’ve not given him a reason not to trust me. I don’t drink or go out with my friends at all. Help


Why are you letting your dad "speak" to the accommodation office for you? This is something you should be organising yourself, especially if you don't want your father to meddle.

Your father sounds controlling - just do all the admin/paperwork yourself
Original post by Pisces42
So im going into my second year of uni and last year i had triuble revising at home due to noisey neighbours and my dad lost his job so kept walking around the house. And he also kept putting me down and saying basically that im too dumb for education. I don’t even have my own room at home

So this year i want to move into accomadation. At first he said no coz i have do see the rooms first so i missed the deadline for the first accomadation offered. But we went on an accomadation tour and after he said its up to me what i want to do and he will speak to the accomadation office fir a room, which he never did. Now ive been offered accomadation again he is saying no that he won’t let me stay by myself but I’ve not given him a reason not to trust me. I don’t drink or go out with my friends at all. Help


It's absolutely nothing to do with him.

He needs to know that you are an adult, you are responsible for your own affairs and you are legally allowed to live elsewhere. If you have the means to move into, pay for and arrange this accommodation then nobody else on this earth can stop you from doing so. Simply, do it yourself. If he still protests, I'm sure he'll be even more shocked once you move out yourself one day without any prior notice.

Your dad needs to learn to respect you, be your own person and take control. He has absolutely no say in this, the fact he believes he does and is using it as leverage to keep you at home shows his delusion and also shows he is manipulative and controlling. Don't allow it.

Good luck.
(edited 5 years ago)
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Avatar for Zomar4
Zomar4
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Original post by Pisces42
So im going into my second year of uni and last year i had triuble revising at home due to noisey neighbours and my dad lost his job so kept walking around the house. And he also kept putting me down and saying basically that im too dumb for education. I don’t even have my own room at home

So this year i want to move into accomadation. At first he said no coz i have do see the rooms first so i missed the deadline for the first accomadation offered. But we went on an accomadation tour and after he said its up to me what i want to do and he will speak to the accomadation office fir a room, which he never did. Now ive been offered accomadation again he is saying no that he won’t let me stay by myself but I’ve not given him a reason not to trust me. I don’t drink or go out with my friends at all. Help


Trust me, I understand as I have a emotionally abusive father and the best thing would do to move out and contact the uni to support you in finding a accommodation . I did that and it is the best decision I made
I need to pay the booking fee first but i lost my card but orderd a new one so my mum was going to pay it but won’t anymore
Original post by Pisces42
I need to pay the booking fee first but i lost my card but orderd a new one so my mum was going to pay it but won’t anymore


Speak to the university. You might be able to pay via bank transfer or other means, they may also hold the booking.

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