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Am I toxic?

Got called a toxic friend by someone on here so I'm trying to figure out if I really am.

Basically my friend was self-harming because of his gf , and I gave him advice (as well as his other friends) that he should break up. He said that he'll end up committing suicide because of her in the gc, so I got really worried. His gf was actually my other friend, who I considered toxic as she bullied me for years. However people have said that I shouldn't get involved into people's relationship, and someone even said I'm the toxic one, instead of his gf.

Was it a bad choice that I adviced him to break up? I mean, it's the most reasonable thing to do, at least that's what I think.

Reply 1

Yusra19

What you did was good because you are showing him that you care for him. Don't know why that person called you toxic probably because that person took it quite seriously that you told a couple to break up? But yeah no you didn't do anything wrong you are just showing care to your friend.

Reply 2

bones-mccoy

You're not toxic. As an outsider you can see that the most logical thing to do would be ending the relationship as it's obviously quite damaging to at least one person involved. Unfortunately your friend is so caught up with his own feelings he is basing his decisions on emotion rather than fact - at the moment the idea of losing his girlfriend is so painful that he sees harming himself as a better alternative. I generally agree with not getting involved in other people's relationships but when an individual is actively harming themselves due to the relationship then it becomes a much more serious matter and it's sad that his other friends are so willing to not step in.

I would speak to your friend but don't tell him to break up with his girlfriend, instead focus on him seeing a doctor and getting help for his self harming issues as this is the most pressing problem at the moment. Tell him you'll always be there for him if he needs to speak to anyone.