Got stood up on date and want revenge

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 3 years ago
#1
So I recently got stood up on a date and the whole situation was an experience. he messaged me before hand to say he was excited, I for one was completely terrified (I didn't tell him that) but I went along anyway to face my fears. I waited for around 30 mins then decided to leave because I was obviously quite bored. he then sent me another message, whilst I was on my way home, to say he was there even though I never received a message to say he was running late or anything.
Fast forward a few days, he wants to meet again and I want revenge on the 'pain' he's caused me. It was meant to be my first date type thing and it was all completely ruined (kinda like Hermione and Ron in GoF). He hasn't treated me particularly well in the past either, especially with unwanted photos (I'm sure you all know what I mean) and I know it seems harsh but I want some sort of revenge against him. Any ideas, please help
1
MusabKhan
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#2
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#2
If you want revenge, I wouldn't recommend it. Seriously, it's best to be the bigger person and walk away than have 'revenge'.
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DeepMeaning
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#3
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#3
"He hasn't treated me particularly well in the past either, especially with unwanted photos (I'm sure you all know what I mean)"
Tell me again why do you care?
2
Joleee
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#4
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#4
i like revenge as much as the next person, but this sounds like a waste of energy to me. let's say you make a date and proceed to stand him up - then what happens? he messages you, you make an excuse. the end? what if he really doesn't care? imho the potential backfire might hurt you more than you are now. so not worth it.
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1582
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#5
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#5
Did you not message him to ask if he was running late? Seems like a lapse in communication on one or both parts rather than him standing you up.

If you're no longer interested in having anything to do with this boy then tell him that and cut contact. Trying to get revenge would be childish and will just make you look petty.
5
Sataris
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#6
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#6
Don't start your dating career like this...
2
Anonymous #2
#7
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#7
He's not worth it. Block him off of your life and one day he will realise what he missed! Thats the best revenge.
0
Anonymous #1
#8
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#8
(Original post by MusabKhan)
If you want revenge, I wouldn't recommend it. Seriously, it's best to be the bigger person and walk away than have 'revenge'.
That's true but I don't know how to walk away, I hate feeling so helpless you know
2
Anonymous #1
#9
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#9
(Original post by DeepMeaning)
"He hasn't treated me particularly well in the past either, especially with unwanted photos (I'm sure you all know what I mean)"
Tell me again why do you care?
Why wouldn't I care?
0
Anonymous #1
#10
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#10
(Original post by Joleee)
i like revenge as much as the next person, but this sounds like a waste of energy to me. let's say you make a date and proceed to stand him up - then what happens? he messages you, you make an excuse. the end? what if he really doesn't care? imho the potential backfire might hurt you more than you are now. so not worth it.
In my head, he would care, but I guess it's true that he might not care, I've tried ignoring him in the past and he makes it so difficult to do that
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Anonymous #1
#11
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#11
(Original post by sinfonietta)
Did you not message him to ask if he was running late? Seems like a lapse in communication on one or both parts rather than him standing you up.

If you're no longer interested in having anything to do with this boy then tell him that and cut contact. Trying to get revenge would be childish and will just make you look petty.
I did message him and he never said he was running late. I'm trying to subtly push him away from me because I've tried to cut contact before but he just ends up playing the victim and making me seem like the worse person
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emmaxxx333
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#12
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#12
yesssssss gurl
2
Anonymous #1
#13
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#13
(Original post by Sataris)
Don't start your dating career like this...
It's a trainwreck anyway
1
Sataris
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#14
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#14
(Original post by Anonymous)
I did message him and he never said he was running late. I'm trying to subtly push him away from me because I've tried to cut contact before but he just ends up playing the victim and making me seem like the worse person
Just lay out that it's disrespectful to show up to a date 30 minutes late without saying anything and then cut contact
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Anonymous #1
#15
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#15
(Original post by Anonymous)
He's not worth it. Block him off of your life and one day he will realise what he missed! Thats the best revenge.
Haha thanks I probably will do that
0
MusabKhan
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#16
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#16
(Original post by Anonymous)
That's true but I don't know how to walk away, I hate feeling so helpless you know
Fair enough and it is true that walking away is tough and sucks. I had to walk away from a girl who I liked but repeatedly asked for dirty messages and photos. In the end, I just said screw it and walked away. You will still feel emotion and the want to interact with that lost person again but tell yourself no and the reasons why you're removing them out of your life. In the end, it'll be worth it.
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asif007
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#17
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#17
The guy actually turned up for your date, albeit 30 minutes late, and you want "revenge"? Don't you think that's a bit of an over-reaction? Let's face it, lots of people these days just have very bad punctuality, so why is that something to get upset about? Even when I'm meeting friends casually, I never expect anyone to turn up exactly on time - there's always at least one person who will be late. Sometimes I'm late myself, big deal. Yes, it's common courtesy for them to let you know in advance when they're running late, but surely you can forgive these silly mistakes that people make? Nobody is perfect.

Trust me on this - I've been stood up on dates more times than I care to remember and even I think that waiting 30 minutes is nothing. On one occasion, even though the girl kept messaging to say she was on her way, I waited 2 hours before she stopped replying and then there was total radio silence for weeks after that without even an explanation. After that, I could easily have given up on dating but I still soldier on despite these setbacks. Your experience doesn't sound as bad as this - I think you should give the guy the benefit of the doubt before you start jumping to conclusions and wanting revenge. Trying to get your own back on him when he actually made the effort to turn up in the first place, just makes you sound immature. Maybe he had a genuine reason for being late which he would have explained to you when you met? It sounds like you didn't have the patience to wait for him because you didn't want to go in the first place. The sensible thing to do would be to give him another chance, this time to turn up on time and if he doesn't, move on.
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ANM775
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#18
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#18
(Original post by asif007)
The guy actually turned up for your date, albeit 30 minutes late, and you want "revenge"? Don't you think that's a bit of an over-reaction? Let's face it, lots of people these days just have very bad punctuality, so why is that something to get upset about? Even when I'm meeting friends casually, I never expect anyone to turn up exactly on time - there's always at least one person who will be late. Sometimes I'm late myself, big deal. Yes, it's common courtesy for them to let you know in advance when they're running late, but surely you can forgive these silly mistakes that people make? Nobody is perfect.

Trust me on this - I've been stood up on dates more times than I care to remember and even I think that waiting 30 minutes is nothing. On one occasion, even though the girl kept messaging to say she was on her way, I waited 2 hours before she stopped replying and then there was total radio silence for weeks after that without even an explanation. After that, I could easily have given up on dating but I still soldier on despite these setbacks. Your experience doesn't sound as bad as this - I think you should give the guy the benefit of the doubt before you start jumping to conclusions and wanting revenge. Trying to get your own back on him when he actually made the effort to turn up in the first place, just makes you sound immature. Maybe he had a genuine reason for being late which he would have explained to you when you met? It sounds like you didn't have the patience to wait for him because you didn't want to go in the first place. The sensible thing to do would be to give him another chance, this time to turn up on time and if he doesn't, move on.


That's savage, she was obviously at her house for ages telling you she's on her way whilst you were waiting there for her at the meet point
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asif007
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#19
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#19
(Original post by ANM775)
That's savage, she was obviously at her house for ages telling you she's on her way whilst you were waiting there for her at the meet point
Yeah that much is obvious. My point is that despite all the **** I go through just to get a date to happen, I keep soldiering on and forgetting every bad experience. **** like that doesn't stop me living my life. No point holding grudges. I suggest OP adopt the same attitude.
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username1221160
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#20
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#20
If you want revenge because he was late for a date, I hate to think how you'd react to the ups and downs of a relationship.

He really dodged a bullet by being late.
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