Defining a relationship

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mathperson
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I did write a thread about things relating to this recently (link below), but I just want to know your opinions on vague starts to relationships/lack of willingness to define or put a label on things.

Putting a label on things helps people to know where they are and what the situation is.
But if two friends indicate they like each other and agree to go on a few dates to see how things go, there will be done vagueness with regards to 'what it is', which can be uncomfortable because of the lack of certainty.

My questions are how much vagueness is healthy or even normal, and how much vagueness is 'too much'?

Where is the line between "let's see how things go" and "it's so vague I don't even know what this is?"

Vagueness will of course hopefully disappear as the situation becomes clear and the mist starts to crystalise, but how much vagueness is 'ok' at the very beginning of a relationship and how much is 'too vague'?


My previous thread, describing my situation:
https://www.thestudentroom.co.uk/sho...8#post81914388
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mathperson
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Anybody?
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laurawatt
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Moved to the relationships forum
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anosmianAcrimony
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It's whatever you're both comfortable with, which varies from relationship to relationship.

Probably more important is what you're both expecting out of the relationship, and making sure that those expectations match. When one person expects to be texted back promptly and regularly every day, and the other person doesn't realise; or when one person expects the relationship to include sex but the other person doesn't immediately want that; or when one person expects the relationship to be exclusive but the other person goes and kisses someone else - that's when people get hurt. Labels can mean different things to different people, so it's important to talk this through stuff thoroughly and make no assumptions.
Last edited by anosmianAcrimony; 1 year ago
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mathperson
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(Original post by anosmianAcrimony)
It's whatever you're both comfortable with, which varies from relationship to relationship.

Probably more important is what you're both expecting out of the relationship, and making sure that those expectations match. When one person expects to be texted back promptly and regularly every day, and the other person doesn't realise; or when one person expects the relationship to include sex but the other person doesn't immediately want that; or when one person expects the relationship to be exclusive but the other person goes and kisses someone else - that's when people get hurt. Labels can mean different things to different people, so it's important to talk this through stuff thoroughly and make no assumptions.
Yes I agree.

Essentially I'm just wondering how far into a relationship one can reasonably expect to go before putting a label on the relationship rather than just saying "lets see how it goes", kind of like that I guess.
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