We were together for three years, she loved me a lot. She did nothing wrong and it was always me id always blame her. I knew something was wrong with the way i thought and after arguements id realise it wasnt me id realise i saw things wrong. She broke up with me she did it in the best way possible she promised to still be there for me. I couldnt take it i got desperate and i said things the worst things. She blocked me on every single thing she erased me from her life and for the last 4 months ive emailed her hundreds of times everyday even though i know she wont get any of them. I saw myself unravel i understand everything i know all the things i did that hurt her and i understand why she had to leave me. Its destroying my life i cant get over it its like every single second of the day its all ive been thinking of. I have no one to talk to i have no one to tell because she was my bestfriend she was my everything she was the one i told everything to she kept me safe she was my anchor. I cant get over this i cant forget what i did to her, the things i said and i know she wont ever come back to me. She loved me more than life itself and i made her hate me so much.
Last edited by Interrobang; 1 week ago
Hey, breakups can be difficult, so dont feel like youre stupid or whatever for struggling. My first bit of advice is to stop emailing her. It doesn't make you feel better, even though it can feel that way in the short run after sending an email. I know it hurts that she cut all contact with you, but that was probably her way of dealing with this as best she could. Try to find new hobbies that dont involve her, I always recommend some kind of sport or martial art because they teach discipline and its a nice productive way to get out any anger you may be feeling, or will feel. Sometimes in relationships, we hurt the other person, and I feel maybe for you, its important, not to ruminate on these things you have done wrong but learn from them. You will move on, this too shall pass, even if it doesnt feel like it. Remember to take care of yourself OP, make sure to eat and keep up your personal hygiene otherwise you might find yourself feeling even worse pretty darn quickly