Am I being a mug to take him back? Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 9 months ago
#1
My boyfriend and I were in a happy relationship until, one day of the the blue, he broke up with me, claiming he wasn’t emotionally available and needed time to sort his head out.
Throughout this period, I was there for him everyday, but he was constantly shutting me out and pushing me away. Despite my instincts telling me to leave, I waited patiently.
One day he asked me to go see him. Never had I been so overjoyed in my life. But, when I got there, he decided to tell me the truth... He really broke up with me because he thought I was not reciprocating love back into the relationship due to my trust issues and used this part as a plan to see if I would leave him. He also shared some pretty shocking news with me, as I sat at home every night wondering how I could help him, he met up with a girl he used to speak to and slept with her. Not only this, but he made a few trips to get a Thai massage done. If any of you don’t know, this is a massage where both participants are naturist, and which often turn very sexual. He heavily implied that this resulted in sex but I honestly didn’t have the courage to ask.
Anyway, turns out that his ordeals lead him to realise how much he loved me, and wanted me back. I’m not gonna lie, I’m in such a dilemma where I physically don’t want to leave him since we had such a good thing going. But I know I’m being a right mug, and if this was one of my friends, I’d tell them to leave immediately. What should I do?
0
reply
blobgamage
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#2
Report 9 months ago
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
My boyfriend and I were in a happy relationship until, one day of the the blue, he broke up with me, claiming he wasn’t emotionally available and needed time to sort his head out.
Throughout this period, I was there for him everyday, but he was constantly shutting me out and pushing me away. Despite my instincts telling me to leave, I waited patiently.
One day he asked me to go see him. Never had I been so overjoyed in my life. But, when I got there, he decided to tell me the truth... He really broke up with me because he thought I was not reciprocating love back into the relationship due to my trust issues and used this part as a plan to see if I would leave him. He also shared some pretty shocking news with me, as I sat at home every night wondering how I could help him, he met up with a girl he used to speak to and slept with her. Not only this, but he made a few trips to get a Thai massage done. If any of you don’t know, this is a massage where both participants are naturist, and which often turn very sexual. He heavily implied that this resulted in sex but I honestly didn’t have the courage to ask.
Anyway, turns out that his ordeals lead him to realise how much he loved me, and wanted me back. I’m not gonna lie, I’m in such a dilemma where I physically don’t want to leave him since we had such a good thing going. But I know I’m being a right mug, and if this was one of my friends, I’d tell them to leave immediately. What should I do?
NOPE. Know your worth. He has acted selfishly and very childishly. If he is worried that you are not reciprocating enough, he should communicate that rather than 'test' you as well as sleep with other women. Makes no sense and not worth your time.
0
reply
oglez92
Badges: 13
Rep:
?
#3
Report 9 months ago
#3
(Original post by Anonymous)
My boyfriend and I were in a happy relationship until, one day of the the blue, he broke up with me, claiming he wasn’t emotionally available and needed time to sort his head out.
Throughout this period, I was there for him everyday, but he was constantly shutting me out and pushing me away. Despite my instincts telling me to leave, I waited patiently.
One day he asked me to go see him. Never had I been so overjoyed in my life. But, when I got there, he decided to tell me the truth... He really broke up with me because he thought I was not reciprocating love back into the relationship due to my trust issues and used this part as a plan to see if I would leave him. He also shared some pretty shocking news with me, as I sat at home every night wondering how I could help him, he met up with a girl he used to speak to and slept with her. Not only this, but he made a few trips to get a Thai massage done. If any of you don’t know, this is a massage where both participants are naturist, and which often turn very sexual. He heavily implied that this resulted in sex but I honestly didn’t have the courage to ask.
Anyway, turns out that his ordeals lead him to realise how much he loved me, and wanted me back. I’m not gonna lie, I’m in such a dilemma where I physically don’t want to leave him since we had such a good thing going. But I know I’m being a right mug, and if this was one of my friends, I’d tell them to leave immediately. What should I do?
Hmm that seems unusual. To his credit it seems like he's been very open with you. Do you trust him? What did he mean when he said the love wasn't reciprocated by you?
I guess you've got to decide whether you want to be with him, if things will be different, and if he'll do this again to you.
0
reply
Linalolo
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#4
Report 9 months ago
#4
You are a queen and you deserve to be treated like one. Only be in relationships with someone where you have mutual respect and mutual love for each other. Clearly he didnt love you if he happily had sex with another woman. You deserve someone who wont even touch another woman smh! It is 2018 we arent settling for f*ckboys anymore!
0
reply
patry27
Badges: 16
Rep:
?
#5
Report 9 months ago
#5
I’m sorry but this is not how to deal with a situation like this from his side. To “test” you lol... what. He’s clearly immature and I don’t think he’s the right one for you. I hope you realise your worth and find someone better.
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#6
Report Thread starter 9 months ago
#6
Not really, at the moment I’m finding it really hard to put any more trust in him :/ and by reciprocating, I meant that he thought that I wasn’t feeling the same way as he did.
0
reply
Dunnig Kruger
Badges: 13
Rep:
?
#7
Report 9 months ago
#7
You would be a 2 litre sized mug to take him back.

Don't believe any of his made-up-nonsense about testing you. He just wanted to get laid by other girls. So that's what he went ahead and did.

Go find someone else who doesn't come out with this male bovine excrement.
0
reply
Mubzzz
Badges: 9
Rep:
?
#8
Report 9 months ago
#8
The part about him testing you to see if you really loved him, only for him to go sleeping with other people sounds like absolute bull and completely stupid. Whilst testing to see how much you loved him, he was sleeping with other women? looooooool weird flex but okay. Considering you were'nt together at the time, then he didnt cheat on you. But personally i think the whole testing to see if you loved him is a lie, if he had just wanted to break up for a bit and get with other girls that would have been better, but the whole doing it as a test for u is dumb imo.

If you were to get back with him, would u be fine knowing he slept with other people whilst u were at home worrying about him during your time apart? and u didnt sleep with anyone else?

If i were you, i would sleep with other men before getting back with ur bf or at least bring it up to your bf and see how he reacts, because then things will be fair between you 2 and you're more likely to work again then, and also if he reacts as being against you doing that, then leave his selfish self.

I would say don't get back with him just on the base of the whole "im gonna test how much u love me by breaking up with you and sleeping with other girls" CUS THAT'S JUST FLAT OUT TAKING YOU FOR A MUG LOL, I MEAN THE GUY WENT OUT LOOKING FOR A THAI MASSAGE fgs.

If he hadn't said that, then maybe its ok to consider if u could live together with him again knowing he's slept with other girls, if you could you trust him again? etc Also you should practice the advice you give
Last edited by Mubzzz; 9 months ago
0
reply
mgi
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#9
Report 7 months ago
#9
(Original post by Anonymous)
My boyfriend and I were in a happy relationship until, one day of the the blue, he broke up with me, claiming he wasn’t emotionally available and needed time to sort his head out.
Throughout this period, I was there for him everyday, but he was constantly shutting me out and pushing me away. Despite my instincts telling me to leave, I waited patiently.
One day he asked me to go see him. Never had I been so overjoyed in my life. But, when I got there, he decided to tell me the truth... He really broke up with me because he thought I was not reciprocating love back into the relationship due to my trust issues and used this part as a plan to see if I would leave him. He also shared some pretty shocking news with me, as I sat at home every night wondering how I could help him, he met up with a girl he used to speak to and slept with her. Not only this, but he made a few trips to get a Thai massage done. If any of you don’t know, this is a massage where both participants are naturist, and which often turn very sexual. He heavily implied that this resulted in sex but I honestly didn’t have the courage to ask.
Anyway, turns out that his ordeals lead him to realise how much he loved me, and wanted me back. I’m not gonna lie, I’m in such a dilemma where I physically don’t want to leave him since we had such a good thing going. But I know I’m being a right mug, and if this was one of my friends, I’d tell them to leave immediately. What should I do?
Leave immediately now that he has revealed to you that he is sexually active with other persons!
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Back
to top
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

What's your favourite genre?

Rock (190)
24.05%
Pop (192)
24.3%
Jazz (30)
3.8%
Classical (46)
5.82%
Hip-Hop (150)
18.99%
Electronic (53)
6.71%
Indie (129)
16.33%

Watched Threads

View All