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Can someone please grade my Jekyll and Hyde essay and give some feedback. Thanks.

I was wondering if someone could grade my Jekyll and Hyde essay and give feedback to improve as I'm stuck with a supply teacher in english and I really need someone to help. I would really appreciate it thank you.
This is for the AQA exam board
Question: How is Hyde presented as a disturbing character?

In "The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde", Stevenson presents Hyde as disturbing , evil and a threat to society.

One of the most effective ways Stevenson illustrates how disturbing Hyde is through his behaviour. For example, in the beginning of the novella, Hyde "calmly, trampled" over a little girl. The violent verb "trampled" has connotations of a horse, presenting Hyde's brute strength (that is similar to a horse) and the adverb "calmly" demonstrates how remorseless he was about this. This shows us that Hyde is but pure evil and emphasises that he is like "Satan". It also makes the reader fear and question what is Hyde going to do next as his remorseless attitude could mean that he might take part in some serious crimes.

Additionally, Enfield explains that there was "something wrong with Hyde's appearance... something downright detestable" even he says that "I scarce know why". This quotation hints that there is unusual evil within Hyde as Enfield doesn't know what makes him feel so uncomfortable and disturbed about Hyde.

Another way Stevenson presents Hyde as disturbing is through his animal-like behaviour. Throughout the novella, Hyde is constantly described like an animal. For instance, Hyde is described as having "ape-like fury". In this simile, the primitive noun "ape" presents Hyde as a devolved person or "creature" in Victorian society that is destructive. The keyword "ape" further emphasises his brute strength and "fury"that may cause shock and concern to a pious audience. In the Victorian era, Darwin published his theory of evolution which would have caused distress in the highly religious Victorian society so Hyde being this devolved "creature" may support the idea of Darwin's theory. This means that people wouldn't want to associate with something evil that goes against God.

Along with being described as "ape-like", Hyde is also describe as being a "deformity". Having a "deformity" or a disability was seen as sinful and disturbing in the Victorian times, further emphasising Hyde's pure evil. Perhaps Hyde is disturbing because of his lack of ability to communicate with society; an "ape" can't communicate to society and wouldn't be civilised enough to fit in Victorian society. Because Hyde is incapable of communicating with society he may be frustrated which is why he commits the sinful acts that he does.
(edited 5 years ago)
Reply 1
This is a very good attempt in that there's clear focus on the question, and you've tried to explain the effects on the reader and what Stevenson's intentions were. You've written it in an organised manner as well with the PEE structure per paragraph. I think the context could have been a bit more consistent and so maybe include some in the first paragraph and the additional points. But this is a high level response dw. Maybe you could also include some links across the text to show a detailed understanding (for example the trampling is foreshadowing on Stevenson's part to give an indication to the reader of the lengths Hyde's willing to go, as he develops in character throughout the text to feel more confident in his actions by no longer wishing to conceal his differences to everyone else and conform to society's rules, shown by his brutal murder of Carew later on, suggesting his complex, ruthless and disturbing nature. This is also reinforced by *insert quote* and etc. etc.) But that depends on the marks and AOwhatever the question asks about. Wow this is long, hope this helped anyway haha
Original post by Kim H
This is a very good attempt in that there's clear focus on the question, and you've tried to explain the effects on the reader and what Stevenson's intentions were. You've written it in an organised manner as well with the PEE structure per paragraph. I think the context could have been a bit more consistent and so maybe include some in the first paragraph and the additional points. But this is a high level response dw. Maybe you could also include some links across the text to show a detailed understanding (for example the trampling is foreshadowing on Stevenson's part to give an indication to the reader of the lengths Hyde's willing to go, as he develops in character throughout the text to feel more confident in his actions by no longer wishing to conceal his differences to everyone else and conform to society's rules, shown by his brutal murder of Carew later on, suggesting his complex, ruthless and disturbing nature. This is also reinforced by *insert quote* and etc. etc.) But that depends on the marks and AOwhatever the question asks about. Wow this is long, hope this helped anyway haha


Thank you very much! This type of advice and feedback is what I was looking for to improve my work. It's really difficult when you son't have a proper English teacher teaching you.
Reply 3
Original post by Mohammed0786
Thank you very much! This type of advice and feedback is what I was looking for to improve my work. It's really difficult when you son't have a proper English teacher teaching you.

Yh I relate, supply teachers are always clueless lmao
Reply 4
Question: How is Hyde presented as a disturbing character?

In "The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde", Stevenson presents Hyde as disturbing , evil and a threat to society.

One of the most effective ways Stevenson illustrates how disturbing Hyde is through his behaviour. For example, in the beginning of the novella, Hyde "calmly, trampled" over a little girl. The violent verb "trampled" has connotations of a horse, presenting Hyde's brute strength (that is similar to a horse) and the adverb "calmly" demonstrates how remorseless he was about this. This shows us that Hyde is but pure evil and emphasises that he is like "Satan". It also makes the reader fear and question what is Hyde going to do next as his remorseless attitude could mean that he might take part in some serious crimes.
1. The underlined sentences are just assertion. You do not demonstrate how the language makes you come to these conclusion.
2. The Satan reference is a little overboard.

Additionally, Enfield explains that there was "something wrong with Hyde's appearance... something downright detestable" even he says that "I scarce know why". This quotation hints that there is unusual evil within Hyde as Enfield doesn't know what makes him feel so uncomfortable and disturbed about Hyde.
1. Better if you show how the language used makes you think that there is evil within Hyde.

Another way Stevenson presents Hyde as disturbing is through his animal-like behaviour. Throughout the novella, Hyde is constantly described like an animal. For instance, Hyde is described as having "ape-like fury". In this simile, the primitive noun "ape" presents Hyde as a devolved person or "creature" in Victorian society that is destructive. The keyword "ape" further emphasises his brute strength and "fury"that may cause shock and concern to a pious audience. In the Victorian era, Darwin published his theory of evolution which would have caused distress in the highly religious Victorian society so Hyde being this devolved "creature" may support the idea of Darwin's theory. This means that people wouldn't want to associate with something evil that goes against God.
1. I believe the “ape” reference comes from the murder of Sir Danvers Carew. Might have also mentioned that the maid was inside a house and in her bedroom with the windows closed yet she could hear Carew’s bones being broken.That is a further reference to the brutality of the killing.

Along with being described as "ape-like", Hyde is also describe as being a "deformity". Having a "deformity" or a disability was seen as sinful and disturbing in the Victorian times, further emphasising Hyde's pure evil. Perhaps Hyde is disturbing because of his lack of ability to communicate with society; an "ape" can't communicate to society and wouldn't be civilised enough to fit in Victorian society. Because Hyde is incapable of communicating with society he may be frustrated which is why he commits the sinful acts that he does.
1. O.k. but actually with no references this is just assertion - just your ideas with no details and elaboration

I work in the Scottish system, so I am not fully acquainted with GCSE marking. So I cannot say precisely what mark you might achive. However i suspect it might be a pass - though not an outstanding pass.

Your knowledge of the text is basic. There is no great depth in your analysis. That is an observation and not a criticism of you. I jave written notes on the Novella. You will find my booklet with the link. I will leave the link open until Sunday. If you get a virus alarm, there is no virus on the site. It is a clash between your OS and browser and my site. Anyway you might find what I write broadens your approach to the novella.

Link to File:-
https://www.transferbigfiles.com/b35b126d-e36d-424b-a88f-6b34410e52f8/nqAgZpUkvWRkQee2l2DmAw2
(edited 5 years ago)
Original post by jamesg2
Question: How is Hyde presented as a disturbing character?

In "The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde", Stevenson presents Hyde as disturbing , evil and a threat to society.

One of the most effective ways Stevenson illustrates how disturbing Hyde is through his behaviour. For example, in the beginning of the novella, Hyde "calmly, trampled" over a little girl. The violent verb "trampled" has connotations of a horse, presenting Hyde's brute strength (that is similar to a horse) and the adverb "calmly" demonstrates how remorseless he was about this. This shows us that Hyde is but pure evil and emphasises that he is like "Satan". It also makes the reader fear and question what is Hyde going to do next as his remorseless attitude could mean that he might take part in some serious crimes.
1. The underlined sentences are just assertion. You do not demonstrate how the language makes you come to these conclusion.
2. The Satan reference is a little overboard.

Additionally, Enfield explains that there was "something wrong with Hyde's appearance... something downright detestable" even he says that "I scarce know why". This quotation hints that there is unusual evil within Hyde as Enfield doesn't know what makes him feel so uncomfortable and disturbed about Hyde.
1. Better if you show how the language used makes you think that there is evil within Hyde.

Another way Stevenson presents Hyde as disturbing is through his animal-like behaviour. Throughout the novella, Hyde is constantly described like an animal. For instance, Hyde is described as having "ape-like fury". In this simile, the primitive noun "ape" presents Hyde as a devolved person or "creature" in Victorian society that is destructive. The keyword "ape" further emphasises his brute strength and "fury"that may cause shock and concern to a pious audience. In the Victorian era, Darwin published his theory of evolution which would have caused distress in the highly religious Victorian society so Hyde being this devolved "creature" may support the idea of Darwin's theory. This means that people wouldn't want to associate with something evil that goes against God.
1. I believe the “ape” reference comes from the murder of Sir Danvers Carew. Might have also mentioned that the maid was inside a house and in her bedroom with the windows closed yet she could hear Carew’s bones being broken.That is a further reference to the brutality of the killing.

Along with being described as "ape-like", Hyde is also describe as being a "deformity". Having a "deformity" or a disability was seen as sinful and disturbing in the Victorian times, further emphasising Hyde's pure evil. Perhaps Hyde is disturbing because of his lack of ability to communicate with society; an "ape" can't communicate to society and wouldn't be civilised enough to fit in Victorian society. Because Hyde is incapable of communicating with society he may be frustrated which is why he commits the sinful acts that he does.
1. O.k. but actually with no references this is just assertion - just your ideas with no details and elaboration

I work in the Scottish system, so I am not fully acquainted with GCSE marking. So I cannot say precisely what mark you might achive. However i suspect it might be a pass - though not an outstanding pass.

Your knowledge of the text is basic. There is no great depth in your analysis. That is an observation and not a criticism of you. I jave written notes on the Novella. You will find my booklet with the link. I will leave the link open until Sunday. If you get a virus alarm, there is no virus on the site. It is a clash between your OS and browser and my site. Anyway you might find what I write broadens your approach to the novella.

Link to File:-
https://www.transferbigfiles.com/b35b126d-e36d-424b-a88f-6b34410e52f8/nqAgZpUkvWRkQee2l2DmAw2


Thank you very much. I really appreciate this feedback or anything really as I dont know what Im doing half of the time in class because our teacher is absent. I really cant thank you enough for how much this helps! Do you have resources for Macbeth by any chance?
Reply 6
I am in the process of writing my Macbeth notes. So at the moment I do not have any.
Oh okay. Thank you anyway.
while you have a good understanding of the text, your analysis could definitely have a bit more depth to it eg. in the second paragraph your analysis is very brief. talk about the mystery and lack of knowledge enfield has over hyde, yet is somehow disgusted by him- it's a rather irrational way of thinking; and what was valued in victorian times? rationality. also his inability to identify anything specificially displeasing to him suggests that evil can be manifest themselves in different ways to different people- there's no clear way to identify it for everybody.
Original post by entertainmyfaith
while you have a good understanding of the text, your analysis could definitely have a bit more depth to it eg. in the second paragraph your analysis is very brief. talk about the mystery and lack of knowledge enfield has over hyde, yet is somehow disgusted by him- it's a rather irrational way of thinking; and what was valued in victorian times? rationality. also his inability to identify anything specificially displeasing to him suggests that evil can be manifest themselves in different ways to different people- there's no clear way to identify it for everybody.

Thank you for the feedback. Do you have any resources for Jekyll and Hyde I can use by any chance. I’m really struggling to find stuff. I would really apreciate it.
Original post by Mohammed0786
Thank you for the feedback. Do you have any resources for Jekyll and Hyde I can use by any chance. I’m really struggling to find stuff. I would really apreciate it.

yes, i created a guide to jekyll and hyde- if you go in the english forum and look at the helpful threads forum (it'll be near the top) and click on the link to guide to j+h, it should take you to the thread. (if you need any help don't be afraid to ask)
Original post by Kim H
You've written it in an organised manner as well with the PEE structure per paragraph.


Wait, PEE shows organisation? I'd agree with AQA here when they say that this tends 'to limit the lines of enquiry'.
(edited 5 years ago)
Original post by entertainmyfaith
yes, i created a guide to jekyll and hyde- if you go in the english forum and look at the helpful threads forum (it'll be near the top) and click on the link to guide to j+h, it should take you to the thread. (if you need any help don't be afraid to ask)


Thanks!
Wow
COULD SOMEONE PLEASE GRADE MY PIECE I HAVE BEEN REVISING FOR EXAM ON THIS IM UN YR 10 PLSSS RESPOND Stevenson Presents Mr. Hyde as a very evil and monstrous person. In the text it states that “ape like fury”. This is a Zoomorphism as it describes Hyde as an ape with a wild animal characteristics and looks. In addition, this implies that Hyde is angry and uncontrollable and could be capable of much wrongdoings. The Zoomorphism is effective because it shows that Hyde has no decorum and is a monstrous evil character. This reflects to the context in the 19th century as Victorian men were supposed to act in a respectfully and civilized manner.Stevenson Present Hyde as a Devillish and Evil person in the novella. In the text it states that “Little man trampled calmly over the child’s body…”. This is a Juxtaposition as it shows that the brutal murder occuring and the adverb to describe Hyde’s actions and. The Juxtaposition is effective because it implies that Hyde is extremely monstrous and has no respect for anyone. This reflects to the context in the 19th century where men during the victorian times were expected to behave in an appropiate manner and to show respectable actions. Futhermore this was a christian society where men were expected to be civillized.Stevenson presents Hyde as destructive and abnormal.In the text it states that “really like satan”. This is a simile as it shows that Hyde is been directly compared to Satan’s. This also contrasts that Hyde is an abominable human being who doesn’t really have a conscience. The connotations of “satan” shows that he is evil and will have no remorse what so ever. This reflects to the context in the 19th century were Victorian men were suppose to act in a respectfull orderly manner mean whilst Hyde is a disgrace and has no respect. Also Victorian Era was a christian society so people were meant to do good deeds follow the christian teachings and be respectful towards others. Stevenson presents Mr Hyde as a disgusting and horrific character in the novella. In the text it states that “my devil has been long caged he came out rawr”. This is a personification as it suggests that Hyde is epitome of evil and and petrifying. This also implies that the author is personifying his desires. Furthermore the word “caged” embodies the repression of Hyde.This also reflects to the christian society in the victorian times where people would be shamed for the bad behaviours and actions.
GCSESTUDENAHMAD,

You might want to re-think your listing of literary features. Basically your essay reads as a descriptions of Stevenson’s literary descriptive devices and limited character understanding. I believe your essay could do with some more character development.

I believe readers often misunderstand the use of the conjunction in the title to describe two different people when it is two different sides of the same person: Dr. Jekyll. Mr Hyde is Dr. Jekyll in a different form. Because the pharmacological potion has the ability to change the bodies physical structure, it thus suggests two different characters rather than the same character in a different form.The problem is compounded by the fact that Utterson and Lanyon - old friends of Dr Jekyll - do not recognise Dr Jekyll when he is Mr. Hyde.

So all you say about Mr Hyde refers to Dr. Jekyll. The “good” Dr Jekyll is a revered and appreciated doctor. Mr. Hyde is the “bad” Dr. Jekyll. Because his body has undergone a physical change nobody realises that Mr Hyde is actually Dr. Jekyll.

That is the point of the story. Through the story Stevenson suggests we all have within us the ability to be a Dr Jekyll or a Mr. Hyde.
Original post by jamesg2
GCSESTUDENAHMAD,

You might want to re-think your listing of literary features. Basically your essay reads as a descriptions of Stevenson’s literary descriptive devices and limited character understanding. I believe your essay could do with some more character development.

I believe readers often misunderstand the use of the conjunction in the title to describe two different people when it is two different sides of the same person: Dr. Jekyll. Mr Hyde is Dr. Jekyll in a different form. Because the pharmacological potion has the ability to change the bodies physical structure, it thus suggests two different characters rather than the same character in a different form.The problem is compounded by the fact that Utterson and Lanyon - old friends of Dr Jekyll - do not recognise Dr Jekyll when he is Mr. Hyde.

So all you say about Mr Hyde refers to Dr. Jekyll. The “good” Dr Jekyll is a revered and appreciated doctor. Mr. Hyde is the “bad” Dr. Jekyll. Because his body has undergone a physical change nobody realises that Mr Hyde is actually Dr. Jekyll.

That is the point of the story. Through the story Stevenson suggests we all have within us the ability to be a Dr Jekyll or a Mr. Hyde.

thank you for the reply but main thing is what grade would you give it from 1-9 please tell me so i can work on it more
I am sorry but I cannot give you a good grade. I assume the question you are addressing is “How does Stevenson present Mr Hyde?”

Your answer is essentially a series points that are often introduced by the pronoun “this.”. It needed you to indicate what the “this” referred to.

Your answer also contains no narrative about Mt Hyde’s character Though I do not agree with your analysis there is no theme about how you see Mr. Hyde - just a series of disjointed ideas..

Grade 4 represents a bare pass. What you have written does not represent the quality expected by a Grade 4. Put simply you have not answered the question. How do you see Mr. Hyde? What are his good points - what are his bad points. Is there nothing you can say in his defence? To be fair the only thing that can be said in Hyde’s defence is that Jekyll released him making him a living entity. It was not Hyde that did that.

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