My bf went thru my phone HELP !! Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
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#1
To cut the story short ...

We were together in bed ... we just had sex and were laying there just chatting away...

So he asked me for my phone as I promised him once over the phone on how he was able to see who I spoke to etc in case he didn’t trust me because there were days where he’d have doubts about me talking to other boys...

Anyway he went thru all my DMs on Instagram which were all good and he then went over to my snapchat and saw I was chatting to this one guy..


Before you say anything this one guy was flirting yes but I only saw him as a friend ... he replied to a pic of mine saying I looked good and how he wanted to talk to me over the phone ...


I replied to him ok he could ring later on ... I didn’t have any intentions of it being flirty or in that way as I love my bf very much and I just saw this other guy as friend...

My bf read the convo and asked me and I told him he’s just a friend and my bf didn’t really react but I could see it was like someone slapped him on the face he seemed a bit down and didn’t really talk to me much after ....

So I went home he spoke to me but seemed very not himself it’s like he was been put off...


The next couple of days he rang me a few times then a week later he stopped contacting me ..

I asked him why he didn’t text or ring me and he said he was just too busy with work and had a lot on his mind and it was nothing to do with this guy or the convo he read...

I’m so confused he’s being so distant towards me!!

He still wants to meet up with me but he won’t take the time out to talk to me like before ..

Why is he doing this!

What do I do!

HELP IT KILLS
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Lilligant22
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#2
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Meet up with him and bring it up there. Tell him that he should believe you. If you want to go to extreme measures, tell him that you'll delete the guy if he doesn't believe you (although this is a bit much and I don't think I'd do it myself).

Give him the reason that you wouldn't let him look through your phone if you were cheating on him. This seems like a common sense thing. Hopefully, this is just a small blunder.
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Rock Fan
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(Original post by Anonymous)
To cut the story short ...

We were together in bed ... we just had sex and were laying there just chatting away...

So he asked me for my phone as I promised him once over the phone on how he was able to see who I spoke to etc in case he didn’t trust me because there were days where he’d have doubts about me talking to other boys...

Anyway he went thru all my DMs on Instagram which were all good and he then went over to my snapchat and saw I was chatting to this one guy..


Before you say anything this one guy was flirting yes but I only saw him as a friend ... he replied to a pic of mine saying I looked good and how he wanted to talk to me over the phone ...


I replied to him ok he could ring later on ... I didn’t have any intentions of it being flirty or in that way as I love my bf very much and I just saw this other guy as friend...

My bf read the convo and asked me and I told him he’s just a friend and my bf didn’t really react but I could see it was like someone slapped him on the face he seemed a bit down and didn’t really talk to me much after ....

So I went home he spoke to me but seemed very not himself it’s like he was been put off...


The next couple of days he rang me a few times then a week later he stopped contacting me ..

I asked him why he didn’t text or ring me and he said he was just too busy with work and had a lot on his mind and it was nothing to do with this guy or the convo he read...

I’m so confused he’s being so distant towards me!!

He still wants to meet up with me but he won’t take the time out to talk to me like before ..

Why is he doing this!

What do I do!

HELP IT KILLS
He has trust issues
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Rock Fan)
He has trust issues
Yhh I know he does but what do I do... he puts no effort in anymore... he’s saying he extremely busy with work and what not which i get but do you think lowkey it’s to do with the fact he saw me speaking to someone else ?
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xoxAngel_Kxox
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First of all, if I had a boyfriend (I say if, I do) and someone messaged me being flirty on Snapchat asking could they phone me, I'd say no. I would know his intentions behind that conversation.

But.. it's never a good idea for an insecure person to look through their partner's phone (secure people probably wouldn't even ask to) because when you're insecure you're looking for something, and you'll find it - you'll read things into even innocent conversations because you're expecting to find something there. If he's asking to look, he's paranoid, and tbh relationships shouldn't be like that. It's not healthy.
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Acsel
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yhh I know he does but what do I do... he puts no effort in anymore... he’s saying he extremely busy with work and what not which i get but do you think lowkey it’s to do with the fact he saw me speaking to someone else ?
Probably. If he doesn't trust you enough that he wants to go through your phone, then he's almost certainly going to take something like that the wrong way. To be fair to him, it is easy to see how that could be misinterpreted. But relationships are built on trust. He doesn't seem to trust you, so this relationship is unlikely to last.

Yes, you sent a message that could be misinterpreted. But you are allowed to talk to whoever you want. Your boyfriend shouldn't be so mistrusting in the first place. Looking at this logically, if you really were cheating, you'd hardly want to let your boyfriend look through your phone. The issue is almost entirely with your boyfriend, not your actions.
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Lady Jamie
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Ah, the classic trust issues - I've always found the need to go through your partner's phone to be an alarm bell. It is definitely an area you guys need to speak about asap.

That being said, I personally would not bother responding to flirty messages if I were in a relationship, let alone call them back. Your intentions might be pure but his reaction is also not completely unreasonable.
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tashkent46
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(Original post by Lady Jamie)
Ah, the classic trust issues - I've always found the need to go through your partner's phone to be an alarm bell. It is definitely an area you guys need to speak about asap.

That being said, I personally would not bother responding to flirty messages if I were in a relationship, let alone call them back. Your intentions might be pure but his reaction is also not completely unreasonable.
I'm not cheating I'm just arranging a secret phone call with some random on Snapchat who's only interest and connection to me is he thinks I'm fit. Honest no cheating.
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xoxAngel_Kxox
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(Original post by tashkent46)
I'm not cheating I'm just arranging a secret phone call with some random on Snapchat who's only interest and connection to me is he thinks I'm fit. Honest no cheating.
If you're making a phonecall that you need to keep secret, there's a problem. I'm not saying that you need to tell him everyone you talk to, or tell him what you talk about, but if you feel like you can't tell him you're calling this guy, you need to think carefully about what it means.
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Lady Jamie
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(Original post by tashkent46)
I'm not cheating I'm just arranging a secret phone call with some random on Snapchat who's only interest and connection to me is he thinks I'm fit. Honest no cheating.
:facepalm:

Am I getting too old or are you just trolling me?
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Acsel
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There's a ton of ambiguity here about the other guy. He was flirty and she sees him as a friend. So is this a total stranger, that you're willing to have a call with because they said you look good? Or an actual friend that your boyfriend isn't aware of? As usual with these types of threads, we simply don't have all the information.
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boom88
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(Original post by Anonymous)
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Just delete the convo when you flirt with guys on snapchat. At least he didn't send a dickpic.
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Anonymous #2
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Trust issues? A guy was flirty and then asked if he could call later, and instead of blocking him or saying 'No', she proceeds to give him a time he could call later?

This generation has gone to the dogs.
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Rock Fan
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Yhh I know he does but what do I do... he puts no effort in anymore... he’s saying he extremely busy with work and what not which i get but do you think lowkey it’s to do with the fact he saw me speaking to someone else ?
The big problem you both have is obviously lack of communication, the moment things go wrong it seems you go straight to another guy to chat to him rather than trying to sort it out.
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Acsel
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Trust issues? A guy was flirty and then asked if he could call later, and instead of blocking him or saying 'No', she proceeds to give him a time he could call later?

This generation has gone to the dogs.
As I mention above, we don't actually know what her relationship is with this guy. I interpreted her saying he's just a friend as someone she actually knows well and is friends with.

But ignore that, the boyfriend had doubts that OP was talking with other guys, which lead to OP letting boyfriend go through her phone in the first place. It's pretty apparent that the boyfriend has trust issues here, that's what started the entire fiasco.

IDK why you felt the need to post anonymously.
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Anonymous #1
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He wasn’t an actual friend no... just someone random of snapchat
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Acsel
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(Original post by Anonymous)
He wasn’t an actual friend no... just someone random of snapchat
Kind of weird to tell your boyfriend that you see a stranger as a friend, just because they complimented you. Let alone telling a random stranger they can call you later.

I'm starting to see why your boyfriend is less trusting of you. They might have started it by asking to look through your phone, but it would seem you are giving him something to worry about
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Tomsunny12
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Seems like you were leading him on a bit . That’s probably what the bf saw .
Obviously the bf does have trust issues aswell
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Acsel)
Kind of weird to tell your boyfriend that you see a stranger as a friend, just because they complimented you. Let alone telling a random stranger they can call you later.

I'm starting to see why your boyfriend is less trusting of you. They might have started it by asking to look through your phone, but it would seem you are giving him something to worry about
Ok yes fine I made a mistake but I told him everything how it wasn’t like that the way he thought as much as it may seem like it...

Now he’s too busy to even talk to me?
Why won’t he admit it’s got em and he needs space or just leave things ... he still wants to see me for sex I’m so confused
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Acsel
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Ok yes fine I made a mistake but I told him everything how it wasn’t like that the way he thought as much as it may seem like it...

Now he’s too busy to even talk to me?
Why won’t he admit it’s got em and he needs space or just leave things ... he still wants to see me for sex I’m so confused
Like we've been saying, your boyfriend does have clear trust issues. It's hardly surprising that something like this is going to have a bigger impact on him than you would wish for. The situation isn't being handled very well and unless you actually have a discussion like adults, things aren't going to be fixed.

If he's too busy but wants to see you for sex, that should tell you what he's really after here
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