The Student Room Group

Flatmate might have a crush on me

I'm in private accommodation with 3 other guys and another girl. One of them is quite a bit older than me, in his mid-late twenties (I'm 18). He is constantly knocking on my door for a chat, which I don't particularly mind, except I usually have sh** to do and I'm also heavily introverted lol. He doesn't do this with the other girl (or guys).

He's also started insisting that we go out to eat sometime. He asks me every evening and also messages me in the morning. This is vaguely uncomfortable for me; I'm not looking for a relationship, he's quite a bit older than me, I have to LIVE with him. I always try to stay civil with my flatmates, but as mean as this may sound, I've never really wanted to be close friends with them. I like treating them as acquaintances because it gives me my own space.

Another one of my flatmates informed me that whenever I'm out, he is always asking where I'm at, which is a little creepy. I'm kind of worried because the only other girl will be moving out soon and this guys friend will move in, I'll be the only girl. Any advice?

Biggest issue is that he doesn't speak English well, at all. We can barely understand each other, so I'm not really sure how to approach this.
It sounds more than a crush: something more like infatuation, though perhaps not as far as that. I would be careful. Make him know that he makes you feel uncomfortable, or try to stay clear from him.
Reply 2
Original post by Lilligant22
It sounds more than a crush: something more like infatuation, though perhaps not as far as that. I would be careful. Make him know that he makes you feel uncomfortable, or try to stay clear from him.


It's sort of hard to stay away from him as we literally live together. And he's knocking on my door every evening. I can't really ignore him because
1. There's a gap in my door, the light shines through so he can see if I'm in or not
2. I don't want things to get hostile between us as I'll be living with him for the next 6 months:frown:
Original post by Anonymous
It's sort of hard to stay away from him as we literally live together. And he's knocking on my door every evening. I can't really ignore him because
1. There's a gap in my door, the light shines through so he can see if I'm in or not
2. I don't want things to get hostile between us as I'll be living with him for the next 6 months:frown:

I see what you mean. I think perhaps the best thing to do is to just be friendly but friendzone him if anything happens or excusing yourself if he wants you to do things that make you feel uncomfortable. I think you just need to tolerate him.

If you have any troubles, feel free to PM me. :smile:
Original post by Anonymous
I'm in private accommodation with 3 other guys and another girl. One of them is quite a bit older than me, in his mid-late twenties (I'm 18). He is constantly knocking on my door for a chat, which I don't particularly mind, except I usually have sh** to do and I'm also heavily introverted lol. He doesn't do this with the other girl (or guys).

He's also started insisting that we go out to eat sometime. He asks me every evening and also messages me in the morning. This is vaguely uncomfortable for me; I'm not looking for a relationship, he's quite a bit older than me, I have to LIVE with him. I always try to stay civil with my flatmates, but as mean as this may sound, I've never really wanted to be close friends with them. I like treating them as acquaintances because it gives me my own space.

Another one of my flatmates informed me that whenever I'm out, he is always asking where I'm at, which is a little creepy. I'm kind of worried because the only other girl will be moving out soon and this guys friend will move in, I'll be the only girl. Any advice?

Biggest issue is that he doesn't speak English well, at all. We can barely understand each other, so I'm not really sure how to approach this.


I'd keep telling him you're busy so maybe he'll grow out of the habit of pestering you! He might have harmless intentions and just wants to be good friends but if it's annoying you then hopefully this will make him calm down. It's best not to do anything too drastic if you have to live with him!

Lucy

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