The Student Room Group

Quantity or Quality

Ive been offered a dilemma and I don't know which to go for.

I can't get a girlfriend, so only time I get with women is by paying for it.

Ive been talking to two girls, but I can only meet one of them.

On one side is the escort..professional sex working, loads of great reviews, and apparently she could be the pefect woman to spend some time with. A lot of girls for example wont even kiss, but this one will and more. However when I tried to arrange to meet her this week, she read my message and didnt reply. She's asking £100 for the hour (special rate down from £140) at hers.

On the other side of the coin, I do a bit of photography on the side more as a hobby than anything. An adult model has messaged saying she'll do an adult photoshoot up to and including sex for 3hrs for £100, but I'll need to book a hotel which is a further £50. She's also not as attractive as the escort and a little older, but has said she'll do basically anything I want her too.

So I can't decide, do I try and spend an hour with a gorgeous blonde escort who could be my perfect 'date', or go for 3hrs with a wannabe porn star who says shes up for anything and I can photo/film us together for personal use, but will have to pay a bit more and isn't as attractive?
What do you mean you can't get a girlfriend?
Original post by Anonymous
Ive been offered a dilemma and I don't know which to go for.



A dilemma is actually a choice between two equally unhappy options. According to your description, this isn't one.
Quality over quantity any day of the week.

Also you have to look at it this way. The model likely is not nearly as used to sleeping with men for money as the escort. So likely you will have a more natural and fun time with the escort. Assuming you are used to punting and know how to pick the good girls!

And for £100 with the model I can only imagine how bad of an experience that will be. She is clearly so cheap for a reason. One thing I learnt with all this is that you seriously get what you pay for in this business.

If you are anywhere around Manchester I can recommend you some great places (Legal disclaimer, for companionship time only lol) 😎
(edited 5 years ago)
WaffleApple, if the escort is more used to sleeping with men for money, then that would indicate a distinct possibility of a "less natural and fun time". Because she may well be more hardened, and more "cute" in getting the most money for the minumum time and effort - which seems to be the main goal of priostitutes (in general).


As Analyst89 has already rightly pointed out, this whole thread is based on a false premise. It is 100% complete and utter nonsense for the OP to say he can't get a girlfriend. He's certainly not going to get one with either of these 2 women. He may get a physically pleasurable experience, but he will burn through a lot of money quickly for minimal benefit.


The OP should go with both or go with neither. If he goes with both, he should toss a coin as to which one goes first.
Reply 5
Original post by Analyst89
What do you mean you can't get a girlfriend?

Original post by Dunnig Kruger
As Analyst89 has already rightly pointed out, this whole thread is based on a false premise. It is 100% complete and utter nonsense for the OP to say he can't get a girlfriend. He's certainly not going to get one with either of these 2 women. He may get a physically pleasurable experience, but he will burn through a lot of money quickly for minimal benefit.


Im 35, ive NEVER had a girlfriend, or even been kissed (without paying for it). Im considered by most women as ugly and im overweight. Believe me, ive tried, and no girl is interested in me naturally..
And now due to work and lack of time, I rarely if ever go 'out' so have no opportunity to meet random drunk girls who may be up for a fumble somewhere..
So I stand by my statement that I cannot get a girlfriend. Its been 10 months since I did anything with a girl, yet its all I can think about lately so leaves my only option to pay for it.
Your mindset is too negative. You are making excuses for yourself.

Most of the reasons that you have given for you not be able to get a girlfriend are under your control. And yet you have not done enough, so far, to negate these factors.


An ugly face can be snmewhat remedied via plastic surgery. However I would strongly recommend that you don't go down that line of action. You are overweight. And that is entirely under your control. Increase your exercise regime a little bit and reduce your food intake a little bit and over the next 9 months your body will become more attractive. Someone with an ugly face and an attractive body is attractive enough to get a girlfriend easily enough. All you need from there is the right attitude.


Work and a lack of time. By law you are not obliged to work more than 48 hours per week, averaged over a 17 week period. That leaves you with plenty of time to sleep, do your chores and to go out socialising. If you are working more than 48 hours that will be at your discretion. In which case, you should be earning enough money to make it worthwhile.

Also, there's nothing to stop you changing your job. The job that you do and the hours that you work are largely under your control.


If you are 35, employed and working long hours, even on minimum wage, you will have enough money to see both these prostitutes.

You should also have enough money to go to a matchmaker. Possibly an international one. Going to a good one of these will increase the chances of you getting a girlfriend a lot.

That's assuming you're not frittering your money away on booze, gambling, cigarettes, expensive car etc etc etc.
Original post by Anonymous
Im 35, ive NEVER had a girlfriend, or even been kissed (without paying for it). Im considered by most women as ugly and im overweight. Believe me, ive tried, and no girl is interested in me naturally..
And now due to work and lack of time, I rarely if ever go 'out' so have no opportunity to meet random drunk girls who may be up for a fumble somewhere..
So I stand by my statement that I cannot get a girlfriend. Its been 10 months since I did anything with a girl, yet its all I can think about lately so leaves my only option to pay for it.


You don't need the validation of women. Don't care what they think.

You can try online dating, speed dating, joining clubs out of interest, meeting women through bars, coffee shops, meeting women through your network and approaching them.

Be confident in yourself, work out, have a life, go out with your buddies, do things that make you happy, learn a skill, improve everyday, be positive.

Be your best self, wear nice well fitting clothes, groom well, have good posture, relax.

If you're overweight, hit the gym, change your diet etc.
Reply 8
Original post by Dunnig Kruger

Work and a lack of time. By law you are not obliged to work more than 48 hours per week, averaged over a 17 week period. That leaves you with plenty of time to sleep, do your chores and to go out socialising. If you are working more than 48 hours that will be at your discretion. In which case, you should be earning enough money to make it worthwhile.

Also, there's nothing to stop you changing your job. The job that you do and the hours that you work are largely under your control.

If you are 35, employed and working long hours, even on minimum wage, you will have enough money to see both these prostitutes.

I work 32hrs a week, at £7.83 an hour (minimum wage).
By the time I get home, im too tired to do anything and I have no friends to go socialising with, and thats if my social anxiety didn't prevent those sort of things in the first place.

As for changing jobs..because yeah its that simple right! Ive worked 17 years in retail. I have no qualifications. All that is around in my area is more part time retail work, care work, call centers (I suffer anxiety on phones) or jobs im not qualified for. And no I cannot go to college for qualifications as I dont have the time with the shift times in work (and to change them would mean id have to sign a flexi contract, to be available at a moments notice for them which I wouldn't be able to be!) nor can I afford it, or have the concentration span for it. So I am literally stuck in a dead end retail job earning minimum wage.

The money I do earn I spend on comic cons and meeting actors, something which I cannot give up (and is about the only non-work thing I do anymore)..I have 3 within the next 6 weeks, and somehow I need to find £1000 for them, which on minimum wage is why ive got a dilemma of which girl to see, as technically I cant really afford to see either!
Reply 9
Go with the model. She's older and up for anything. Plus you could get your own homemade movie! No brainer really. Stay safe and enjoy!
Reply 10
I've always been a heavyset, average looking lad and even I can go get my end away with a decent looking bird if I want to. Mate don't go down this road, it's grim as ****.
32 hours a week is working 4 days at 8 hours per day. What do you do the other 3 days of the week?

If you're too tired after an 8 hour day, it's time to make some small changes to your fitness regime and what you eat. Just a few minutes extra exercise every other day and just a bit more fresh fruit, vegetables, nuts, seeds.

Look at your self employment options.


Spending £1000 on comic cons is your choice, but don't complain you don't have money for two hookers. You do. It's just that you're spending it on something else. There are much cheaper hobbies you can have apart from meeting actors. Such as going to evening classes to learn some skills. Skills that you could use in self employment.


Stop seeing yourself as a minimum wage slave.

Stop spending money you don't have. All you get is a short term benefit at the expense of medium and long term stress.

It sounds like what you need is a Road to Damascus event. Some shocking emotional event. That will get you out of your rut. And set you on a new mindset and a new course in your life.
Reply 12
Original post by Anonymous
I work 32hrs a week, at £7.83 an hour (minimum wage).
By the time I get home, im too tired to do anything and I have no friends to go socialising with, and thats if my social anxiety didn't prevent those sort of things in the first place.

As for changing jobs..because yeah its that simple right! Ive worked 17 years in retail. I have no qualifications. All that is around in my area is more part time retail work, care work, call centers (I suffer anxiety on phones) or jobs im not qualified for. And no I cannot go to college for qualifications as I dont have the time with the shift times in work (and to change them would mean id have to sign a flexi contract, to be available at a moments notice for them which I wouldn't be able to be!) nor can I afford it, or have the concentration span for it. So I am literally stuck in a dead end retail job earning minimum wage.

The money I do earn I spend on comic cons and meeting actors, something which I cannot give up (and is about the only non-work thing I do anymore)..I have 3 within the next 6 weeks, and somehow I need to find £1000 for them, which on minimum wage is why ive got a dilemma of which girl to see, as technically I cant really afford to see either!

TIRED AFTER 32HR A WEEK? Jesus, you said like you are 60-65.
My first job over the summer was 48/60hrs and I was still fresh for the weekend.
I think you should take yourself out of this comfortable lifestyle. Go to college, you have 3 days off, join a gym, search for a different job etc.
Firstly, you've got low self esteem if you think you're never going to be with a girl. I have know some ugly fat fellas who have pulled birds way above their station. A bit of charm, charisma, a laugh and good hygiene works wonders. Seriously, come out with me for a few beers and you'll get laid. I am not bragging, you just need to change the mindset.

Back to your dilemma, stop thinking about it too much, toss a coin and let fate decide.

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