Little backstory now into 30s suffered a very traumatic experience 10 years ago with a family member murdered, 2 years later went to uni and dropped out after 2 years full time and tried going back part time 2 years running, I was in such a bad place I never recovered as had junkie neighbours at one place, mentally ill flatmates at another (not just saying that they admitted it and smashed the place up) at another had people who partied all night and if one was sleeping (at their girlfriends no less) the other was there which meant it was every night.
I blocked out the world, anyway a combination of sleep apnea treatment and me just starting anti depressants means I was ok for first few weeks at college but drained, I don't want to drop out again but feel I need more time to get used to the anti depressants (been on them a week) and my local college does January starts which makes a lot of sense.
But it means dropping out again.
Main problem with college now is im going to a good one far away which means 7am waking up and im not used to medication yet so sleeping 12+ hours a day, when I do get up I am drained and don't get home till 6pm at earliest.
Only 3 days a week but more than I want, im thinking of leaving and doing it part time as of Jan at local college as it takes 15 minutes to get there when theres no traffic and 30 when there is giving me a hour extra in bed a day and home a hour and half earlier.
Only things keeping me there is I don't want to drop out again, the idea of halloween and christmas events.
As a negative its costing me £3-£5 a day travel which comes out of own pocket as travel expenses haven't come in yet so if I leave I won't get them.
Another negative to add is I have to get rush hour trains meaning I have to stand whole way if not lucky, get rammed and pushed by other passengers at station, have to get a 2nd train, if im lucky my whole journey takes a hour door to door but its taking me 90 minutes due to trains being a few minutes late meaning I miss connection.
So its a case of enduring 3 days a week of early starts and late finishes for the payout of 2 or so potential nights out, as the other plan was to get into a routine of early starts (not that early) and use course to get a reference and next year just do 1 module at university for socialising and education reasons.
Don't know what to do? (I should go to bed now as meant to wake in 8 hours)
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