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For my boyfriend is grinding in a relationship okay. Should I break up with him?

Hi guys,

my boyfriend was dancing with another girl in a bar. He and his friends sit on a table and she sit on the table next to them with her friend and he walked there and asked her if she wanted to dance with him.

I found out because my friend saw all of this and him dancing close (not grinding in this case) to her and talking a while. Nothing more happened, but after I found out, I talked to him that in my opinion this is not okay. I am cool if he dances with a female friend in a funny way, but going to to a stranger just because he finds her pretty and asks her to dance is in my opinion respectless and shows in my opinion that he is not really into me.

He then told me it was just fun and he asks her and she is even from the same country like me. (Pretty small country, many don't even know it). So I asked him what she said that his girlfriend is from the same country and he said he didn't mention that he has a girlfriend. At that point I was pretty mad. When my boyfriend would be from a country almost no one is from and I am talking to someone who is from there too, the most normal reaction in this case is to mention that my boyfriend is from there too... in my opinion..

After this I talked with him about boundaries that in my opinion something like this is not okay. And then he started saying that he is total cool about sth like that, it is just dancing and he won't stop doing it because it is not cheating and even grinding is for him okay, but he can stop the grinding if I don't like it, but he won't stop the normal dancing with foreign girls, cause he loves dancing so much. This is definetely not true, when we out with his friends maybe we dance one time but he prefers sitting, talking and drinking beer.

Also I told him how would he feel if I would behave like him and he just said I can grind with every guy I want, because it is just dancing. (He knows exactly I would never do this). Then I discussed with him that many men get hard while grinding how this can be okay. He just said he gets hard from porn too and it is not cheating, as long as he is not kissing her and so on it is in his opinion okay.

I am pretty shocked, cause the reason I am with him is because I thought he is such a good human being with high morality and now he is like a completely different person. Even his best friend is with me on this and says he is not used to have a girlfriend plus I would be way too attractive for him and that is why he need to push his ego with this.

Talking with him doesn't change much. He says he won't stop doing the dancing but he can stop the grinding and dry humping if this is sooo important for me (With a voice as I would be crazy jealous)

I am really thinking about breaking up with him, but I don't know if I am maybe overreacting. I can't ask my friends, they are of very high morality, and they all are saying that he is respectless. I am just scared to make a mistake.
I think it’s best that you break up with him. If he is not going to respect you and be like that, there’s no point carrying it on. It will only get worse.
Break up with him, he's not respecting how you feel and that you weren't happy with it. to me, Grinding with someone is cheating,it can make your partner feel like they aren't good enough, If he isn't respecting how you feel about just dancing with another girl but also not even mentioning you at all, then he doesn't deserve your respect or you at all, please, for your own sake, break up with him, get out, away and do something that'll make you happy, with people that respect and make you happy! hope it works out!
Reply 3
"Respectless" I think the word you're looking for is disrespectful.

But yeah I pretty much agree with anon 1 👆

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