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Single for six years now

I've been single for six years now and that's long enough. I'm twenty two years old and I feel like I'm going to end up spending the rest of my life single or getting with someone I don't really like out of desperation.

I know most of you are going to say that I'm still young and all of that jargon but that's such a cliche, I'm in my prime at the moment and I want to be with someone. Another cliche is when people give corny advice such as saying let nature take its course or advice like you can't force something to happen, well I've been telling myself that for years now and it doesn't seem to be happening or doing me any good.

All of my friends have had several relationships within the time period of me being single, meanwhile I've had no one. It gets me thinking am I really that bad of a person, I almost feel undateable. I've struggled a bit in the past with making friends I have a few solid friends though that I've known for years.

Every person I know has had at least someone within the last few years and then there's me. In life I've never had much, I had a bad up bringing and have never had what other people have so me having to be single too is really pissing me off. I just want to have what other people have and I don't think that's being selfish.

I've tried dating apps but when I get talking to people it never seems to lead anywhere and they'll stop talking to me after a while. My Facebook is half full of people I've met on dating sites over the years.

I wouldn't say I'm bad looking, I'm just average, I know of people I'm better looking than who don't struggle so it's obviously down to my personality but I'm not willing to change who I am because that's even more pointless. It doesn't help that I'm gay as it's naturally harder to find someone as there aren't as many gay males out there and I'm also not attracted to camp gays and unluckily for me most are camp.

My nan said the other day it would be nice if I found someone but with the way she said it secretly annoyed me, it's almost as if she doesn't think I'm ever going to find anyone neither. I really need some advice on what to do :/

Please don't tell me that I should devote my time to being happy and let nature take its cause because that's been said way too many times before, six years of trying that, yeah it isn't working for me.

What can I do to be more successful in dating? Nobody has even offered to go on a date with me before so that says it all if I can't even get to that stage. One lad agreed to meet me but I left rather quickly / was told to leave when I said I wasn't up for sex on a first meet up.

Ideas??

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Are you in Uni, Job or something else?

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Are you in Uni, Job or something else?

I was in a job until last year but had to leave it due to medical problems, I'm currently waiting on ankle surgery so I don't get out as much so I guess that's one reason to why I'm not being successful but I try to get out as much as possible. I'm usually sociable and doing sociable things when I can though.

Reply 3

CTLeafez

Original post by Anonymous

Nobody has even offered to go on a date with me before so that says it all if I can't even get to that stage.

Take the initiative and ask someone out on a date! :h:

It's the 21st century! Take control of your romantic life. If you fancy someone, ask them out somewhere. Us lads are renown for our inability to gauge subtle hints (and direct ones) from girls, don't rely on us picking up on your interest and pursing you :P

From my own personal experience, which is very similar to yours e.g. 6 years single. I've learnt if you want to pursue someone romantically, you've got to grow a (metaphorical) pair and just ask them! In the last couple years at Uni I've asked out some girls and they've all gave me a chance! I'm not particularly stunning but I guess people like those who put in the effort.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by CTLeafez

Take the initiative and ask someone out on a date! :h:

Actually thinking about it I think my social life could be a bit better, with what you've just said I've been thinking who could I ask and there isn't really anybody to ask, the only people I know are all close friends that I don't like in that way anyway. I need ideas on places that I can meet new people, I'm going to the pub for bonfire night but it isn't really the type of place to go on the pull as it's a family pub lol.

I'm also actually gay so that alone minimizes the amount of people I can ask and I also don't want to ask someone for them to turn our and be straight but at the same time I get where you're coming from, if I don't get asking I'll probably remain single.