So this guy I was seeing a few months back has died. Out of the blue. I saw it on Instagram and Facebook first, and hoped it was a sick joke. Twenty year old guys don’t just die?
We got an email from uni confirming it and I am devastated. Like it ended and it was fine, but I always thought that we would see each other again. He was my first and I really liked him. And now he’s dead I can’t stand it.
I feel guilty for feeling sad, I can’t imagine him not being here. I can’t get my head around it, I’m not sleeping, I can’t eat. Then I feel guilty because what if I had found the balls to send that text? And I feel guilty because if I’m feeling like this how are his close family and friends feeling? Like I am being made to feel guilty by a housemate but I can’t help how I am feeling. I don’t know what todo and no one understands.