I feel like I need to look like a male model for a girl to like me

So, i’m 20 and in Uni but my experience with girls is of a 12 year old. I have never had a GF, never even hugged or really been friends with a girl.

So that’s my problem, literally 0 experience, and I feel like I need to look super attractive to make up for this. I regularly get hairs cuts like every 2 weeks to help me look my best, I use skin products and have even grown a beard. Tho this has help my confidence it hasn’t done anything to get me anywhere, I have also brought super expensive clothes like Gucci hoodies to hope this will get me some attention. But no, I don’t know if I look super unwelcoming or what not. But people I talk to say I have a great personality, I am a friendly person who loves to make people laugh, so personally wise I think I’m pretty good.

Also sometimes I am super critical of pictures of myself and genuinely make myself believe I am really ugly and how can anybody love that. These thoughts also go through my head whenever I see someone i’m attracted to.

Has anyone got any advise for a hopeless person like me?

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

Get fit rather than wasting your time on that and also dont wear gucci clothes lmao thats kinda cringe worthy

just talk to more girls mate

Reply 2

username4203506

I think confidence is attractive

In the words of RuPaul, if you can’t love yourself then how the hell can you love someone else?

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous

Get fit rather than wasting your time on that and also dont wear gucci clothes lmao thats kinda cringe worthy

just talk to more girls mate

I am fit, I go gym 5 times a week. But the problem is what if they aren’t interested

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Original post by ingrownhair

I think confidence is attractive

In the words of RuPaul, if you can’t love yourself then how the hell can you love someone else?

I don’t know, that’s what i’m tryjng to figure out

You can do it king!

Forget about you. Completely. Stop giving yourself a 2nd thought apart from making sure you're eating and sleeping right and are going to lectures and doing all your assignments on time.

Focus 100% on the people that you see around campus, in the Union and at parties.

The opening post was all about you you you. It's time your thoughts were concentrated on them them them. Particularly every attractive and available young woman that you come across. Lose all your self consciousness. Don't worry about making a fool of yourself. Make the women that you meet feel good about themsleves. Show them that you like them - in the right kind of way. Give them something of value. An amusing anecdote, a joke, an interesting piece of information, a shared fun activity.

On the whole women like men who like them. So show some women that you like them.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

Original post by Dunnig Kruger

Thank you that was very useful

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

Original post by Zasty

You can do it king!

Dayum, thats what you call motivation right there. Thank you

Reply 9

cassiezie

When my boyfriend of 16 months first tried to impress me, he wore his Louis Vuitton belt, fly runners and nice jeans on our first date – I still make fun of him every now and then when remembering that ridiculous flashy belt! It was an amazing outfit that flowed well, but personally, that darn belt made me laugh because I don't like obviously-flashy materialistic things. Since then, he's learned that namebrand isn't always have to be IN YOUR FACE, you can buy simple things that can show you have money/class/good taste without having to buy tons of hoodies with "Gucci" plastered across the front! Both of us come from hard working parents and lovely close-knit families, yes there's money but it's a secondary thing, money is never as important as true attraction and a great personality. My man LOVES to look good, and I LOVE his awesome sense of style, but my point is: don't try to flex too hard right away. Namebrands aren't everything, a beard isn't everything, going to the gym isn't everything! I too go to the gym, wear nice clothes, enjoy styling my hair in a way to make me feel beautiful/happy, yet I also struggle with my self-confidence almost everyday! Personality is key: find something that you love to do, educate yourself on an interesting topic, follow the news, have some jokes up your sleeve! I love making people laugh, and I love discussing politics/science/books… if a man goes up to a potential partner exuding confidence (not arrogance, there's a big difference) and can hold an awesome, educated conversation, you're guaranteed to score some numbers or at least have a good time! Self-confidence comes from being kind to others, making them smile/enjoy their night, and feeling good about your outfit/looks/conversations! I believe in you! Good luck!