muslim parents and going out.. Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#1
soo a little bit of background info before we start.
i’m 15, i’m muslim and my parents are VERY STRICT. i also have a very understanding boyfriend. a few months back, my mum caught me with him, i would tell them i had after school clubs (school finished at 3 and i’d get home at 5) now they don’t even trust me to get home from school on my own (i live literally two minutes away from school) and it’s so so embarrassing and annoying.
i’ve not been out with my friends in SO long it’s unbelievable. this thursday is my boyfriends birthday, he lives five minutes away from me, across my dad’s friends house so i’m a little worried about going there , but my dad will be in work so he won’t see. i want to ask them if i can go out with some friends so i can spend time with the bf. we never spend time outside of school hours but he’s very understanding about that. i just want to make him happy.
i want advice on how to ask my parents if i’m allowed to go out. i’m really scared because i know he’ll say no but i just want to try. they’ll probably get annoyed and question me none stop but i know this is wrong, but i want to try.
reply
IMD16
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#2
Report 4 weeks ago
#2
(Original post by Anonymous)
soo a little bit of background info before we start.
i’m 15, i’m muslim and my parents are VERY STRICT. i also have a very understanding boyfriend. a few months back, my mum caught me with him, i would tell them i had after school clubs (school finished at 3 and i’d get home at 5) now they don’t even trust me to get home from school on my own (i live literally two minutes away from school) and it’s so so embarrassing and annoying.
i’ve not been out with my friends in SO long it’s unbelievable. this thursday is my boyfriends birthday, he lives five minutes away from me, across my dad’s friends house so i’m a little worried about going there , but my dad will be in work so he won’t see. i want to ask them if i can go out with some friends so i can spend time with the bf. we never spend time outside of school hours but he’s very understanding about that. i just want to make him happy.
i want advice on how to ask my parents if i’m allowed to go out. i’m really scared because i know he’ll say no but i just want to try. they’ll probably get annoyed and question me none stop but i know this is wrong, but i want to try.
That’s haraam lol. Boyfriend at 15. Oh well lol. Anyway I think u should just try and convince them that ur going to ur friends house for revision or something like that. If that doesn’t work just wait for both ur parents to leave the house and ask the bf to come over.
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
1
reply
Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#3
(Original post by IMD16)
That’s haraam lol. Boyfriend at 15. Oh well lol. Anyway I think u should just try and convince them that ur going to ur friends house for revision or something like that. If that doesn’t work just wait for both ur parents to leave the house and ask the bf to come over.
that’s too risky hahah. they’ll tell me they’re going to be back in 2 hours but it will end up being 15 minutes so if they ever come back early then ughhhhh. any other tips? using revision won’t work either because ‘i can revise on my own’ apparenly. 🙄
reply
IMD16
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#4
Report 4 weeks ago
#4
(Original post by Anonymous)
that’s too risky hahah. they’ll tell me they’re going to be back in 2 hours but it will end up being 15 minutes so if they ever come back early then ughhhhh. any other tips? using revision won’t work either because ‘i can revise on my own’ apparenly. 🙄
Ur parents are on another level with strictness. I’m sorry I don’t really know what to do
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#5
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#5
(Original post by IMD16)
Ur parents are on another level with strictness. I’m sorry I don’t really know what to do
(Original post by IMD16)
Ur parents are on another level with strictness. I’m sorry I don’t really know what to do
okayy so, they’ve let me go. BUT he’s told me to give the friends number to my mum before i go? now i’m kinda worried becase i don’t have her number and i just made up a name. any advice on that :/
reply
IMD16
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#6
Report 4 weeks ago
#6
(Original post by Anonymous)
(Original post by IMD16)
Ur parents are on another level with strictness. I’m sorry I don’t really know what to do
okayy so, they’ve let me go. BUT he’s told me to give the friends number to my mum before i go? now i’m kinda worried becase i don’t have her number and i just made up a name. any advice on that :/
Wait did they let you go to your friends house for “revision”?
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#7
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#7
(Original post by IMD16)
Wait did they let you go to your friends house for “revision”?
not exactly, i told them it was my friends birthday and some of us are going to town for a meal and to watch a movie and stuff
reply
IMD16
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#8
Report 4 weeks ago
#8
(Original post by Anonymous)
not exactly, i told them it was my friends birthday and some of us are going to town for a meal and to watch a movie and stuff
But ur actually gonna go to ur bf
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#9
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#9
(Original post by IMD16)
But ur actually gonna go to ur bf
yeahh
reply
IMD16
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#10
Report 4 weeks ago
#10
(Original post by Anonymous)
yeahh
So just get one of ur friends to give their number to ur mum or dad. And then tell them to tell ur parents that ur with them at the meal.
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
mgi
Badges: 17
Rep:
?
#11
Report 4 weeks ago
#11
(Original post by Anonymous)
soo a little bit of background info before we start.
i’m 15, i’m muslim and my parents are VERY STRICT. i also have a very understanding boyfriend. a few months back, my mum caught me with him, i would tell them i had after school clubs (school finished at 3 and i’d get home at 5) now they don’t even trust me to get home from school on my own (i live literally two minutes away from school) and it’s so so embarrassing and annoying.
i’ve not been out with my friends in SO long it’s unbelievable. this thursday is my boyfriends birthday, he lives five minutes away from me, across my dad’s friends house so i’m a little worried about going there , but my dad will be in work so he won’t see. i want to ask them if i can go out with some friends so i can spend time with the bf. we never spend time outside of school hours but he’s very understanding about that. i just want to make him happy.
i want advice on how to ask my parents if i’m allowed to go out. i’m really scared because i know he’ll say no but i just want to try. they’ll probably get annoyed and question me none stop but i know this is wrong, but i want to try.
You have some challenges here. Not sure what you can do except see him at school during breaks and lunchtime. Your parents are not helping you by not trusting you at all. You don't sound as though you sit down with them ever to have a mature conversation about what their concerns are and what dating means to them. Eventually they will have to let go as you will become too old anyway but it would be good if you could get to talk in a civilised manner to them about things that matter to you and them!
0
reply
Anonymous #1
#12
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#12
so, no ones probably bothered BUT. i did go out with him and we had an amazing day we wanted to go to someplace else but the train startion was closed so we ended up going to the beach which was an hour and half walk from where i live, which was good because no one i knew was there. we stayed hidden and cuddled, all sorts of stuff, had fun, etc. i paid for everything (food, drinks, ice cream, etc) and it was all under £20, which is the amount of money my parents gave. they thought i was going to town but HA they thought wrong 😏 it was just great and i hope they don’t ask me any more questions about it. i was constantly paranoid and stuff but it was good :,)) i was back 10/15 minutes later than i should have been back by, but that’s fine, they didn’t ask many questions on that. he’s a white boy but holy **** i’m in love. for all the muslims out there, if i’m able to convince a white boy to convert to islam, will i get rewards? like if i teach him about Allah, the faith and culture and whatnot. and if he converts becase of how he thinks it’s a better choice and for God, nor for love? i know i’m only 15 but just thinking ahead ahah. i’m kinda against the arranged marriage thing or the ‘we’re bengali muslims so you have to marry a bengali muslim’ sorta thing :/
reply
Anonymous #1
#13
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#13
(Original post by mgi)
You have some challenges here. Not sure what you can do except see him at school during breaks and lunchtime. Your parents are not helping you by not trusting you at all. You don't sound as though you sit down with them ever to have a mature conversation about what their concerns are and what dating means to them. Eventually they will have to let go as you will become too old anyway but it would be good if you could get to talk in a civilised manner to them about things that matter to you and them!
(Original post by mgi)
You have some challenges here. Not sure what you can do except see him at school during breaks and lunchtime. Your parents are not helping you by not trusting you at all. You don't sound as though you sit down with them ever to have a mature conversation about what their concerns are and what dating means to them. Eventually they will have to let go as you will become too old anyway but it would be good if you could get to talk in a civilised manner to them about things that matter to you and them!
it’s haraam (forbidden) to date in islam, so my parents aren’t happy about it. they’ve talked to me about how i shouldn’t hang around with boys or do anything stupid, silly, shameful, etc. if i asked them about dating they wouldn’t be happy. they don’t want anyone in the muslim community to see what i’m up to as its ‘bad and embarrassing’, especially if it concerns boys
reply
IMD16
Badges: 11
Rep:
?
#14
Report 4 weeks ago
#14
(Original post by Anonymous)
so, no ones probably bothered BUT. i did go out with him and we had an amazing day we wanted to go to someplace else but the train startion was closed so we ended up going to the beach which was an hour and half walk from where i live, which was good because no one i knew was there. we stayed hidden and cuddled, all sorts of stuff, had fun, etc. i paid for everything (food, drinks, ice cream, etc) and it was all under £20, which is the amount of money my parents gave. they thought i was going to town but HA they thought wrong 😏 it was just great and i hope they don’t ask me any more questions about it. i was constantly paranoid and stuff but it was good :,)) i was back 10/15 minutes later than i should have been back by, but that’s fine, they didn’t ask many questions on that. he’s a white boy but holy **** i’m in love. for all the muslims out there, if i’m able to convince a white boy to convert to islam, will i get rewards? like if i teach him about Allah, the faith and culture and whatnot. and if he converts becase of how he thinks it’s a better choice and for God, nor for love? i know i’m only 15 but just thinking ahead ahah. i’m kinda against the arranged marriage thing or the ‘we’re bengali muslims so you have to marry a bengali muslim’ sorta thing :/
Well done for actually going out!
Also getting him to convert might be a stretch rn because he might not want to learn about all the religion stuff but idk give it a shot!
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
0
reply
Anonymous #2
#15
Report 4 weeks ago
#15
This seems to be a trend lately. Most of these stories appear to be with 'white boys'.
reply
Anonymous #3
#16
Report 4 weeks ago
#16
(Original post by Anonymous)
so, no ones probably bothered BUT. i did go out with him and we had an amazing day we wanted to go to someplace else but the train startion was closed so we ended up going to the beach which was an hour and half walk from where i live, which was good because no one i knew was there. we stayed hidden and cuddled, all sorts of stuff, had fun, etc. i paid for everything (food, drinks, ice cream, etc) and it was all under £20, which is the amount of money my parents gave. they thought i was going to town but HA they thought wrong 😏 it was just great and i hope they don’t ask me any more questions about it. i was constantly paranoid and stuff but it was good :,)) i was back 10/15 minutes later than i should have been back by, but that’s fine, they didn’t ask many questions on that. he’s a white boy but holy **** i’m in love. for all the muslims out there, if i’m able to convince a white boy to convert to islam, will i get rewards? like if i teach him about Allah, the faith and culture and whatnot. and if he converts becase of how he thinks it’s a better choice and for God, nor for love? i know i’m only 15 but just thinking ahead ahah. i’m kinda against the arranged marriage thing or the ‘we’re bengali muslims so you have to marry a bengali muslim’ sorta thing :/
Did you shag him?
Posted on the TSR App. Download from Apple or Google Play
reply
Anonymous #1
#17
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#17
(Original post by Anonymous)
Did you shag him?
no ofc not, i might have a boyfriend but that’s haraam enough for me lol. but like fr i have some self respect and decency so i’m not just going to shag at the beach??? or before marriage tbh
reply
Anonymous #1
#18
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#18
(Original post by Anonymous)
This seems to be a trend lately. Most of these stories appear to be with 'white boys'.
call it a trend but my areas filled with white people 🤷🏽*♀️🤷🏽*♀️
reply
Anonymous #1
#19
Report Thread starter 4 weeks ago
#19
(Original post by IMD16)
Well done for actually going out!
Also getting him to convert might be a stretch rn because he might not want to learn about all the religion stuff but idk give it a shot!
yeah i know but i was just thinking about the future? say i meet someone at uni and i’m ready then i guess it would be good, right?
reply
hajerox123
Badges: 8
Rep:
?
#20
Report 4 weeks ago
#20
..
Last edited by hajerox123; 4 weeks ago
0
reply
X

Quick Reply

Attached files
Write a reply...
Reply
new posts
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise

Where do you need more help?

Which Uni should I go to? (155)
18.65%
How successful will I become if I take my planned subjects? (81)
9.75%
How happy will I be if I take this career? (141)
16.97%
How do I achieve my dream Uni placement? (119)
14.32%
What should I study to achieve my dream career? (79)
9.51%
How can I be the best version of myself? (256)
30.81%

Watched Threads

View All
Latest
My Feed

See more of what you like on
The Student Room

You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

Personalise