My bf is childish Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 6 days ago
#1
When we fall out or have a disagreement, he just wants time alone. So I push him to talk, and pester him with how I’m feeling about the situation, but he doesn’t listen because he becomes volatile, and annoyed. He there for pushes off how I’m feeling and won’t make an effort to heal the situation as he always wants time alone to heal and get over it, guys r so annoying lol
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
reply
HoldThisL
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#2
Report 6 days ago
#2
This isn't really childish, he might not be comfortable with you or possibly unwilling to talk because he hasn't grown into the relationship properly.
0
reply
sknudson
Badges: 18
Rep:
?
#3
Report 6 days ago
#3
You "pester" him with your feelings? Well, at least you're honest.
1
reply
College_Dropout
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#4
Report 6 days ago
#4
Sounds like you're the childish one.
2
reply
Anonymous #1
#5
Report Thread starter 6 days ago
#5
(Original post by College_Dropout)
Sounds like you're the childish one.
How am I childish sorry? I’d love to hear it, will help me improve my behaviour.
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
reply
ChickenMadness
Badges: 20
Rep:
?
#6
Report 6 days ago
#6
(Original post by Anonymous)
How am I childish sorry? I’d love to hear it, will help me improve my behaviour.
because he wants time alone and you're pestering him lol.
2
reply
Dunnig Kruger
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#7
Report 6 days ago
#7
Being compatible in how you deal with conflict is important in a relationship. It can be a deal breaker if you're not compatible in this area.

Are you incompatible in any other important areas?
Such as your attitudes to money?
0
reply
Johndoeskitty
Badges: 7
Rep:
?
#8
Report 6 days ago
#8
He's not necessarily childish, he just deals with situations differently from you. You both have different personalities and this clashes badly when you guys have arguments or whatever. Guys also have a tendency to be scared of anything emotional and their response is to walk out of the room, something like that to distance themselves. Lord knows whenever I fought with my ex he'd storm out and smoke a cigarette instead of talking.

I know it's frustrating because you want to get everything out in the open right there and then but you need to think about how to approach him in a way he'd be more receptive to. If he wants time alone you could say 'let's discuss this when you feel ready' and leave it at that. I also find that people will have their defence up if you come at them in an angry or forceful or 'pestering' manner, so when you do discuss it make sure you come off as calm and not pressuring him. During such a time you could say to him nicely and calmly that you feel like you would appreciate more communication.

If it still doesn't change after that then I'd say you'd have to just accept it as a personality clash and either choose to leave or stay.
0
reply
Bio 7
Badges: 21
Rep:
?
#9
Report 6 days ago
#9
As others have said by you pestering him in an argument you are being the childish one.

His desire for alone time is just as valid as your desire to talk things through, so don’t pester anyone and give him some time, but still make sure to talk to him quite soon after. Find a medium you can both work with.
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
ltsmith
Badges: 19
Rep:
?
#10
Report 6 days ago
#10
the lack of self-awareness is strong with op
2
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Do you give blood?

Yes (56)
8.18%
I used to but I don't now (17)
2.48%
No, but I want to start (257)
37.52%
No, I am unable to (162)
23.65%
No, I chose not to (193)
28.18%

Watched Threads

View All
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise