The Student Room Group

Why did my GF tell me this? Red flag?

We’ve spent the month living together, but now she’s going home to continue her studies.

We had a deep chat about how things are...

She told me she just wants me to know that she goes out with her friends every couple of weeks and that when she’s drunk she likes dancing with her male friends.

I just told her that it wouldn’t bother me and she should just go and have her fun.

Why did she tell me?
Sounds like she just wants to be open and honest. However maybe she's hinting that if something more than dancing does happen, then it's because she was drunk (which is a lousy excuse, for the record) so she can say "well I did warn you it might happen." That's just how I see it though, obviously I cannot speak for your girlfriend so it'd be more worthwhile to ask her.
Reply 2
Original post by velvethopes
Sounds like she just wants to be open and honest. However maybe she's hinting that if something more than dancing does happen, then it's because she was drunk (which is a lousy excuse, for the record) so she can say "well I did warn you it might happen." That's just how I see it though, obviously I cannot speak for your girlfriend so it'd be more worthwhile to ask her.

There is absolutely no way in hell my GF would do that... if it did happen, the guy would have forced her.

These are male friends for her’s she has said she has no interest in other than friendship... I’m personally not really bothered about it at all - I know she’s a free spirit, that she hasn’t been in a serious relationship before, that she’s crazy (in a very good way), that she has fun, etc... I also know girl’s - hell, everyone needs their free time.

I’m not going to stop her.

She might be dancing with her guy friends, but I know I’m the guy she’s dancing in Ed with :wink:
Original post by Anonymous
There is absolutely no way in hell my GF would do that... if it did happen, the guy would have forced her.

These are male friends for her’s she has said she has no interest in other than friendship... I’m personally not really bothered about it at all - I know she’s a free spirit, that she hasn’t been in a serious relationship before, that she’s crazy (in a very good way), that she has fun, etc... I also know girl’s - hell, everyone needs their free time.

I’m not going to stop her.

She might be dancing with her guy friends, but I know I’m the guy she’s dancing in Ed with :wink:


See, you know her better than anyone on this forum and it's good you trust her. It's unlikely to have been more than just being honest by the sounds of it. Hope she has a good time and best wishes with your relationship!
Reply 4
Original post by velvethopes
See, you know her better than anyone on this forum and it's good you trust her. It's unlikely to have been more than just being honest by the sounds of it. Hope she has a good time and best wishes with your relationship!

We’ve been together for just about 5 months and I can honestly say, I’ve not doubted her. She is honest, and that’s what I like about her - and the fact she bites my lip when kissing me (hot as f)
She's prob encountered the exact sort of jealous type who DOES demand answers like 'WHERE U GOING? WHY CAN'T I COME? WILL THERE BE MEN?'

In terms of cheating...IME people either don't give a fk about their partner or it's an impulse decision, I wouldn;t really expect people to create alibis in advance. Possible a reason she likes dancing with her male pals is she is comfortable around them as opposed to letchy randos.
Reply 6
Original post by StriderHort
She's prob encountered the exact sort of jealous type who DOES demand answers like 'WHERE U GOING? WHY CAN'T I COME? WILL THERE BE MEN?'

In terms of cheating...IME people either don't give a fk about their partner or it's an impulse decision, I wouldn;t really expect people to create alibis in advance. Possible a reason she likes dancing with her male pals is she is comfortable around them as opposed to letchy randos.

She told me the only guy she’s been with before me she was with for 3 months. She didn’t tell me what happened, but I’m not particularly interested anyway.

Maybe she’s sort of testing to see how I react.

Like I told her, she can have as much fun as she wants. Obviously she would know where the lines are.
Doesn't even need to be someones she's been with, 'Pissy insecure controlling partner' is a pretty solid stereotype, plenty of bf/gfs might instantly kick off suddenly seeing FB/Insta pics of their partner dancing with someone else and stuff, sensible to be clear in advance. I doubt i'd read much into it.
Reply 8
Original post by StriderHort
Doesn't even need to be someones she's been with, 'Pissy insecure controlling partner' is a pretty solid stereotype, plenty of bf/gfs might instantly kick off suddenly seeing FB/Insta pics of their partner dancing with someone else and stuff, sensible to be clear in advance. I doubt i'd read much into it.

She has told me about her friends’ relationships. I hope she realises I’m not insecure and/or controlling
Original post by velvethopes
Sounds like she just wants to be open and honest. However maybe she's hinting that if something more than dancing does happen, then it's because she was drunk (which is a lousy excuse, for the record) so she can say "well I did warn you it might happen." That's just how I see it though, obviously I cannot speak for your girlfriend so it'd be more worthwhile to ask her.

+1 agreed
Original post by Anonymous
We’ve spent the month living together, but now she’s going home to continue her studies.

We had a deep chat about how things are...

She told me she just wants me to know that she goes out with her friends every couple of weeks and that when she’s drunk she likes dancing with her male friends.

I just told her that it wouldn’t bother me and she should just go and have her fun.

Why did she tell me?


Thats a red flag...She is lowkey telling you. I'd say you cut your losses and move on. But hey its your choice, you can warn her sternly about it. But at the end...do watever THE **** you wanna do...kek
Wouldn't call it a red flag, sounds like shes just being honest.
If that's how your relationship is 5 months on it's a healthy one. No red flags, maybe she wanted to make you jealous, some girls like it to see their boyfriends jealous. Probably not, from what you said she's honest so she wants to let you know what's going on with her
Reply 13
Original post by Anonymous
We’ve been together for just about 5 months and I can honestly say, I’ve not doubted her. She is honest, and that’s what I like about her - and the fact she bites my lip when kissing me (hot as f)


Your paper thin lips?

Quick Reply

Latest