Thinking about dropping out of uni but not sure what else to do Watch

phoebe.lawson
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I've just come back to uni about to start my second year. This is my second uni as I did one year at another one but dropped out and started at this one as I wasn't happy. I loved first year and had such a great time, but I've come back to uni this time and been miserable. I haven't even started term yet but I just feel as if I've lost all my interest and motivation in it. It's freshers but I haven't felt like going out, which isn't like me at all, I've just been staying in bed watching tv, I can't stop crying and I don't want to do anything. It's so unlike me. I think the problem is that my course is 4 years long, so I have 3 years left and have done 2 years of uni already. I feel like if I'm losing interest in the course now it'll only get worse, plus I have a year abroad which I'm dreading. I feel like I want to drop out, but the main reason I'm unsure is because I don't know what else to do, I have no idea what I want to do as a job anyway. I do feel ready to start working but I don't know what I would do. Also realistically I don't think I will end up using my degree even if I do finish it, so I might be in the same position in three years anyway where I just get a random job. My mum is very keen for me to finish it and I do worry that I'm doing it because I feel like I should. I don't really want to be there anymore but I don't know what else to do. Do I need a plan before I drop out? I have no idea what to do so any advice would be really appreciated!
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SherlockMetson
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I'm sorry you're so unhappy. A plan is usually a good idea, but in the meantime it sounds like you could do with a bit of support. Do you have a student counsellor or similar to chat to. If the 1st year went well it would be interesting to know what has changed. There is no rush to act drastically. Take your time and ask for some help. Good luck.
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mmnkeir
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(Original post by phoebe.lawson)
I've just come back to uni about to start my second year. This is my second uni as I did one year at another one but dropped out and started at this one as I wasn't happy. I loved first year and had such a great time, but I've come back to uni this time and been miserable. I haven't even started term yet but I just feel as if I've lost all my interest and motivation in it. It's freshers but I haven't felt like going out, which isn't like me at all, I've just been staying in bed watching tv, I can't stop crying and I don't want to do anything. It's so unlike me. I think the problem is that my course is 4 years long, so I have 3 years left and have done 2 years of uni already. I feel like if I'm losing interest in the course now it'll only get worse, plus I have a year abroad which I'm dreading. I feel like I want to drop out, but the main reason I'm unsure is because I don't know what else to do, I have no idea what I want to do as a job anyway. I do feel ready to start working but I don't know what I would do. Also realistically I don't think I will end up using my degree even if I do finish it, so I might be in the same position in three years anyway where I just get a random job. My mum is very keen for me to finish it and I do worry that I'm doing it because I feel like I should. I don't really want to be there anymore but I don't know what else to do. Do I need a plan before I drop out? I have no idea what to do so any advice would be really appreciated!
I think I'm in almost the exact same situation as you. I had a friend in my first year who left uni in December (2017), went home and got a job (she said she was happy within 2 weeks of being back + felt sure she'd made the right decision) and then worked out what she wanted to do within a few months. She is now at a different uni & loving it.. but I don't feel I have the stability & decision making skills to do the same. I'm sure she would advise you to leave & take time to work things out at home!! If you can! (she has been telling me this also)

I am 2 weeks into my 2nd year and still can't bear the course. I don't feel like going out either & also have NO idea what I want to do with my life. The only thing I am certain of is that I can't commit myself to my degree (for 3 more years- I'm in Scotland). I have been basically lying to my family the past year, saying I'm happy & enjoying myself/the course here because I don't want to let them down- I go to a 'prestigious' art school that is apparently hard to get into. They are really proud of me for getting in here but I just don't feel like I fit in at all. Another reason I feel I can't leave is that I am renting a flat with 2 friends- if I left they'd have to find someone else to rent my room..... If I didn't have that commitment I'm sure I'd have left by now. None of my family or flatmates know how much of a hard time I'm having because I can't stand admitting my weaknesses lol. I also don't want to go home because I can't handle living with my sister again haha

The other issue is that, like you, I have noooo clue of what to do. I hate this feeling so much & 100% empathize with you. I could have almost written your post word for word myself!
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not Beans
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I'm in the same situation too, I'm really unsure about my course, the career it will lead to - i really don't know if I want at all, it wasn't something that I had planned to do. I've just lost interest in all the things I do like, I feel like I should switch courses but all the options feel like the wrong idea. I have a few people I know but I don't feel like I've had a connection with anyone. Uni is just not what I expected to be at all. At the moment I'm too scared to drop out, I like my independence and my depression gets worse being at home (with my family). You don't need to choose the next step right now but, good things to keep in mind are: 1) think about what you have been good at in the past and why (what motivated you, what support did you have, why were you good at it) 2) what you enjoy on a day to day basis 3) whatever you choose is not and does not have to be your final decision.
I guess things to do now is definitely talk to a counselor - that calmed me down a lot. Talking to a careers counselor might help too. Lastly: look after yourself! Chat to a friend, do something you enjoy, go outside, distract yourself because sometimes thinking it over and doing nothing can make you feel worse.
What I'm doing is trying to commit to being here - for now. I'm trying my best to have the best uni experience, to make it what I thought it would be. I'm also going to try doing things, like volunteering, so I have more options about a future career. I'm not really sure what else to say other than I know how **** it is, and what ever you choose, it will be okay.
Last edited by not Beans; 8 months ago
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