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how often should you text your boyfriend/girlfriend?

I've been with my boyfriend about 7 months now, we don't live together but we aren't long distance and see each other once a week. He works long hours in a demanding job (10-11 hours a day), I'm at uni and have more free time. I like communicating with him everyday even just a little. He prefers texting to phone calls.

I try to touch base with him everyday just saying hi, asking how he is, if he ate, how work is going etc, but I don't want to annoy or pester him whilst he's at work if you know what I mean. He usually responds quickly and doesn't complain. In the past when he didn't text as much I'd feel like he was losing interest and he'd reassure me that isn't the case, it's just work stressing him out sometimes and he gets tired. What's a decent amount to text? I'd ask but maybe it's a weird thing to ask lol. I'm an overthinker.
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Anonymous #1
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see that's his mindset too I think. He doesn't really text unless he wants to arrange plans with me, he's very practical. I found this hard to adjust to in the beginning as my ex wanted constant contact or he would get really annoyed with me. For example, he'd want me to call him in the morning, in every work break, before I slept AND text throughout the day and reply within an hour time frame. If I didn't, he'd say I was a crap girlfriend and didn't give him enough attention. Hence, when I met my current bf I didn't want him to think I make little to no effort and don't care so I felt confused. Maybe it just depends on the man then.

It's true when we text loads, we don't have much to speak about in person and when we don't text for a while, we've so much to speak of when we see each other, which is better really.
Original post by Anonymous
I've been with my boyfriend about 7 months now, we don't live together but we aren't long distance and see each other once a week. He works long hours in a demanding job (10-11 hours a day), I'm at uni and have more free time. I like communicating with him everyday even just a little. He prefers texting to phone calls.

I try to touch base with him everyday just saying hi, asking how he is, if he ate, how work is going etc, but I don't want to annoy or pester him whilst he's at work if you know what I mean. He usually responds quickly and doesn't complain. In the past when he didn't text as much I'd feel like he was losing interest and he'd reassure me that isn't the case, it's just work stressing him out sometimes and he gets tired. What's a decent amount to text? I'd ask but maybe it's a weird thing to ask lol. I'm an overthinker.


I text my boyfriend almost constantly whenever we are both awake really (we are long distance with a time difference) if we can't call each other, so it's a little different. When we are together though we live together and so we only text each other if we need to ask a question or tell each other something if we aren't physically together at that time.

The amount you're texting him sounds good. It's good to keep in touch daily and communicate feelings etc.
Me and my boyfriend text each other every day, always have. We're a bit long distance (he goes to boarding school) and when we are actually physically together we text each other very little, but still always at least once a day. The longest we've gone without communicating since the beginning of our relationship is about 24 hours, but that was when his phone wasn't working properly.
Original post by Anonymous
I've been with my boyfriend about 7 months now, we don't live together but we aren't long distance and see each other once a week. He works long hours in a demanding job (10-11 hours a day), I'm at uni and have more free time. I like communicating with him everyday even just a little. He prefers texting to phone calls.

I try to touch base with him everyday just saying hi, asking how he is, if he ate, how work is going etc, but I don't want to annoy or pester him whilst he's at work if you know what I mean. He usually responds quickly and doesn't complain. In the past when he didn't text as much I'd feel like he was losing interest and he'd reassure me that isn't the case, it's just work stressing him out sometimes and he gets tired. What's a decent amount to text? I'd ask but maybe it's a weird thing to ask lol. I'm an overthinker.

I'm probably in a similar situation to you.
See my bf about once a week ish, he works and i'm at uni, but we are both 9 to 5 - we do fb message everyday and talk about what we are doing/random conversations, it's nice to keep us connected while we are apart
Its not constant messaging, as we both have meetings or he might be on site, but it's nice - i'm sure if I annoyed him, he would tell me
I don't think we run out of things to say each other when we do meet, as we discuss other stuff, or share funny stories from the past

All depends on the couple how mch you talk when you aren't together, theres no right or wrong answer

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