I’m the oldest girl of a family of 7 and I have it really hard. I’m expected to cook, clean and generally help around the house all the time. I’m in my second year of A levels and I’m struggling. When I tell my mum I try my best to do both revising and helping she goes crazy on me. It doesn’t help that my parents are extremely sexist and think that only girls should do housework whilst boys focus on their education. I like science and do them all at A level which is hard work. If it was up to me I would’ve done midwifery at uni but my mum is forcing me to be a doctor. I’ll do anything to make my parents proud since they’ve done so much for me so I applied for medicine thinking I would learn to love it. I have an interview next week and I’m really stressed out and threats form my mum don’t make it any better. I’m literally crying myself to sleep just questioning everything. I have never felt it this strongly before but I really wish I was born a boy. I would have it so much easier being allowed to pick what I wanted to do and having automatic appreciation from my parents. No matter how hard I try they are never happy. I literally want to run away for a while and just go someplace I can think things through properly.
I don’t know if this I what depression is but I feel low and just sad and I cry ALL THE TIME. even when I get to college I try to switch to the happy me but I just can’t. They threaten to send me back to my homeland if I don’t listen to them .
When I was in secondary I remember I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere with friends but my brother visited different cities with his. Even now if my mum sees me with friends, she’ll judge then later use that against me and say look how you’ve gone all crazy look at the girls you hang around with. Btw my friends are all hardworking studious and respectful individuals but my mum would never believe that.
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