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I've realised I'm probably a sociopath

Anti Social Personality Disorder is the actual diagnosis.

I went to a college doc thinking I had depression or type 2 bipolar because I'm very impulsive and feeling low..

I'm not actually depressed, I just feel bored or empty, I express that through anger and I don't show any signs of actual depression or bipolar.
They mentioned ASPD a couple of times but they're reluctant to give any real diagnosis, I stopped going soon after I realised the only thing they suggested was talk therapy.

My parents have said it before too.

They thought I had abused or dogs, being cruel to them etc.
I never was, I just get angry when they rush to the door because we're having an argument or because they're barking..
I never hit them or abused them.

I was a trouble child, I'd flip tables and break pens over a teacher giving out to me, as well as that I was calculated about it, really vicious, I would say anything I could to get to them..

I started to realise I'm different from others awhile back.
My dad developed prostate cancer, it was early stages and he had his prostate removed stopping any possibility of it spreading and as a result he's fine.
My parents didn't tell my younger siblings, just me.
I saw him in the ICU after the surgery and I was glad he made it through but I never cried over it, I never dwelled on the thought.

He's talked about it since and I just state the facts and say I'm glad you're alright, because I am, I'm connected to him - probably more so than anyone else in my family.. but I realised I don't actually feel empathy.
However, I do understand it - I'm not an idiot.

We were bringing our dog to the vet to be put down, and we were all saying goodbye in the house, she couldn't walk and had terminal cancer.. everyone else was crying and while I felt sad that I'd never see her again I wasn't crying.
Turns out she had a ulcer in her stomach and some strange form of arthritis in her hip, so she took medication and she's fine, she had her uterus removed so that's slowed the cancer drastically and she's still here 6 months later.

I can almost 'turn it on' in a sense, I do well talking to girls in clubs, I'm good at making connections.
I'm terrible at long standing relationships, I've fallen out or grown apart from everyone I went to college with in first year..

I get very easily frustrated too, I've broken cupboard doors because I caught my trouser pocket on the handle..

I'm not an inherently bad person, I'm machiavellian but not sadistic.

I don't see any upside to getting a professional diagnosis, you're labelled negatively, and the suggestion is talk therapy.. which on a positive note might make you better at managing the slightly negative sides: impulsivity, anger etc..

This isn't something I can talk about with others, people don't like hearing it and worse than that it stands only to negatively impact all relationships.

Apparently even the way I dress is evidence of ASPD, I dress, well but 'out there' I like Saint Laurent boots, skinny jeans, and shearling coats.

Like many if not most with ASPD I also show traits of narcissism.

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Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
Anti Social Personality Disorder is the actual diagnosis.

I went to a college doc thinking I had depression or type 2 bipolar because I'm very impulsive and feeling low..

I'm not actually depressed, I just feel bored or empty, I express that through anger and I don't show any signs of actual depression or bipolar.
They mentioned ASPD a couple of times but they're reluctant to give any real diagnosis, I stopped going soon after I realised the only thing they suggested was talk therapy.

My parents have said it before too.

They thought I had abused or dogs, being cruel to them etc.
I never was, I just get angry when they rush to the door because we're having an argument or because they're barking..
I never hit them or abused them.

I was a trouble child, I'd flip tables and break pens over a teacher giving out to me, as well as that I was calculated about it, really vicious, I would say anything I could to get to them..

I started to realise I'm different from others awhile back.
My dad developed prostate cancer, it was early stages and he had his prostate removed stopping any possibility of it spreading and as a result he's fine.
My parents didn't tell my younger siblings, just me.
I saw him in the ICU after the surgery and I was glad he made it through but I never cried over it, I never dwelled on the thought.

He's talked about it since and I just state the facts and say I'm glad you're alright, because I am, I'm connected to him - probably more so than anyone else in my family.. but I realised I don't actually feel empathy.
However, I do understand it - I'm not an idiot.

We were bringing our dog to the vet to be put down, and we were all saying goodbye in the house, she couldn't walk and had terminal cancer.. everyone else was crying and while I felt sad that I'd never see her again I wasn't crying.
Turns out she had a ulcer in her stomach and some strange form of arthritis in her hip, so she took medication and she's fine, she had her uterus removed so that's slowed the cancer drastically and she's still here 6 months later.

I can almost 'turn it on' in a sense, I do well talking to girls in clubs, I'm good at making connections.
I'm terrible at long standing relationships, I've fallen out or grown apart from everyone I went to college with in first year..

I get very easily frustrated too, I've broken cupboard doors because I caught my trouser pocket on the handle..

I'm not an inherently bad person, I'm machiavellian but not sadistic.

I don't see any upside to getting a professional diagnosis, you're labelled negatively, and the suggestion is talk therapy.. which on a positive note might make you better at managing the slightly negative sides: impulsivity, anger etc..

This isn't something I can talk about with others, people don't like hearing it and worse than that it stands only to negatively impact all relationships.

Apparently even the way I dress is evidence of ASPD, I dress, well but 'out there' I like Saint Laurent boots, skinny jeans, and shearling coats.

Like many if not most with ASPD I also show traits of narcissism.

Lmao, what even... Did your therapist say that? If so, you need a new one.
Reply 2
Original post by Ciel.
Lmao, what even... Did your therapist say that? If so, you need a new one.


Not the part about clothing, but it's often stated that the dress sense is less restricted as they don't adhere to social norms.. so dressing femininely despite not acting feminine.
It's probably more to do with narcissistic traits than ASPD but there's apparently an overlap.

I don't have a therapist anymore, not for that reason.
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
Not the part about clothing, but it's often stated that the dress sense is less restricted as they don't adhere to social norms.. so dressing femininely despite not acting feminine.
It's probably more to do with narcissistic traits than ASPD but there's apparently an overlap.

I don't have a therapist anymore, not for that reason.


Do you want to know what I really think? No sociopath would ever worry about being a sociopath, so you are fine, lol.
Reply 4
Original post by Ciel.
Do you want to know what I really think? No sociopath would ever worry about being a sociopath, so you are fine, lol.


Not worried, that's an assumption.
I'm interested, if you had read the post and not focused on the first think you could write lol or lmao at you'd see I'm asking more so about why someone would get assessed, I don't see there being anything wrong with me in any definition of the word.

I'm just interested.
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
Not worried, that's an assumption.
I'm interested, if you had read the post and not focused on the first think you could write lol or lmao at you'd see I'm asking more so about why someone would get assessed, I don't see there being anything wrong with me in any definition of the word.

I'm just interested.


I don't see any questions in your initial post. But - most sociopaths don't ever get diagnosed. If a sociopath can get through their childhood without their parents dragging them to see a shrink, due to very extreme traits, like animal/sibling abuse, they will most likely never get diagnosed.
(edited 5 years ago)
Reply 6
Really?
You'd think on a mental health forum of all places you'd get people who want to help and not demean the ones asking the question irregardless of the condition.
Nice to know I'm still a better person than you and I don't feel empathy.

In the off-chance you weren't being a 'I'm so cool' teen posting and you were being serious; it's a sh*t show in my option.
Original post by Anonymous
Really?
You'd think on a mental health forum of all places you'd get people who want to help and not demean the ones asking the question irregardless of the condition.
Nice to know I'm still a better person than you and I don't feel empathy.

In the off-chance you weren't being a 'I'm so cool' teen posting and you were being serious; it's a sh*t show in my option.

ahahahhah now this guy is one angry f*cker
(edited 5 years ago)
Reply 8
Original post by Ciel.
I don't see any questions in your initial post. But - most sociopaths don't ever get diagnosed. If a sociopath can get through their childhood without their parents dragging them to see a shrink, due to very extreme traits, like animal/sibling abuse, they will most likely never get diagnosed.


Ok that was my fault, I'm talking on 3 different forums at the moment..
As for this.. it's not something you can say to people, I can say it here, nobody knows who the hell I am.
I can't say it to people I actually know, I don't care what they'd think but it comes with outright negative connotations, I may as well shoot myself in the foot and even then I'd be better off.

I've been to a psychologist, on the recommendation of a career guidance counsellor of all people.
End result was nothing changed and the psychologist was/is not very good at his job - he talked about his brilliant neurosurgeon nephew the whole session.
Reply 9
Good, we're on the same page.
p.s I kinda relate to what youre saying.
Original post by usa10198292
ahahahhah now this guy is one angry f*cker


Not always, it's just a cheap answer like someone talking about intelligence or god forbid IQ and everyone bringing up Rick and Morty.
Reply 12
Original post by Anonymous
Ok that was my fault, I'm talking on 3 different forums at the moment..
As for this.. it's not something you can say to people, I can say it here, nobody knows who the hell I am.
I can't say it to people I actually know, I don't care what they'd think but it comes with outright negative connotations, I may as well shoot myself in the foot and even then I'd be better off.

I've been to a psychologist, on the recommendation of a career guidance counsellor of all people.
End result was nothing changed and the psychologist was/is not very good at his job - he talked about his brilliant neurosurgeon nephew the whole session.


Why would you want to share this with anyone, though? How would that change anything? And who cares what people think, anyway?
Original post by Anonymous
Not always, it's just a cheap answer like someone talking about intelligence or god forbid IQ and everyone bringing up Rick and Morty.

relax he’s probably asking you if you’ve seen the show to see if you relate to the guy in the show.
you could be a psychopath
Original post by Anonymous
Anti Social Personality Disorder is the actual diagnosis.

I went to a college doc thinking I had depression or type 2 bipolar because I'm very impulsive and feeling low..

I'm not actually depressed, I just feel bored or empty, I express that through anger and I don't show any signs of actual depression or bipolar.
They mentioned ASPD a couple of times but they're reluctant to give any real diagnosis, I stopped going soon after I realised the only thing they suggested was talk therapy.

My parents have said it before too.

They thought I had abused or dogs, being cruel to them etc.
I never was, I just get angry when they rush to the door because we're having an argument or because they're barking..
I never hit them or abused them.

I was a trouble child, I'd flip tables and break pens over a teacher giving out to me, as well as that I was calculated about it, really vicious, I would say anything I could to get to them..

I started to realise I'm different from others awhile back.
My dad developed prostate cancer, it was early stages and he had his prostate removed stopping any possibility of it spreading and as a result he's fine.
My parents didn't tell my younger siblings, just me.
I saw him in the ICU after the surgery and I was glad he made it through but I never cried over it, I never dwelled on the thought.

He's talked about it since and I just state the facts and say I'm glad you're alright, because I am, I'm connected to him - probably more so than anyone else in my family.. but I realised I don't actually feel empathy.
However, I do understand it - I'm not an idiot.

We were bringing our dog to the vet to be put down, and we were all saying goodbye in the house, she couldn't walk and had terminal cancer.. everyone else was crying and while I felt sad that I'd never see her again I wasn't crying.
Turns out she had a ulcer in her stomach and some strange form of arthritis in her hip, so she took medication and she's fine, she had her uterus removed so that's slowed the cancer drastically and she's still here 6 months later.

I can almost 'turn it on' in a sense, I do well talking to girls in clubs, I'm good at making connections.
I'm terrible at long standing relationships, I've fallen out or grown apart from everyone I went to college with in first year..

I get very easily frustrated too, I've broken cupboard doors because I caught my trouser pocket on the handle..

I'm not an inherently bad person, I'm machiavellian but not sadistic.

I don't see any upside to getting a professional diagnosis, you're labelled negatively, and the suggestion is talk therapy.. which on a positive note might make you better at managing the slightly negative sides: impulsivity, anger etc..

This isn't something I can talk about with others, people don't like hearing it and worse than that it stands only to negatively impact all relationships.

Apparently even the way I dress is evidence of ASPD, I dress, well but 'out there' I like Saint Laurent boots, skinny jeans, and shearling coats.

Like many if not most with ASPD I also show traits of narcissism.


I honestly think i might be a socialpath too. My dad had a stroke and i was glad that he survived but i wasn't feeling emotional or such. Back in 2013, when my grandfather died and i saw my mum crying i went to go comfort her but i wasn't feeling anything - Although i was saddened by the death of her father, i wasn't crying or was in an emotional state.
Original post by Ciel.
Why would you want to share this with anyone, though? How would that change anything? And who cares what people think, anyway?


I like the attention.
I think it's an interesting perspective.

A lot of psycho/sociopaths apparently fall into this same idea..
So hedgefund managers will see themselves like the guy from the show Billions - who people think is a sociopath and generally has a lot of negative traits.

James Fallon, (look him up, very interesting) is a prime example too.
so despite the negative affects, it's not a fact of caring what others think it's just doing what I/they want in-spite of what's laid out in front of them.
Original post by politicalpotato
you could be a psychopath


Why do you think that?
Or what do you see as the difference between that and sociopathy?
Reply 18
Original post by Anonymous
I like the attention.
I think it's an interesting perspective.

A lot of psycho/sociopaths apparently fall into this same idea..
So hedgefund managers will see themselves like the guy from the show Billions - who people think is a sociopath and generally has a lot of negative traits.

James Fallon, (look him up, very interesting) is a prime example too.
so despite the negative affects, it's not a fact of caring what others think it's just doing what I/they want in-spite of what's laid out in front of them.

Not really. Most sociopaths tend to hide their negative traits, and they are insanely good at it - until they get what they want from you.
Interesting post. I have been going to therapy for 21 months now. Going well. I used to think there was a sociopathic and psychopathic part of me. As I would have a part of me able to close off any emotions and focus on everything around me at the same time. However it was simply me trying to numb myself from feeling more sadness or being damaged more emotionally. Are you fairly high IQ or intelligence? As the numb part of me is highly intelligent and strategic in thought and action. Since you can feel 'sad' I don't think you are a sociopath or psychopath, I think it is more you have different emotional parts of you which you have learned to use in different situations. There will be an underlying emotional reason for this from your childhood.