I'm turning 24 next week and I'm two years out of university. My first year was spent in Sainsbury's, volunteering at an aquarium, and working as a Learning Mentor at a secondary school.
At the start of the summer, I had accepted a brilliant offer at the school - salaried ITT with my PGCE from September! I felt incredibly lucky, and was excited for September.
Since starting my course in September, I've felt nothing but anxious, I feel like I'm constantly drowning, and with two assignments due in the next two weeks (an essay and evidence for each of the Teaching Standards), I feel like I'm never going to get them done in addition to the four classes I have to assess, mark and log the data for. I'm currently teaching 18 periods a week (having been dropped from 19 as this was the only room for movement) with little observation of myself or of other teachers, and I have never felt so low in myself. My mum has even commented that my self-esteem seems non-existent at the moment, and has asked me to think about whether I want to keep up my training.
My department itself is lovely enough; the head of department can be cold at times and I could do with more guidance from my mentor.
Teaching was never a dream of mine - it was more something I fell into after graduation - and where I enjoyed the couple of classes I had been asked to each before the summer holidays, I cannot categorically state that there is a single class I thoroughly enjoy teaching.
If I decide to come out of my training, I would have to leave at Chrisrmas, but from there I wouldn't know what to do. I've always had an interest in editing and creative writing (my degree is in Literature and Creative Writing), but I fear at 24 years old I've wasted valuable time in gaining experience.
Any help or guidance on whether I should quit or not, and if I should where I can start looking for jobs, would be majorly appreciated!
Wholly moley! 18 periods a week on your first training sesh? That is brutal. I did school direct and you were gently eased in teaching around 10 hours by Xmas which left plenty of time for planning and assignments. I am RQT now and on a full timetable and struggling with that but at least I have had three years getting used to it.
I don't know what the answer is, but it isn't going to get any easier any time soon. I can tell you that by the sound of it, there are easier ways into teaching.