My brother insults and shouts at my mum - does this make him abusive? Watch

Anonymous #1
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My 20 year old brother calls my mum horrible names and shouts at her. Over something minor like her not doing his washing. He has also hit her in the past and made her bleed.

Does this make him abusive towards her?
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Notoriety
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Why?
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mongodb
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Yes. What kind of person hits their own mother?
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JohanGRK
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it does
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Analyst89
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If it makes her bleed then it is abusive behaviour. It is very unacceptable behaviour. However he must have a lot of issues going on with him to act like that. Although he's behaviour is unacceptable. Maybe you could talk to him why he acts like this?
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victoriu
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My brother yells at my mum too and hits her and he is 8. I am actually concerned.
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UrWelcome
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no he has an atitude problem, gets annoyed very quickly and is a pessimistic person; i doubt he's actively/knowingly abusive. Best way to deal with this is to have a talk about it face to face , get his actions sorted out no matter how much he complains he needs to be shown what he's doing is wrong; he probably knows he's acting like crap too, just considerately explain to him; if he chooses to lash out, then he is indeed abusive and requires special attention
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marple
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My 20 year old brother calls my mum horrible names and shouts at her. Over something minor like her not doing his washing. He has also hit her in the past and made her bleed.

Does this make him abusive towards her?
This is domestic violence and you should encourage your mother to get support, and if possible get him out of the house.

Your brother needs to wake up to what he's doing - if he treats his mother like this what is he going to do to a wife and children in the future?

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/fa...nce-and-abuse/
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by marple)
This is domestic violence and you should encourage your mother to get support, and if possible get him out of the house.

Your brother needs to wake up to what he's doing - if he treats his mother like this what is he going to do to a wife and children in the future?

https://www.citizensadvice.org.uk/fa...nce-and-abuse/
My mother will say he is innocent. I don't know what is wrong with her but she says things like there's nothing wrong with him he is slightly rude. I highly doubt she would want to get help.

I sincerely feel sorry for whoever ends up marrying my brother. I will do my best to warn them without being at risk myself because he has also hit me in the past.

Do you think his behaviour is worrying and that he could be a danger to my mum and me in the future?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by UrWelcome)
no he has an atitude problem, gets annoyed very quickly and is a pessimistic person; i doubt he's actively/knowingly abusive. Best way to deal with this is to have a talk about it face to face , get his actions sorted out no matter how much he complains he needs to be shown what he's doing is wrong; he probably knows he's acting like crap too, just considerately explain to him; if he chooses to lash out, then he is indeed abusive and requires special attention
I don't know how to do that.

My sister and I have both mentioned to him that we believe he has anger management issues to which he says I don't because she (my mum) is the only person he has issues with
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marple
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(Original post by Anonymous)
My mother will say he is innocent. I don't know what is wrong with her but she says things like there's nothing wrong with him he is slightly rude. I highly doubt she would want to get help.

I sincerely feel sorry for whoever ends up marrying my brother. I will do my best to warn them without being at risk myself because he has also hit me in the past.

Do you think his behaviour is worrying and that he could be a danger to my mum and me in the future?
There is clearly something wrong. An adult son is normally protective of a mother who loves and helps him. For him to be so abusive and threatening is not normal and it's not okay. Your mother shouldn't have to put up with this behaviour and neither should you.

Violence within a family when the culprit is an adult is domestic violence and, if you choose to get the law involved, there are consequences. Your mother is doing him no favours by making excuses for him. His behaviour is not acceptable - or legal - and he needs to understand that and change.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by marple)
There is clearly something wrong. An adult son is normally protective of a mother who loves and helps him. For him to be so abusive and threatening is not normal and it's not okay. Your mother shouldn't have to put up with this behaviour and neither should you.

Violence within a family when the culprit is an adult is domestic violence and, if you choose to get the law involved, there are consequences. Your mother is doing him no favours by making excuses for him. His behaviour is not acceptable - or legal - and he needs to understand that and change.
She get my sister to call the police on him when he attacked her but then when the police come she says I don't want to press charges. I don't care because I have plans to leave home for uni and i'm planning to get away from all of them.
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